Best Disses Ever

cleverclogs0

Here are very good disses and insults, hope you like them. Don't agree with the list? Vote for an existing item you think should be ranked higher or if you are a logged in, add a new item for others to vote on or create your own version of this list.

The Top Ten

1
Your mum is so fat that even Dora couldn't explore her
Another bad insult, but I suggest you use it for critical situations as this insult could hurt emotions badly.

cleverclogs0

Everyone know that diss is old but still it's really cool
This is a great Dis I used it on all of my friends and they laughed there heads off and I said it to my cousin and he got so mad and started crying because he thought his mum was very sad and his mum was actually laughing about how stupid he was being because he said Oy don't insult my mum you idiot your so mean and went off in a huff. Laugh out loud this is useful.
[Newest]This is the most disses in the world and it makes sense, you guys you can make better then that mostly from the dissing competition.
More comments about Your mum is so fat that even Dora couldn't explore her

2Take that mask off, Halloween is not until October.
Very creative joke and it's funny. Nice Job.
I said that to my brother and he cried! I was laughing at this joke for so long!
This diss was amazing, I've used it countless times and it worked, and it has never failed me. Also used it on my sister and she didn't bother me for weeks :D
[Newest]I used this on my obnoxious cousin! He thinks he is so swag and thinks he has the best disses, but this really shut him up!
More comments about Take that mask off, Halloween is not until October.

3You could be very useful iin the army; your face kills faster than any gun or bomb
A very bad insult, I hope you like it.

cleverclogs0

This was so funny I fell and couldn't stop laughing
This totally needs to be number 1 in high school disses like these would put people into SHAME. They wouldn't dare mess with you, AGAIN. And I should know 'because I'm a star disser
[Newest]That's jokes no one could fight against it
More comments about You could be very useful iin the army; your face kills faster than any gun or bomb

4Do aliens exist? Wait that's a stupid question, I'm looking at one right now.
Oh, my. That's good. But I don't know... I like the others as well. TOO LATE I VOTED FOR THIS ONE! I like this one. Who told you this?
Yes, I did just call you that. I hope you're glad. JK, JK, JK. I don't wanna get a thumbs down. This is just a way to defend yourself. Sort of.
I hope this insult would help you win your dissing contest

cleverclogs0

I'm going to try that on my friend. We diss each other a lot, and he always gets fake mad, then I have to say sorry, otherwise he won't talk to me.
[Newest]Laugh out loud! And unlike some of the jokes, this one makes actual sense and doesn't make you look like an idiot :D.
More comments about Do aliens exist? Wait that's a stupid question, I'm looking at one right now.

5Hey, I can make a song about your teeth ' black and yellow black and yellow' and you need to hear the remix 'green and purple green and purple'
Made me laugh out loud for ages. The diss is a masterpiece. The person who made it is a genius he should be master of disses. If there was a diss contest he would be crowned king of all disses. When I grow up I want to be a genius like him.
Peace out.
An obnoxious diss!

cleverclogs0

I totally used this one with my friend. The green and purple part is really original, though. Hm. Gotta try this on another person who thinks his teeth look good
[Newest]Yo that one is funny it made me laugh All day
More comments about Hey, I can make a song about your teeth ' black and yellow black and yellow' and you need to hear the remix 'green and purple green and purple'

6You're so fat that when you jumped into the Atlantic Ocean, it turned into the Atlantic Desert!
A cool diss

cleverclogs0

Dude this I great used it on some annoying guy and he hasn't bothered me since
Hahah that's jokes, I'm gonna use it on someone!
[Newest]Oh laugh out loud laugh out loud :v haha
More comments about You're so fat that when you jumped into the Atlantic Ocean, it turned into the Atlantic Desert!

