UK Top 100 2015 Ranked

Puga 2015, when the big-name popstars started to go into hiding and obscure fellas started swarming in. It was good in moderation, but 2017 onwards is all your fault, 2015. Hi, I'm Puga and I'm ranking a chart which picked a Bob the Builder song as the number 1 song of 2000. I liked 2015. But how much did I like 2015? Letsa find out.

2017 RAP TIER (0/5)
100. Fight Song - no comment required.
99. Shake it Off - haha you think the haters are onky getting to her now, 2015 people? You have no idea.
98. Lips are Movin' - Meghan Trainor at her best.
97. All About That Bass - at least this one had good intentions....
96. Like I Can - shut up Sam Smith.
95. Marvin Gaye - a twig and a whale try to get me horny in 4 minutes. It turns out as good as you'd expect.
94. I Don't Like it, I Love it - this is insultingly basic, even for Flo Rida's standards. What exactly did Robin Thicke add to the song?
93. Flashlight - another forgettable song from Janet J.
92. Watch me - thanks a lot, Silento. You started all this.
91. Stay with Me - shut up Sam Smith.
90. Ayo - obnoxious. Abrasive. Clamorous.
89. Not Letting Go - this is really below both of your standards. Especially you Tinie.
88. GDFR - more like generic dance for retards haha right guys
87. Jealous - hey Nick you mind changing that one lyric? It just makes you seem really entitled and pretentious. Nick? Lyric? Nick?
86. I'm Not the Only One - shut up Sam Smith.
85. Trouble - stick to singing songs about being fancy while acting unfancy.
84. Wasn't Expecting That - giving a James a guitar never ends well.

AWFUL TIER (1/5)
83. Up - (2008)
82. Thinking Out Loud - hey you know how Ed Sheeran had by far his best song last year when he didn't do a slow, dull, uninteresting song? Hey let's do the complete opposite of that
81. Lay it All on Me - hey that seems like a really good idea
80. Photograph - yep sounds perfect let's do it
79. Hotline Bling - has any human being ever actually had an emotional reaction to this song?
78. All of Me - this was everywhere for like 2 months and it only reached 50 haha what the hell
77. Hold Back the River - giving a James a guitar never ends well.
76. Glitterball - about 40% of this chart is generic dance that varies in quality by the way.
75. Let it Go - woah naming a song Let it Go while the Frozen hype train is still going strong huh what a coincidence James Bay
74. Good for you - how do you do fellow adults?

BAD TIER (2/5)
73. Do it Again - allegedly a bigger song than All of Me this year but my first time hearing it was during making this list. And I remember nothing.
72. Freak of the Week - yearly generic rapper has generic sex song.
71. Time of our Lives - a Pitbull song should never be bland. A heartbreaking betrayal.
70. When the Beat Drops Out - I did not recognise many song names when I first saw this list, but remembered them instantly when I listened. This is the exception, and for good reason.
69. Sugar - one of Marroon 5's worse attempts at predicting the year's trend. Still the same below average result.
68. 679 - this was apparantly a huge hit? Ok.
67. Writing's on the Wall - Sam Smith I will not tell you again.
66. Easy Love - tame.
65. On My Mind - sounded nice, but Ellie Goulding opened her mouth.
64. Drag me Down - well, you guys clearly miss Zayn.
63. Show me Love - not very good.
62. Worth It - really good prechorus, really bad everything else.

