Worst First Names for a Boy

August 5, 2015 - Don't agree with the list? Vote for an existing item you think should be ranked higher or if you are a logged in, add a new item for others to vote on or create your own version of this list.

The Top Ten

Come on poor kid has to fight for his life in the schoolyard daily.
I want to kill the father who named their son like that. Poor kid. This name should not be allowed
Ha! Poor freakshow! Someones going to get bullied. He should change his name
[Newest]Come on. Really just no

Um... I was going to say something funny, but some people might get offended. Don't worry, I have a funny name too.


HA HA HA Such a funny name who would name their son penis its the same as dick


Dont hurt yourself trying to think funny.


[Newest]That should be number one

Satan... Ookayy...

Who named their kid satan anyway?
I would NEVER name my baby boy Satan.
Because satan is bad
[Newest]What!? Who would name their kid Satan? 👿

Be bad if you're last name was "Ball"... How would you feel?
I see nothing wrong with Ian or Colin though.


This is a joke. I think the parents were not ready to have a child and they wanted to blow him away through a cannon.


This is my name, childhood was miserable. But, I can ALWAYS get my name on any social network, or email, or website. I've always felt bad for people named John, it's like you say the name and 9 other people pop up. So lame.
[Newest]Boom! Goes the cannon.

-_-... Why the heck would you name your own son Abcde? I feel sorry for the boy... And now I feel like I want to Sing the alphabet...
I'm NOT JOKING! On the radio they said something about worst names and this guy called and said his friend was called ABCDE! By the way its pronounced A-Bes-i-ty. Sounds like obesity. Abcde is a bad name on SO many different levels
My little sister's classmate is Abcde. I had to ask him so many times because I confessed I wasn't hearing his name right, until I asked him to spell it out.
[Newest]I have to admit, it's actually unique. I've never met someone named abcde before. I had never heard of it until now. Props to whoever thought of that.

"Hey look, Tom Cruise has Seaman on his back! "
Seaman... Like the dog on the Lewis and Clark expedition?
I would hate to be named Seaman.
[Newest]Son of Poseidon, I assume?

The Angus burger comes from some of the best beef in the world, developed in Scotland... Aongheas (Gaelic spelling) is a very common name there, hence the name of the breed. A very ancient and proud name in Scotland.
Well, if your baby is fat, this is the one for you
Wow, that's the dumbest name after my 6 oz angus burger at Burger King!
[Newest]Although its on the worst boys name I like the name angus and cannon

This is not a name! What a sad guy who would name his child this sounds like something you say when your bored. Seriously is anyone even called this!
That's a name? Wow. My mom is a daycare teacher and sometimes I volenteer there when I don't have school and I've heard some names like Wheeler and Hero It's so upsetting knowing these kids will live there entire lives with stupid names
I make this noise when I am confused. "Ib! Ib! "


[Newest]Who would name kids Ib

I think that Ian is a hot name. I had a friend in my middle school named Ian and he was pretty cute. I don't think that Ian is a bad ugly name. Anyway when I have a son I am going to name it Ian.
Damn, he must of been the candles of a roasting fire in your opinion!
If I had a dog, I'd name it Ian, as a joke. Wolfgang is a beautiful name by comparison. Ian deserves to be at the top of this list. All those unfortunate Ians out there would at least be able to sleep at night knowing that they were at the top of a list for once. No offense intended
What are you talking about the meaning of the name Ian is "god is forgiving" not "it"! So Ian is a good name to have!
[Newest]Maybe it's because it's my best friend's name but this one will always hold a special place in my heart.

Mario bros... sounds like luigi but this is just a gross name!
Its a great name laugh out loud ill call my dad this :]
Hi I am a eleven year old girl and Weegee? Really? You can see the word Wee in it. Well at least you can't see the word poo in it.+_+
[Newest]Weegee, you are going to get bullied BADLY at my school. Blame it on your parents for naming you that.😒

The Contenders

Um, a dude named Laqueesha? Is this for real or is this site trolling?
Sounds like some sort of noodle.

"Son come get your laqueesha and meatballs!."
Ghetto girl name, his parents were probably high thinking of the name
[Newest]This sounds like a cool girl name.

Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart is the name of the famous composer
Sounds like a gangs of wolves and a baby of a person should be not named by this, your child will kill you


When I was in school we were learning about him and that's exactly what I was thought
Wolfgang is a cool name example : Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart
[Newest]I absolutely hate this name

Oh no, it's Osama! Let's kill him again!
It was pure unlucky that Osama (bin laden) was born and terrorized... Although anyone else I am fine with the name "Osama"
Thisis the worst name anybody could ever name a kid
[Newest]I think the name is cute

Elmo?! The parents of this child must be seriously deranged.
I think they were getting ready for the baby so much that they watched too many cartoons...
I think the parents should take LEGAL drugs. And not get drunk while choosing baby names
[Newest]What? Elmo is cute!

This is a girls name! HELO? Maybe that's Ash Ketchum's real name...


Thus is my friends name and he's a boy
The guy in gone with the winds is called Ashley. Plus, it isn't that bad! 😕

I have a friend named Skyler and I thought he was a girl cause of his long hair
Skyler, I am the one who knocks!
It seem his parents cannot spell. As in Fillup.
[Newest]It sounds like a cool name.


Best name ever, a-hole.
My father almost named me this!


My brother is 14 his name is Zane and everybody thinks his name is awful because it has the same pronunciation as the one from ID but he really hates them.
[Newest]I had a kid in gym class named this

I hate to be mean, but who that isn't high on some kind of narcotic would name their kid Blanket?


Give me back my blanket!
I want my blanket!

You can't name your kid something like this and their siblings something normal like Jack or Billy
Now paint the kid green! Laugh out loud for a Halloween costume
Shrek is love. Shrek is life 😘
[Newest]Is his girl friend named Fiona?

What is wrong with this name? It's quite cool actually.
This is an unique and beautiful name many great celebrities have that name including my favourite YouTuber :).
Fix it Felix! Reminds me of wreck it Ralph. And plumbers.
[Newest]What! This name is awesome!

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This list was created 7 years, 114 days ago and has been voted on over 4,000 times. This top ten list contains 629 items, has been remixed 20 times.

Updated Wednesday, August 05, 2015

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