7You're so dumb when somebody was trying to steal your T.V., you were chasing him saying you forgot the remote
Laughing my ass off laugh out loud your classic
It is so funny I couldn't stop laughing
That so good I said that to someone during class and we had a new teacher so she laugh
[Newest]Once I heard this joke, I was laughing for 25 minutes non-stop!
More comments about You're so dumb when somebody was trying to steal your T.V., you were chasing him saying you forgot the remote

8You're so ugly when your mum picked you up from school and dropped you at home she got arrested for littering.
This is the best diss I have ever heard in my life. Who ever wrote this is a genius. In fact the truth is I am the one who wrote this awesome diss. Like I said. Best diss ever. Later
I'm SO using this one!
Dang that's a really funny/good one!
AHAHAAHAHAAHAHAAHAHAAHA PAUSE HAHAAHAHAAHAHAAHAHA LONGER PAUSE AHAHAAHAHAAHAHAAHAHAAHAHAA LONGEST PAUSE AHAHAAHAHAAHAHAAHAHAAHAHAAHAHAAHAHAAHA 30MIN PAUSE HAHAAHAHAAHAHAAHAHAAHA
[newest]
Awesome this should be at number 1
More comments about You're so ugly when your mum picked you up from school and dropped you at home she got arrested for littering.

9When yo mama jumps, she makes earthquakes. When yo mama breathes, she makes tornados. When yo mama swims, she makes tsunamis. When yo mama dies, she makes happiness.
This epic 1 I'm definitely gonna use this 1
Cool I'm using that laugh out loud
AMAZING! WHY ISN'T THIS number 1!
[Newest]Yolo this diss is barman epic
More comments about When yo mama jumps, she makes earthquakes. When yo mama breathes, she makes tornados. When yo mama swims, she makes tsunamis. When yo mama dies, she makes happiness.

10Your head is so big that you put the moon out of business
A very good insult.

cleverclogs0

I've personally never heard this one but its so funny!
I told that to someone who was so annoying that they stop talking to me, and I also tried other ones too and it worked so thanks.
[Newest]Laugh out loud your head must be way to big I'm gonna try this diss on some1 n see what happens laugh out loud
More comments about Your head is so big that you put the moon out of business

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The Contenders

11You are so poor that you run after a garbage truck with a shopping list
I took my time looking at what diss was the best but this is seriously underrated. So funny, should be number one.
Ohh I can't wait to use it on a boy in my class
Laugh out loud totally usin this
[Newest]There is this girl in my class who thinks she can dis everybody and I told her that and she was so speechless she was really shamed
More comments about You are so poor that you run after a garbage truck with a shopping list

12You're so fat when you walk past a window, we lose sun for four days.
Another cool diss

cleverclogs0

HAHAHA this is hilarious. It's a really good joke, would totally sting in a competition with the right timing and right attitude.
CLASSIC NEVER AND I MEAN NEVER HEARD THAT ONE BEFORE
[newest]
This is a tight diss
More comments about You're so fat when you walk past a window, we lose sun for four days.

13You're so ugly that Medusa didn't want to look at you because she thought you were a mirror and she didn't want to be turned to stone.
Got to use these
That is such an awesome one
You so ugly when you went to church you made jesus on the cross turn around
[Newest]First I know it's a joke but mirrors don't turn you to stone when you see medusa
More comments about You're so ugly that Medusa didn't want to look at you because she thought you were a mirror and she didn't want to be turned to stone.

14You're so poor when you invited me round to dinner there were 3 beans on a plate and I took one and you said "Oy! Don't be so greedy"
You're so poor you eat cereal with a fork to save milk
Worst "unsmooth" joke ever. If you told this to me I would just laugh in your face and it would not be because of the joke!
That is s joke
[Newest]So good laugh out loud
More comments about You're so poor when you invited me round to dinner there were 3 beans on a plate and I took one and you said "Oy! Don't be so greedy"

15Your mums so fat that when she went to sea the whales came up and started singing "we are family"
Lool I heard diss one already
Laugh out loud this is the ultimate number 1
Hilarious gonna use this!
[newest]
I like using this one it is the best
More comments about Your mums so fat that when she went to sea the whales came up and started singing "we are family"

