Personal Challenge: Ranking Billboard's Year-End Hot 100WonkeyDude98 Inspired by TheDoubleAgent.
So, as you all know, I hated 2015. While it did get better with more thought, still hate it now. To show that, I'm going to rank the Billboard Year-End Hot 100 for 2015. It is seperated by tiers.
Billboard Year-End Hot 100 For 2015
SH** TIER (0 or lower):
#100. No Type: This song is pathetic at this point.
#99. Only: So is this.
#98. The Hills: You're bored of me talking about this and I am too.
#97. Take Me To Church: Hold up, I'm barricading my house. I hate everything about this. I hate the funeral beat. I hate how every element explodes at once during the chorus. I hate the LGBT-supporting lyrics. I hate the overplay.
#96. Cool for the Summer: Take Me To Church except not overplayed.
#95. All Eyes On You: This is just embarrassing. Especially the fact that Nicki Minaj is the best one on the song.
#94. Hey Mama: The only good part of the song is Nicki Minaj's third verse.
#93. Better Have My Money: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA THIS IS ADORABLE
#92. Post To Be: Overplayed and annoying in every way, especially the autotune.
#91: Classic Man: Basically Fancy in every way except worse.
#90. Ayo: Hi....again, Chris Brown....
#89. She Knows: This is just pathetic now.
#88. Watch Me: ...do I need to say anything?
#87. Hit the Quan: Again, nothing needs to be said.
#86. 7/11: Beyonce........WHY? This has gotta be her worst vocal performance ever.
#85. Ex's and Oh's: Come at me haters. I already reviewed this.
#84. Marvin Gaye: Putting this above Ex's and Oh's....
#83. Dear Future Husband: And this...
#82. GDFR: Flo Rida and Sage the Gemini....copypasting Talk Dirty...oh no
#81. Flex: If you don't think about it it's good. If you do, well...
#80. Good For You: Creepy, overplayed, dark, boring, dull, A$AP Rocky...and this...is actually a little unnerving.
#79. Jealous: Boring, generic, entitled, and self-unaware.
#78. Worth It: Talk Dirty ripoff.
#77. Bad Blood: That beat is so bad....those Kendrick verses are so forgettable...that hook is so clunky...
#76. Tuesday: Candidate for most boring song ever.
#75. The Hanging Tree: Not saying this doesn't come close.
#74. Kick the Dust Up: Worst country hit of the year.
#73. House Party: Shallow, generic, useless. Next.
#72. Take Your Time: Nevermind the dull, slow beat. This song fails at its purpose by going too hard for it.
BAD TIER (half star to 1):
#71. Hotline Bling: I already reviewed this. It is one of the only songs to actually get worse as I write my review (I was going to give it a 2 in my review, but midway I gave it a half-star).
#70. Nasty Freestyle: #Pointless
#69. Cheerleader: Yeah my review still stands.
#68. Fight Song: Is this even a song...?
#67. Somebody: Recycles Jeremih's Don't Tell Em...has Jeremih in it. I hate my life.
#66. Want To Want Me: It's Jason DeRülo for Pete's sake!
#65. Talking Body: No element appeals to me, despite it working within the album.
#64. Girl Crush: PFFFT HAHAHAHAHAHAH!!! This is terrible at being a country song.
MEH TIER (2):
#63. Where R Ü Now: This could've been top 30 at first. This fell HARD.
#62. Lips Are Moving: Meghan Trainor.
#61. All About That Bass: Meghan Trainor.
#60. Stitches: Decently produced and Mendes is a good singer bit that's it.
#59. Earned It: zzzzzzzzzzzzz. This is white noise for me.
#58. CoCo: This is adorable....and terrible.
#57. Love Me Harder: Snore...
#56. Slow Motion: Mehh...
#55. El Perdon: Mehh....
#54. Budapest: Mehh....
#53. Ghost: Mehh...
#52. Riptide: Mehh...
#51. Blessings: Mehh....
#50. The Heart Wants What It Wants(a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-aants): Finally we get to ones I care about. Strong production and vocals, as well as decent lyrics, but forgettable.
#49. Truffle Butter: Top 40 material...without Lil Wayne's verse.
#48. How Deep Is Your Love: It's immense strengths (vocals and production) and weakness (lyrics) form a perfect "meh".
