Top Ten-uous Connections to the British Royal Family

I have a connection to the British Royal Family! 'S'true! The item with author Peter James is my tenuous connection but the others are made up. Use some of them at your next dinner party if you like. Or not....
The Top Ten
1 Peter James (my favourite author's) mother, Cornelia James, used to be glove maker for the Queen

This is a true fact, so I'm well in there! I'm still waiting for the Royal Garden Party invitation though. I guess it keeps getting lost...

2 My ex- neighbour's next door neighbour's brother's wife's sister's boyfriend's daughter's friend once played a maid to Her Majesty in an amateur dramatics play.

So ya think that's special? My barber's girlfriend's sister's hairdresser's accountant's cousin's daughter gave birth to her neighbor's nephew's father's brother's twins... at a Queen concert.

3 My neighbour's ex-wife's cousin has a dog named Princess Di
4 My best friend's mother's sister once saw the top of Princess Anne's head in a crowd
5 Standing at the gates of Buckingham Palace, I once saw a shadow of a woman behind the window with the same figure as the Queen - so it must have been her
6 My best friend's mother's sister's middle name is Victoria

Well, ex's sister's ex's sister's middle name is Victrola,' cause she goes around so much.

7 My sister's ex-boyfriend's ex-girlfriend's boyfriend used to live in Prince Albert Street

My uncle's cousin's third wife on his mother's side (? ) had a grandfather who smoked a briarwood, and always had Prince Albert in the can.

8 My friend's friend's friend of a friend did the the Duke of Edinburgh Award at school

Knew a guy who new a guy who knew a girl who knew a lotta guys who new a guy who tried to do Duke Ellington at the Apollo. Security hit him so hard, when he woke up, his clothes were out of style. The Duke may have swung, but not like that!

9 I use toilet tissue which is by appointment to Her Majesty the Queen and has a crown on the packet

Aw, BG: Now you're telling me the QUEEN needs to use toilet paper. First, Sophia Loren...Now THIS! A lifetime of comforting fancy is crumbling before me very eyes.

10 My cousin's (twice removed) daughter was born five days before Prince Harry

Damn, BG...Ya mean they had to yank the poor kid out twice? Stinkin' National Health.

BAdd New Item