16You must have been born on a highway because that's where most accidents happen
This is so cool. I used this on the meanest kid in my class and his never teased me again
Nice laugh out loud why isn't that #1
Cool I used it
[newest]
Laugh out loud never heard this one befor
More comments about You must have been born on a highway because that's where most accidents happen

17You're so fat that the only letters of the alphabet you know are K F C
That so funny, I am laughing and my mum walked in and she asked what so I told her she peed her pants I am voting for you because you have the best one, my friends is obsessed with chicken too
Laugh out loud awesome diss definitely using this one
This is an awesome diss really good to use in a dissing competition
[newest]
HAHAHHA I'm definitely winning the cuss battle at my school
More comments about You're so fat that the only letters of the alphabet you know are K F C

18Roses are red, violets are blue, faces like yours belong in the zoo. Don't worry, I'll be there too, not in a cage but laughing at you
You lyf NYC one
I love this diss but hear this one you are so ugly your mom put a pic of you and put on the gate and rote be awa of the dog
Wicked I used it on my friend and she backed out straight after
[Newest]It's so funny I could not stop laughing laugh out loud I'm soho na use this on someone
More comments about Roses are red, violets are blue, faces like yours belong in the zoo. Don't worry, I'll be there too, not in a cage but laughing at you

19What died on your neck? Oh - it's your head.
Horribly mean... But funny. Just be careful how you use this one. Love, Not Hate (:
Great joke! By the way it's hate not love you got it mixed up
I love it! I'm definitely using this one, I mean laugh out loud!
[newest]
This should be #1 it's hilarious :D
More comments about What died on your neck? Oh - it's your head.

20You're so ugly even Bob the Builder couldn't fix you
Boy you thought your funny your sweet as honey
That is a swag dis
Oh laugh out loud GOOD ONE ME LIKEY:-) :-) :-)
[newest]
I love this joke I should yous it on my x friend. laugh out loud!
More comments about You're so ugly even Bob the Builder couldn't fix you

21Yo mama is so stupid that she starved to death in the grocery store
I think that a good diss
I have heard that 1 before but it still made me laugh.
Ace I hurt ma self when I read it
[newest]
That is so not nice
More comments about Yo mama is so stupid that she starved to death in the grocery store

22You're so poor even African people made you a charity.
YOU ass not every one is poor in Africa there are people in my country (South Africa) that you wish you were get your common knowledge up!
That is so rude are you rich yeah didn't think...fool
This is just rude. There are lots of poor people around the world. why do you have to use Africa
[Newest]Why not just use your house instead of Africa racist ass
More comments about You're so poor even African people made you a charity.

23You're so fat when you're sitting around the house, you're really sitting AROUND the house!
So funny- I can't get over it laugh out loud
I hope you get this one.

cleverclogs0

You can do better but no offense this 1's a bit pointless
[newest]
I read this diss and sharted
More comments about You're so fat when you're sitting around the house, you're really sitting AROUND the house!

24You're so ugly when you went to the ugly contest they said no professionals
Nice gonna use it today. Its a very good one. It should be at the top of the list.
Haha I used this already but still funny
This diss just tops it off I was LMFAO
[newest]
Good diss cause your anaconda is fat
More comments about You're so ugly when you went to the ugly contest they said no professionals

25You're so ugly when you were born the doctor slapped your mother
I laughed for a long time. I told that to somone, and I got slapped, but eh, it's still funny
This is good. The guys at school shut afterwards
Very funny laugh out loud
[newest]
This one is good too
More comments about You're so ugly when you were born the doctor slapped your mother

26Your mom so poor she can't even afford to pay attention
Wicked ha ha laugh out loud
Laugh out loud I used this on a bully at school! He actually reported me laugh out loud
Haha that one caught me off guard.
[newest]
I couldn't stop laughing in this one
More comments about Your mom so poor she can't even afford to pay attention

27Yo mama is so fat that people mistake her as another planet
Is that it man that ain't funny
Is that it fam that is barley na ing come on you could do better didn't make me laugh at all
That is all you got that is so boring
More comments about Yo mama is so fat that people mistake her as another planet