#47. Bang Bang: It's fast-paced and a presence but maybe too much.
#46. I Don't Mind: Forgettable and actually a little bit stereotypical (not ALL women are strippers bro) but other than that it's fine.
#45. Heartbeat Song: *sarcastically* Kelly Clarkson's getting more memorable.
#44. FourFiveSeconds: Rihanna: Meh. McCartney: YAAAY BUT HE ONLY PLAYS GUITAR. Kanye: ...ewww....
#43. My Way: Fetty's weakest song, but still solidly fun.
#42. Thinking Out Loud: Genuine and heartfelt, but boring and overplayed.
#41. Renegades: I like rebel songs, but the singer feels flushed out, the song is forgettable, and it's a car commercial.
DECENT TIER (3):
#40. Can't Feel My Face: Yep, a Weeknd song above 2/5. Has a Michael Jackson feel and the subliminal message is cool.
#39. Trap Queen: Fun, unhinged, and genuine, but...his voice.
#38. Photograph: No real flaws but dreadfully boring and specific.
#37. What Do You Mean: May the lord bless you Justin Bieber.
#36. Love Me Like You Do: A bigger version of YKYLI.
#35. Lean On: 2 DJ Snake songs in the decent tier. Darn it.
#34. Night Changes: I remember when this was my least favorite song ever just because of the layout. Lol no.
#33. One Last Time: The good Ariana Grande.
#32. Chains: The good Nick Jonas.
#31. Back to Back: The closest anything will ever get to being savage.
#30. You Know You Like It: Grossly overrated but still good.
#29. Stay With Me: That said...
#28. I'm Not The Only One: A more interesting version of Stay With Me.
#27. Shake It Off: Upbeat, the lyrics are decent, and carefree.
#26. Time of our Lives: Fun. Really fun. Now if only the vocals weren't misaligned from the beat...
#25. Blank Space: This would be higher if it wasn't overplayed and made in a time when I hated Taylor Swift.
#24. Style: This would be higher if it wasn't overplayed, and didn't sound dreadfully like Nick Jonas' Jealous.
#23. Wildest Dreams: This would be higher if it wasn't snuffed by overplay.
#22. Drag Me Down: Greatly produced, all great vocalists (except Niall), and some decent lyrics.
#21. Sugar: Greatly produced, flexible vocals, and some decent lyrics.
#20. Lay Me Down: Pretending Latch and Omen don't exist, Sam Smith will never make anything this good again.
#19. Habits: Strong production, great vocals, and lyrics. Sometimes it's either too broad or embarrassing though (munchies....twinkies....why).
#18. 679: Fun, catchy, light, and also tame.
#17. Like I'm Gonna Lose You: Hey. Don't look at me like that! Give Meghan a break! Don't forget I'm the same person who put Wrecking Ball on his best of 2013 list.
GOOD TIER (4):
#16. See You Again: Technically perfect. But I never want to hear it EVER again.
#15. Honey I'm Good: Fire away. This song is earnest, well-toned, and catchy.
#14. Locked Away: From #1 to #16 on the original, and from #4 to #14 here. That's a scary drop, but I still like it.
#13. Uma Thurman: FallOutBoy's worst song, but still sick nonetheless.
#12. IDFWU: Funny, absolutely terrible, and E40's verse.
#11. Downtown: Funny, well-produced, and self-aware. Also surprisingly coherent.
#10. Hello: Duh.
#9. Here: A break from all the club music. Sigh...also the best hit to release in 2015.
#8. Elastic Heart: The production is crowded and yet cohesive, SIA's massive range cracks trying to contain her emotion, and the lyrics are really complex.
AWESOME TIER (5 or higher):
#7. Waves: Soothing, somber but interesting, and the remix appeals to literally everyone.
#6. Don't: Grimy production, absolute rage and hatred, and great story.
#5. Animals: Hey come on! Give me a break.
#4. Centuries: I will remember this for centuries.
#3. Shut Up and Dance: Fun, catchy, self-aware, and hilarious.
#2. Chandelier: A masterpiece of titanic proportions.
#1. Uptown Funk: Perfection personified.
To further drive my point of 2015 being a bad year, I decided to rate the year on a scale of 0 to 500 by multiplying the score of each song by how many songs received that score, with 500 being a perfect year. Generally, 250 is an average year, with anything 200 and below being absolutely terrible, and anything 300 and above being absolutely amazing. I got...197. This year was terrible.