OKAY TIER (3/5)
61. Bang Bang - the bad, the good and the good.
60. Bills - it fails as a comedy song but sounds nice.
59. Peanut Butter Jelly - Time
58. I really like you - a pretty high place for a chorus with those lyrics.
57. Where are U now - Skrillex and Bieber seemingly left their personalities at home.
56. Outside - first Sam Smith, now Ellie Goulding: DJs know how to make really bad singers sound good.
55. Want to Want Me - boring. A Jason Derulo song that is boring.
54. Say Something - this is by "Karen Harding" and not Christina Aguleira.
53. Elastic Heart - zzzzzzz.
52. FourFiveSeconds - zzzzzzz.
51. Budapest - this song reminds me of Hungary all right. I'm Hungary for excitement.
50. Prayer in C - this is the most upbeat church music I've ever heard.
49. Love me Like You Do - It's okay.
48. The Nights - FIFA 15.
47. What do You Mean - better than Where are U now. By about a hair. Or 10 songs.
46. What I did for Love - there is only so high I can place Emeli Sande on any list.
45. Heroes (We Could Be) - this could be average. And it is.
44. Wings - in literally any year this decade apart from this one this is a huge hit.
43. Locked Away - Adam Levine is worried about getting arrested.
42. Cheerleader - there are worse songs to be the biggest hit of the summer.
41. Somebody - about 20% of this list are songs like this who have been lost in time.
40. How Deep is Your Love - Calvin Harris was very mediocre this year, huh? Thank God this year was just a one off.
39. All Cried Out - see number 41.
38. Five More Hours - see number 39.
37. Intoxicated - see number 38.
36. Gravity - see number 37.
35. Are you With Me - this is also a generic dance song, but people actually remember this one.
34. Ain't Nobody (Loves me Better) - this is getting really boring.
33. Hey Mama - everyone in this song brought their average game.

GOOD TIER (4/5)
32. Trap Queen - hey shouldn't this be at nuMBER 1738 GUYS
31. Love me Like You - another day at the office for the best girl group in the world.
30. See You Again - what TheDoubleAgent said.
29. Earned It - The Weeknd did a few things this year didn't he
28. Stole the Show - any Kygo representation on the charts gets a thumbs up from me.
27. Someone New - I heard this song for the first time last night. I like it.
26. Bloodstream - Ed Sheeran + energy = good
25. Wish you Were Mine - reminder that Mc Pat Flynn sampled this for "Get on Your Knees" right before this song got big. Hm.
24. Omen - keep talking, Sam Smith.
23. Runaway (You & I) - out of all the big dance hits this year this was one of the most deserving.
22. One Last Time - I like Ariana Grande.
21. Blank Space - how is it possible to release this and Shake it Off in the same year?
20. Runnin' (Lose it All) - Beyonce's best song this decade, and that's thanks to Naughty Boy.
19. Take me to Church - powerful voice, attention grabbing, simplistic sounding. This is how you make a song made for it's narrative right.
18. Shut up and Dance - not quite Shut up and Drive but you'll do.
17. House Every Weekend - if all the dance songs this year were like this, we'd be looking at a 75%+.
16. Never Forget You - if they were all like this, it'd be an 80%+.
15. The Hills - this is probably the most atmospheric song on the list. Chills.
14. Lean On - this song contains the best 16 seconds of music released in 2015.
13. Waiting for Love - you're improving you meatball muncher.
12. Real Love - Clean Bandit and Jess Glynne.
11. Don't be so Hard on Yourself - Jess Glynne.
10. Hold my Hand - Jess Glynne.
9. Can't Feel My Face - MJ never died.

CRAIG TIER (5/5)
8. Black Magic - slay.
7. Shine - Years & Years are really good.
6. Firestone - we meet again, Kygo.
5. Uptown Funk - no comment necessary.
4. Chandelier - 1 2 3 1 2 3 4 how many n*ggers are in my store
3. Downtown - this is a masterpiece and tops almost any other year this decade.
2. Rather Be - this is Jess Glynne's 4th song in the top 15. Her making another song is the best thing about 2018 music so far.

BEST SONG OF THE DECADE TIER (6/5)
1. King - I don't feel like I need to explain. You guys have ears, don't you? I mean, just listen to it. Oh wait, King by Years and Years didn't charge in your pathetic American country. Unlucky plebs. The UK wins again.

So, that's a 258/500, or a 52%. A pretty unremarkable result. 2010's up next. jb

Comments

Thank you. SLURP.

"haha you think the haters are onky getting to her now, 2015 people? You have no idea." - Hell yes. - DCfnaf (3/2/2018)

Oh my god I forgot King fizzled out early here

also these days is trash - ProPanda (3/28/2018)

Your op.inion is wrong - Puga (3/30/2018)