28You're so bored with your life you're reading this
Umm... Actually.. You were reading this page too...
Um.. Some people are trying to get funny comebacks so that they can use them on other people! And you said we're so bored because we're reading this that must mean your bored. Not funny at all, so lame!
You created the page you idiot that means your life stinks the most, infact I think you that this is the only thing you did Al day looser. Lame!
[Newest]So... Why did you WRITE THIS?!
More comments about You're so bored with your life you're reading this

29You're so ugly you made Justin Bieber feel happy
Laugh out loud! I HATE JUSTIN BIEBER!
Laugh out loud I hate Justin Bieber this put a smile to ma face ;)x
Everyone should really use this
[newest]
Your are so ugly you made the ugliest person on earth cry.

You make fun of people just so you can feel better on the inside.
More comments about You're so ugly you made Justin Bieber feel happy

30Yo mama is so sweaty that she caused a tsunami
Should of been "yo momma so sweaty she caused a flash flood

31You are the reason why Hitler was born
This is jokes man were did you get this from! :) laugh out loud!
This is what you call laugh out loud
These is the best they should put 1 laugh out loud
[Newest]Have you heard this your so black you went to night school the teacher marked you absent
More comments about You are the reason why Hitler was born

32You're so stupid you stole a free sample
Laugh out loud it's the best ever
Haha laugh out loud
Ha ha that made me laugh so hard
[Newest]That is epic so funny
More comments about You're so stupid you stole a free sample

33You're so ugly that Hello Kitty said bye bye to you
Holy crap, this is so awesome! Thank you so much for making my day! =D
They are all cool
This was the best
[newest]
Could also be: you're so ugly One Direction went the other direction
More comments about You're so ugly that Hello Kitty said bye bye to you

34Yo mama is so fat that when she went into Wal-mart, she lowered the prices!
That one isn't that good
Rubbish worst I cood make abetter one than that
This one is rubbish
[Newest]Yo mama is so fat her baby pictures were taken via satellite
More comments about Yo mama is so fat that when she went into Wal-mart, she lowered the prices!

35You're so fat you were mistaken as a new planet bigger than Jupiter
This is not funny
Not so funny I can make a better one here yo mama so dumb she stoped at a stop sign and waited for it to say go
This is some hilarious diss I've just read. Well done whoever wrote this
[newest]
Are you playing with me... This is wast of my time
More comments about You're so fat you were mistaken as a new planet bigger than Jupiter

36You're so ugly you make onions cry.
Yo man listen to my cuss your so fat that when I was watching the titanic and you walked past I missed the whole thing
Said this to my mate, laugh out loud laugh out loud laugh out loud
This was really funny
[newest]
You're the one who made my cry now
More comments about You're so ugly you make onions cry.

37Yo mama is so fat that when she went into the cinema, she sat next to everybody
I don't get this its so wack
I think I would work betting if you sed she sat on everybody
A little weak but I get it

38Your mom does not need the internet because she is already world wide
Its ok but if your trying to be mean to the person why don't you say instead you don't need internet because your already world wide or something like that because it would be horrible to say something like that to there mum its not like you would like it
I made a guy cry like this but really its a little to mean and really don't recommend you using this except if your in a dire need of a good comeback or if you you just want to get the upper hand a a fight. It would be better if it was directed to th person who you were dissing or cussing (whichever one you prefer)
Nice sick, really ice!
I can say that to my haterz
Its somethings to get in someones face
[newest]
Rolling on the floor laughing but you should rather say YOUR MAMAS SO FAT SHE doesn't NEED THE INTERNET BECAUSE SHES ALREADY WORLD WIDE
More comments about Your mom does not need the internet because she is already world wide

39Your house is so small that every time you ring the door bell the toilet flushes
This is so funny. I can just imagine it actually happening.
So cool! Where do you get this from? I'm gonna use this
This is amazing! I'm gonna use this! This should be number 1!
[newest]
Laugh out loud I can't stop laughing
More comments about Your house is so small that every time you ring the door bell the toilet flushes

