Worst Insults Ever


These are some stupid things to say in a fight. Consider yourself stupid if you use them. Some of these are okay, but it really depends on whose saying it. Don't agree with the list? Vote for an existing item you think should be ranked higher or if you are a logged in, add a new item for others to vote on or create your own version of this list.

The Top Ten

I know you are but what am I?
This is so dumb. You can't just keep saying it even if it doesn't make sense!


I have a little cousin who annoys me. Whenever I burn him with an insult, he says this. About ten insults later, I say this because it's the only insult he knows and he replies with "that doesn't make any sense! What a retard.
That is the most COMMON comeback EVER! In fact it's so stupid I hear 3 year olds saying it. The best way to deal with meanies is just smile and act nice. Don't use comebacks because half the ones that come out of everyone's mouth is STUPID! (And makes you sound like an idiot) So let's try to avoid that.
[Newest]This list must be named "Lamest insults ever"


2You're dumb!
This is pretty bad and I have heard about everything there is to say
Yeah no need to say that if everyone else knows! (Duh! )
I know I am dumb

3(Has the same shirt as you) Your shirt's stupid!
Okay, its either their just playing around or they have some serious mental problems.


It is just dumb! My sister said that to me once when I was wearing one of her shirts and she didn't even realise what she had done!
Then the person is insulting themselves
[Newest]No comment (sigh idiot) -_-

4A hobo calls you poor.
All this one needs is a little improvement and it will be a good insult.
This is so easy to make a comeback.


This is OFFENSIVE if they change it a BIT

5I don't like your pencil.
Who frigging cares?


That is the stupidest thing I ever heard as a insult.
I hate yours as much as you hate mine because. We have the same pencil
[Newest]It's just so... haha I couldn't stop laughing

6You're a nerd.
I am a nerd and its not offensive


This one is dedicated to a guy
Some people are fully aware they're nerds, and they don't mind or love it.
[Newest]I'm a nerd and I'm proud!

7I'm better than you! I can find the spacebar!
Wow... And I can find the keyboard!
I was gonna say that
I can even find a bar in space not a space bar that is very hard to find (not)
[Newest]Yeah but you can't find the off button

8Poop thinks you stink
He is the one that smells
This is just great.

9Yo momma!
That is the most annoying comeback ever. Whoever says this is a retard and it makes no sense. When my brother says that to me he is just making fun of OUR mom which is mean and I just tell him to shut up or shut your face
This one is horrible, as I feel it is extremely annoying. I feel like punching their teeth out when I hear this one. How would your mom be incorporated into this? And "yo momma" is only useful in yo mama jokes, eh?
Just no. My little brother uses it way to much. I'll say, "you look half retarded." And them he"ll say, " your mom! " And then he'll crack up like he made an amazing comeback
[Newest]This is so irritating. Whenever I burn someone, they just shout" Yo mamma! ".

10You don't like school. Ha Ha!
That's just dumb
It's not even a proper insult. It's something a three-year-old would say.
I can hate school if a want to
It's the type of things that nerds say to feel good about themselves.


[Newest]This is just sad

The Contenders

11You're so ugly you have to wear makeup
It's so stupid, it made me laugh. How is it not in the top ten? It's the best worst joke ever.
So stupid.. I just no.. No
This is a good one used it many times

12You're so slow my crappy internet is faster than you
Made me laugh for some moment

13Your a self-obsessed weasel!
It's just plain stupid.

14Not As Much As Your Face!
Where have I heard this before? Oh yeah, BAILEY RICKER!


Haha I hear this being said too much!

Me: You are really stupid!
Derpyperson: Not as much as your face!

What that makes no sense

15You smell like a zoo

16If I put your brain in a bird it would fly backwards
That's kinda stupid and kinda funny

17You're a tenth of 1% as gross as Justin Bieber
Tenth of 1% goes a long way. JB is a far right nutjob, an abusive boyfriend, a terrible singer, an all around douche. There are hundreds of douchey things he has done.

18I have a gameboy and you have a Wii U ha ha!
Who even put this on here! Wii you is awesome and same with Gameboy but this is stupid


Wii you and game boy are both good.

19You're so fat, I wouldn't mistake you for a elephant
This is so funny I'm going to use this on my cousin j

20You are poop!
5 year old saying

21Experimental Baboon

22you're an idiot
That's probably THE worst thing you can ever say. Its not even a insult!

23You look like you were born in a car accident.

24Your dad told me you should have been a wank

25You eat poo

26You suck
When people say this, you can tell They didn't take the time to think up a good insult.

27What is that smell? Oh it is you
That's what 5 year olds say

28You're so ugly that your mother mistook you as an octopus

29Your so chubby the back of your head looks like a pack of hot dogs
Wasn't this on "The Amazing World of Gumball"?
Good to use on fat people

The worst insult, you should put this on #1, when people say that as a comeback, Beck should be disappointed of him


31Suppurating fundament
Just a name-call but it baffles people and when they look-up the words in the dictionary they get annoyed - GA

32Your momma's so fat... it affects her self esteem

33Swag pennies have more value than you
Ooh you got dissed

34You're such a pain in the gluteus maximus
This is just something you say to make you look smart. Who says gluteus maximus anyway?

35You're a worse artist that Anthony B!

36You're a failed abortion.
You are so stupid that if you you were 100% smarter a chair will be smarter dan you


38It looks like your face was on fire and someone tried to put it out with a hammer
Now that was good

Does this one remind anyone else of the Soldier from TF2?

40You're so ugly, Bob the Builder said he can't fix that
Haha... Bob the builder... Lol.. , that's funny

41You play like a girl
Weird because girls can be very athletic... If sports are what the insult is for at least...

This is what my little sister says

43You are as fat as L.G

44I am better than your leg

45Do your parents know you are gay?
Gotta admit this is a good one if the person can't reply with anything other than yes or no

46Remembering you is like throwing up

47Goodbye drunken mistake

48You're so stupid that Patrick is smarter than you

49You're an insensible, filthy dirt rag.

50You're a rotting, cannibalistic slug.

51You revolting, morbid abomination.

52You're a diseased plague to the human race.

53You're just jealous.

54You useless paperclip
Heh, this is the best one.

55Did the short bus drop you off?

56You and your family should die in a fire
That's not an insult that's just plain rude

57A: Knock knock B: Who's there? A: Orange B: Orange the what? A: Orange your FACE!!!!

58Your face

59Poopy head

60Booger eater

61Have you looked in the mirror lately

62Your mum is so poor I saw her kicking a can down the street I said what are you doing she said moving house

63Dick Face

64You are a human!
This is so stupid... Well no duh, man!

65You are a poo poo face

66So Lame

67You smell like a dead crab

68I'd Rather Listen to Nicki Minaj Than Look at You

69Pee Pee Pants

70Crappy Pants

71Up Yours

72Your teeth look horrible. Are you British?
This insult goes too far. You try to insult one person, but you end up insulting an entire nation.

73You're such a Boris
My name is Boris...

74Did you say something?
This is so annoying, I think of a good insult and my brother just returns this to me... I know he's listening :-P

75What you say, what you are.
This is so stupid... I say something and thy return it.

76You're a meanie head

77Piss Off

78You smell like a stinky man

79You're a poopy head

80Doo do head

81Scuzz Bucket!

82Yah right.

83You're so ugly, when I look at you, I know there is no god

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This list was created 2 years, 107 days ago and has been voted on over 500 times. This top ten list has been remixed 5 times.

Updated Sunday, April 26, 2015

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