Worst First Names for a Boy

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The Top Ten

1
Dick
Um... I was going to say something funny, but some people might get offended. Don't worry, I have a funny name too.

aeromaxx777

HA HA HA Such a funny name who would name their son penis its the same as dick

noontime123

Dont hurt yourself trying to think funny.

fireinside96

[Newest]Which was invented first, the name or the word for penis

2Gaylord
Come on poor kid has to fight for his life in the schoolyard daily.
I want to kill the father who named their son like that. Poor kid. This name should not be allowed
Ha! Poor freakshow! Someones going to get bullied. He should change his name
[Newest]Oh my god this is child abuse. I feel sorry for the poor kid who is named this. He should demand that his parents change his name because he probably gets bullied everyday! Why is this even a name!

3Satan
Satan... Ookayy...

Who named their kid satan anyway?
I would NEVER name my baby boy Satan.
Because satan is bad
[Newest]Satan isn't as bad as "gaylord"

4Cannon
Be bad if you're last name was "Ball"... How would you feel?
I see nothing wrong with Ian or Colin though.

Guido

This is a joke. I think the parents were not ready to have a child and they wanted to blow him away through a cannon.

Slashhead

This is my name, childhood was miserable. But, I can ALWAYS get my name on any social network, or email, or website. I've always felt bad for people named John, it's like you say the name and 9 other people pop up. So lame.
[Newest]I think he loves cannons

5Abcde
-_-... Why the heck would you name your own son Abcde? I feel sorry for the boy... And now I feel like I want to Sing the alphabet...
I'm NOT JOKING! On the radio they said something about worst names and this guy called and said his friend was called ABCDE! By the way its pronounced A-Bes-i-ty. Sounds like obesity. Abcde is a bad name on SO many different levels
My little sister's classmate is Abcde. I had to ask him so many times because I confessed I wasn't hearing his name right, until I asked him to spell it out.
[Newest]I have to admit, it's actually unique. I've never met someone named abcde before. I had never heard of it until now. Props to whoever thought of that.

6Ib
This is not a name! What a sad guy who would name his child this sounds like something you say when your bored. Seriously is anyone even called this!
That's a name? Wow. My mom is a daycare teacher and sometimes I volenteer there when I don't have school and I've heard some names like Wheeler and Hero It's so upsetting knowing these kids will live there entire lives with stupid names
I make this noise when I am confused. "Ib! Ib! "

username34

[Newest]Who would name kids Ib


7Ian
I think that Ian is a hot name. I had a friend in my middle school named Ian and he was pretty cute. I don't think that Ian is a bad ugly name. Anyway when I have a son I am going to name it Ian.
Damn, he must of been the candles of a roasting fire in your opinion!
If I had a dog, I'd name it Ian, as a joke. Wolfgang is a beautiful name by comparison. Ian deserves to be at the top of this list. All those unfortunate Ians out there would at least be able to sleep at night knowing that they were at the top of a list for once. No offense intended
What are you talking about the meaning of the name Ian is "god is forgiving" not "it"! So Ian is a good name to have!
[Newest]I think it is so hot

8Laqueesha
Um, a dude named Laqueesha? Is this for real or is this site trolling?
Sounds like some sort of noodle.

"Son come get your laqueesha and meatballs!."
Ghetto girl name, his parents were probably high thinking of the name
[Newest]That's a ghetto girl's name but not for a boy!


9Angus
The Angus burger comes from some of the best beef in the world, developed in Scotland... Aongheas (Gaelic spelling) is a very common name there, hence the name of the breed. A very ancient and proud name in Scotland.
Well, if your baby is fat, this is the one for you
Wow, that's the dumbest name after my 6 oz angus burger at Burger King!
[Newest]Although its on the worst boys name I like the name angus and cannon

10Seaman
"Hey look, Tom Cruise has Seaman on his back! "
Seaman... Like the dog on the Lewis and Clark expedition?
I would hate to be named Seaman.
[Newest]That sounds like semen, animal semen!

The Contenders

11Weegee
Mario bros... sounds like luigi but this is just a gross name!
Its a great name laugh out loud ill call my dad this :]
Who would name their kid weegee?
A immature mother!!
Meow!!!!




-Meows

meows

[Newest]How would name a kid Weegee it sounds like wedgie

12Osama
Oh no, it's Osama! Let's kill him again!
It was pure unlucky that Osama (bin laden) was born and terrorized... Although anyone else I am fine with the name "Osama"
Thisis the worst name anybody could ever name a kid
[Newest]I think the name is cute

13Wolfgang
Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart is the name of the famous composer
Sounds like a gangs of wolves and a baby of a person should be not named by this, your child will kill you

ronluna

When I was in school we were learning about him and that's exactly what I was thought
Wolfgang is a cool name example : Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart
[Newest]Ugh what a stupid gangster name!

14Ashley
This is a girls name! HELO? Maybe that's Ash Ketchum's real name...

Pikachulover1

Thus is my friends name and he's a boy
It's actually a boy name but it sounds better on a girl.

15Skyler
I have a friend named Skyler and I thought he was a girl cause of his long hair
Skyler, I am the one who knocks!
It seem his parents cannot spell. As in Fillup.
[Newest]It sounds like a cool name.

SammySpore


16Dakota
No I like that name for a guy okay and of you don't that's fine but that ne is grate
My name is Dakota and I think that it's pretty cool. I'm a girl though so I can't say that I've been bullied for being called Dakota. I just don't like the nickname Kota, unless we're talking about Brother Bear!
Only Girls Are Named Dakota For Crying Out Loud! I Mean come on!

17Zane
My father almost named me this!

gunsnroses

Best name ever, a-hole.
My brother is 14 his name is Zane and everybody thinks his name is awful because it has the same pronunciation as the one from ID but he really hates them.

18Elmo
Elmo?! The parents of this child must be seriously deranged.
I think they were getting ready for the baby so much that they watched too many cartoons...
I think the parents should take LEGAL drugs. And not get drunk while choosing baby names
[Newest]La la la la la la la la Elmo's World!

19Blanket
I hate to be mean, but who that isn't high on some kind of narcotic would name their kid Blanket?

username34

Give me back my blanket!
I want my blanket!

20Shrek
You can't name your kid something like this and their siblings something normal like Jack or Billy
Now paint the kid green! Laugh out loud for a Halloween costume
Shrek is love. Shrek is life 😘
[Newest]What a cute name.

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This list was created 7 years, 39 days ago and has been voted on over 4,000 times. This top ten list contains 587 items, has been remixed 18 times.

Updated Friday, May 22, 2015


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