40Your mum is so fat, when she tried to commit suicide between two cliffs, she got stuck
That's funny but not the best I ever heard
That's so funny laugh out loud make that into a film laugh out loud
What a good one! I think this should be 2nd
[newest]
It's a awesome comeback if you were a girl is kiss you
More comments about Your mum is so fat, when she tried to commit suicide between two cliffs, she got stuck

41You're so ugly that when you were born your dad looked at your mom and said what a waste of sperm
It was so funny, me and my friends were having a dis contest and I used this one and that shut them all up
AMAZING PEEING MYSELF THERE NEVER KNEW HOW SPERM COULD BE SO FUNNY laugh out loud! SHOULD BE NUMBER 1!
Nice diss going 2 use that
[Newest]It's so funny can't stop laughing
More comments about You're so ugly that when you were born your dad looked at your mom and said what a waste of sperm

42Your lips are so dry whenever you drink milk they go snap, crackle, and pop
That was nice I kno a lot of people with dry lips I could say that to lots of peeps I was laughing out loud (lo-l) it made me laugh a lot swear it is gonna be used on lots of people... Srry for the long note
I was eating cereal when I red this
I tried this on one of my friends and everyone was laughing you should try it it is amazing to do to other people my name is joshua and my brother keenan thanks
More comments about Your lips are so dry whenever you drink milk they go snap, crackle, and pop

43You're so fat that you put two cellphones in either side of your pocket and call the other one it says "long distance"
Laugh out loud so funny no joke your so that you put two cellphones in either side of your pocket and call the other one is says LONG DISTANCE LO... Lo l So fun ney ha ha too funn lo l why I'mi typing like thi S.
Funniest joke ever I'm gonna use it
That is hilarious man had me deadinxg fa years
More comments about You're so fat that you put two cellphones in either side of your pocket and call the other one it says "long distance"

44Your mom is so old that when she went to school there was no history
Good one 1000 1000
HAHAAHAH laughed so hard at this this is such a good one!
This one is a-mazing!
[newest]
Well, at least my mom wasn't a head mistress back then
More comments about Your mom is so old that when she went to school there was no history

45You are so poor
You are so poor I was on my way home from work and kicked a stone and just then your mom fell out saying who is knocking
We'll this ain't a good one
This os the most stupidest joke I have ever heard! Get a life idiot
[Newest]What kind of diss is this
More comments about You are so poor

46You're the reason why the Titanic sank
Laugh out loud I used to say this all the time!
If bricks were ugliness you would be the Great Wall of China
Laugh out loud awesome so funny I used it on my friend and he started to cry
[newest]
Titanic sank before we were born you dub guy
More comments about You're the reason why the Titanic sank

47You're so fat when you stepped on a scale, it said one at a time please!
It is really funny. It is really funny. I'll use it on a friend of mine and see what he thinks. I laughed at it really hard!
Classic dude really classic, I'm using that one
It's really funny. Il try it on my cousin see what he thinks
[newest]
Heard this on the Garfield Show and I loved it ever since.
More comments about You're so fat when you stepped on a scale, it said one at a time please!

48You're so stupid when you made a mistake on the computer you used white out
Cool diss laugh out loud

49Yo mama is so stupid that when her computer said, "Press any key.", she couldn't find the "any" key
What a funny diss
BEST DISS EVER WELL don't BEST BUT FUNNY laugh out loud :)! 11
This is so funny how could she not know what any key is
[newest]
Ohh I get it laugh out loud
More comments about Yo mama is so stupid that when her computer said, "Press any key.", she couldn't find the "any" key

50If you really want a joke look in the mirror
Amazing. That is a reall good joke
Best Dis Ever So simple But so funny Can't stop laughing every time I hear it
I'm definitely using this on my friend who doesn't get anything I say
[newest]
Good one! I laugh every time I hear it to!
More comments about If you really want a joke look in the mirror

51You're so stupid you went to the doctor and said "Doctor, doctor - I need a new butt my old one has a crack in it".
It's so obvious but cool at the same time laugh out loud
Laugh out loud that actully quite good
Yo that's a nice one!
[newest]
I know this one
More comments about You're so stupid you went to the doctor and said "Doctor, doctor - I need a new butt my old one has a crack in it".

52You're so stupid you climbed over a glass wall to see what's on the other side
Laugh out loud this is the funniest/dopiest diss ever and that's why I love it
Cool jk but what if its an one way mirror?
Awesome diss used this on the school bully and he ran away bawling
More comments about You're so stupid you climbed over a glass wall to see what's on the other side

53You're so ugly your own reflection runs away from you
This joke is so three thousand and lateIn fact it I'd seriously boring
So your reflection will just go through the wall is that what you saying in this good dis (not)
It has no were to run if you close the door
More comments about You're so ugly your own reflection runs away from you

54You're so fat when you stepped on the scale it said I want your weight not your ID number
That's jokes blad the best one ever!
That Is cool I'm gonna say it to someone
I rate this as #1
[newest]
Damn it ooh KILLEM nice hit
More comments about You're so fat when you stepped on the scale it said I want your weight not your ID number

55You're so ugly, you make blind kids cry
That was an awesome diss got to use that one
What a diss if you don't vote for this you suck like a rotten egg man, nice diss bro nice
Laugh out loud that is funny imma use it
[newest]
You fail and your mark is 00000000
More comments about You're so ugly, you make blind kids cry

56You're so fat that when you went to Safeway it was not safe anymore
Laugh out loud that's actually a good diss
Laugh out loud godly dis
Stupid who came up with that

57Your dad's a pedo
That is teribl
That's not nice at all
Whoever made this destroyed the meaning of dissing
[newest]
No don't kill it
More comments about Your dad's a pedo

58You have more issues than a magazine stand
HAHA that's really funny!
That's so funny it shows you talk a lot
Hahah love this one

59You're so fat drugs can't get you high.
Sucks its supposed to be your moma so tiny when she smokes weed she can't even get high
Laugh out loud for certain someones that is tr
That is laugh out loud so funy
More comments about You're so fat drugs can't get you high.

60You're so ugly, you turned Medusa to stone
This one is so good I used it for 2 years
That's so old, I heard a CAVE MAN say it DINOSAUR
How come when I looked medusa didn't turn to stone
More comments about You're so ugly, you turned Medusa to stone

61Yo mama so old when she was born the Dead Sea was just getting sick
Hahah this is a good one
Me neither, what does it mean?

62You're so fat you have stretch marks that say McDonalds
Jokes carry on making more cause that joke was sick
Best joke ever. I rate U.
Best one yet. I used it and loved it.
More comments about You're so fat you have stretch marks that say McDonalds

63You're so ugly when God saw you he was confused if it was Halloween or Christmas
I like the rest of the jokes well some cause the rest are a porling but this to offensive and god will be disappointed in you for this cruel nasty outrageous joke
Laugh out loud BUT MIGHT BE OFFENSIVE TO SOME RELIGIONS laugh out loud
Love it so funny
[Newest]Not a diss just making fun of religions
More comments about You're so ugly when God saw you he was confused if it was Halloween or Christmas

64Your mama is so poor she can't even afford to help her kids
That's a bit sad but I guess it's funny though well maybe hilarious! Told this to my friend and she slapped me one mind you we got into a cat fight which did not end well

65Your mama so fat when her ass finally enters the room her stomach has already left
That's such a good diss me and my friend loled for so long
I love this website I go on it every day laugh out loud written by sahara who is 12
Your moms so stupid when I told her to act her own age she died!
This one is not very good
[Newest]And when the ass is in the stomach is already in four other rooms
More comments about Your mama so fat when her ass finally enters the room her stomach has already left

66Yo mama is so poor that she couldn't afford to pay a visit
Laugh out loud good one jkjkjk

67Your momma's do fat when she turned around it was her birthday
You just hide behind her and you don't have to give her presents. I'M A GENIUS!
Great diss use it pretty often comes in handy at times

68Ask your mom what her biggest mistake was she will say it was you
This is quite good ill use it
Best diss so far
Very good one I'm totally using it!
[newest]
Nice one keep it up
More comments about Ask your mom what her biggest mistake was she will say it was you

69When you walked outside wearing a yellow raincoat the sun got jealous
I think it should say "your so fat" at the beggining but good diss
That is a killer I am so going to use that diss it rocks
Laugh out loud here is another you so fat when you were a yellow raincoat their are ladies on the side of the road shouting "taxi! "
More comments about When you walked outside wearing a yellow raincoat the sun got jealous

70Your mama so fat she fell down the stairs without moving.
That is some bad man diss!
So cool awesome joke I'm going to use that lool my name is sadaf
That was so cool

71When you were born your parents didn't know whether to put you in a cradle or a cage
It is rubbish! :@
That cuss broke my heart and I don't wanna hear it again because it happened to my bro laugh out loud

72You're so ugly, you made Chucky look hot.
My friend and I are always looking for good Chucky jokes and this one is perfect! Laugh out loud! I laughed so hard and told everyone. Use this on ALL your enemies! It works! I promise! It makes them stop dead in their tracks and cry!
Thanks for that. The only problem is that Ruby probably doesn't know what Chuchy is. Oh, or that he's really ugly. :D
Your momma is so dumb the movie waspg 17 so she brought 16 of her friends
[newest]
No seriously this dis is true
More comments about You're so ugly, you made Chucky look hot.

73You're so fat you occupy all streets so we don't need protesters
This made me Laugh pretty hard I like how you mentioned the protesters to that made it so much better.

74You're so fat that instead of calling a taxi you hired a skip
Diss one is so funny
I will use that

75You're so dumb you sit on the T.V. and watch the couch.
This is hilarious it made me crack up
I'm using did fr sure. Get it, did.
Laugh out loud this one is the best--nah not really you hairy ballsack
[newest]
You passed the test you got100%
More comments about You're so dumb you sit on the T.V. and watch the couch.

76Your mother is so fat that when she stepped in the shower her feet didn't get wet
How did she get in?
Bcus her belly's in the way?

77Yo Momma's so stupid, that she's really stupid.
This one is lame. How about trying something better000. I definitely wont use this one at all
This one sucks laugh out loud
So simple yet funny
More comments about Yo Momma's so stupid, that she's really stupid.

78If you're reading this you're probably bored in life
You know me very well
Laugh out loud that's so true though my friend went on this and said there was some joke disses on here and she is so right good god

79Your mama is so fat her clothes come in 3 sizes... extra large, jumbo and, OMG it's coming towards us!
That's just too Funny! -Wambles-
Laugh out loud that's so funny
You shood add omj it coming towards us!
[newest]
Couldn't stop laughing at dis. no words.
More comments about Your mama is so fat her clothes come in 3 sizes... extra large, jumbo and, OMG it's coming towards us!

80You're so fat that even Fat Bastard said you are fat
Go and fock your mom
This is so stupid and offensive, you should go to the mall they have lives go get one low life.
Fock your self man highly offensive
More comments about You're so fat that even Fat Bastard said you are fat

81Your trousers are pulled up so high, even LeBron Lames couldn't dunk in it
I think this was crap it won even funny
Laugh out loud I can't stop laughing!
Aload of crap dunk your self

82I like you! Why? Because you are fat.
You must live in a bin because all you write is TRASH!
Dude or girl you so skinny you hide behind a pole they report you missing
I used that on one of my enemies and she ran away crying!

83Your eyes are so big when you look at a map you see people waving
This is an awesome diss I said it to my enemy and it made cry
This dis is so old I heard my granma say it
I love it I am definitely going to use it

84That joke is so old I heard it when I was riding on my pet dinosaur
And the other person should say back: "I knew you were old because of the wrinkles but not that old"
Last time I heard that joke I fell off my dinosaur...
Awesome jokes but we ain't here because life is boring daa
[newest]
Wow you can't come up with ya own jokes that joke is so old
More comments about That joke is so old I heard it when I was riding on my pet dinosaur

85You're so poor when I stepped on a cigarette you said who turned out the lights
Swag know that's what you call a diss laugh out loud
Damn this is a awesome diss, gonna use this to diss my enemies
#AWESOME! I totally love this one!

86Your mama so poor she was kicking a tin can down the street and I asked her what she is doing and she said she is moving
Y are all the jokes abt the moms?...
Laugh out loud...GOOD 1
Why you wanna cuss peeps mamas for, what they gotts do with it, I dare you to say it to a gangster, you gonna die fool
More comments about Your mama so poor she was kicking a tin can down the street and I asked her what she is doing and she said she is moving

87Your mama so stupid she runs around the bed all night trying to catch some sleep
I've got a good one
If someone asks if you can take a joke you say"no that's why I can't take you! "
This joke is really funny
This is stupid get a life
More comments about Your mama so stupid she runs around the bed all night trying to catch some sleep

88You're so fat that when you stood on the scale the scale said to be continued
This is funny but it needs more spice laugh out loud
That's so funny the last time I heard that joke I laughd so hard I fell off my dinosaur

89You're so ugly your mom feeds you with a slingshot
Amazing insult. I will definitely use that
Great disses I have one you you are so ugly your parents play rock paper siccors to kiss you good night
Laugh out loud definitely using this
[newest]
Great joke keep it going
More comments about You're so ugly your mom feeds you with a slingshot

90You're so fat that your bum is two full moons joined together
Its not that funny but iits good
You gotta twerk those moons twerktwerktwerk!

91Your mamas so fat when she got on an aeroplane it turned into a submarine
What a mad joke
This is my favoirte diss
Probably because the aero plane fell
More comments about Your mamas so fat when she got on an aeroplane it turned into a submarine

92Your mama so dumb she brought a spoon to the Superbowl
Haha
That's funny
Ill use day soon**~»sıp pooƃ
This was so funny I was crying and I almost died of cardiac arrest
Its laugh out loud
More comments about Your mama so dumb she brought a spoon to the Superbowl

93You are so ugly that the grass turned black
This one was the best ^^

94You're so fat and white that when you went to school people thought it was December
Very good diss and yes he is allowed to say white because there stupid flipping disses about black people and everyone laughed this is funny there should be more like this
I kno right there was a racist black joke up there too ⬆
That crap because if you say that you will get expelled
[newest]
That is just stupid and racist
More comments about You're so fat and white that when you went to school people thought it was December

95You're so small that an ant seems to be bigger
Here is one your so small you take swiming lesson in a hose pipe
Laugh out loud never thought would come a cross a "your so small" joke :P

96Whenever an earthquake happens, it's a sign to show that you're walking
Best should be number one!
Used it and made a guy shut up
Sad but hilarious. How on earth did you think about that
Rude for reals man you got some rude in yo genetics
More comments about Whenever an earthquake happens, it's a sign to show that you're walking

97Your teeth are so yellow, people can just sunbathe by looking at you
Your mother is like a cane field man just want to break and suck in she
But not if you had your mouth closed
Your so ugly you make onions cray

98I don't know what makes you so stupid, but it really works!
No. 100 should be higher up
Awesome laugh out loud
Laugh out loud that should be 79

99You're so fat that when you went swimming, the blue whales said come back brother
Me and my friend made a really funny one you are so fat when you went swimming the whales all jumped up and sang we are family even though your fatter than me
Nice diss, we laugh so hard!
Laugh out loud I said that to my friend he started crying

100When you opened your mouth a guy yelled out 'taxi'
I don't get that. Totes lame!
The guy yelled taxi because your teeth are yellow, and some taxis are yellow (a cab)
I already knew that
[newest]
Funny joke but not hularious
More comments about When you opened your mouth a guy yelled out 'taxi'

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This list was created 3 years, 86 days ago and has been voted on over 8,000 times. This top ten list contains 692 items, has been remixed 18 times and has been blogged about 15 times.

Updated Wednesday, October 01, 2014


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