You hate Take Me To Church for the LGBT supporting lyrics? Are you a homophobe?!?! - djpenquin999
Correction: Anti-LGBT - WonkeyDude98
I thought you said that you didn't support LGBT. - djpenquin999
Exactly. I'm anti-LGBT. - WonkeyDude98
A homophobe is anti-LGBT. - djpenquin999
I'm not actively afraid of LGBT, just against it. It doesn't help that Take Me To Church just nukes Christianity and laughs in the face of it in such a crass, blasphemous, disrespectful way. - WonkeyDude98
Have you even heard of Westboro Baptist Church which pretty much would spit on LGBT's grave? - djpenquin999
No. - WonkeyDude98
Westboro Bapist church takes that stuff way too far. They are an extremist church, that really shouldn't be called a church. And JUST BECAUSE YOU DISAGREE WITH SOMETHING DOES NOT MEAN THAT YOU ARE AFRAID/HATEFUL TOWARDS THE PEOPLE WHO SUPPORT OR PRACTICE IT! (Underlined twice and italicized.)
*drops mic* - RiverClanRocks
*applause* You hit the nail on the head, Tiffany. - WonkeyDude98
Hey, it's what I do. - RiverClanRocks
Also, *baptist. Stupid phone. - RiverClanRocks
Ok, sorry about that :P - djpenquin999
Homophobe! Get his stupid rubbish derriere - Kevinsidis
Can you make one for 2014 and 2013 - ProPanda
I'm thinking about it, but this stuff is a lot of work. - WonkeyDude98
The 5 songs which barely missed this are prayer in c, again, I want you to know, latch, and no flex zone
where do you place them - ProPanda
Prayer In C: Probably #35.
I Want You To Know: #30
No Flex Zone: #100 - WonkeyDude98
No WonkeyDude98 No Flex Zone would be #100000 on your list - AlphaQ
Ok, I'm making a few personal changes, and almost all of them are for Fetty Wap.
*Move Lips Are Moving and Stitches to the two highest on the BAD TIER.
*Move 679 above LIGLY (even if it's still a good song) to #17 and put it on the GOOD TIER.
*Move Trap Queen from #39 to #18 and put it in the GOOD TIER.
*Move My Way up one place, and put it and Renegades on the DECENT TIER.
This means that there are losses of 2, but increases of 4, which brings the score up to 199. Good job, Fetty. - WonkeyDude98
*Move Nasty Freestyle and Somebody into the SH** TIER. Flat pieces of nothing.
*Move CoCo into the BAD TIER. Being a joke isn't an excuse for being bad.
*Move Habits into th GOOD TIER, to be consistent with my 2014 ranking.
SCORE: 197 - WonkeyDude98
100. Marvin Gaye
98. She Knows
97. Dear Future Husband
96. Fight Song
95. Honey I'm Good
94. Hit The Quan
93. Worth It
92. Watch Me
91. Post To Be
90. Flex (Ew Ew Ew)
89. Kick The Dust Up
86. No Type
84. Nasty Freestyle
83. Bad Blood
81. Hey Mama
79. All About That Bass
78. House Party
77. Heartbeat Song
76. Classic Man
72. Bang Bang
71. All Eyes On You
67. I Don't Mind
63. The Hanging Tree
62. Cool For The Summer
61. My Way
59. Lips Are Movin'
58. Take Your Time
57. Shake It Off
56. Want To Want Me
55. Where Are Ü Now
54. Drag Me Down
53. One Last Time
50. Locked Away
49. Time Of Our Lives
48. El Perdon
47. Love Me Harder
46. Talking Body
45. Good For You
44. Thinking Out Loud
43. Earned It
41. See You Again
39. Slow Motion
38. Truffle Butter
37. Hotline Bling
34. Girl Crush
32. What Do You Mean?
31. Stay With Me
30. Can't Feel My Face
29. Wildest Dreams
27. Night Changes
25. Uma Thurman
24. Ex's & Oh's
23. Trap Queen
21. Back To Back
20. The Hills (#noshame)
18. Blank Space
14. Lay Me Down
9. You Know You Like It
8. I'm Not The Only One
7. Elastic Heart
6. Shut Up & Dance
4. Lean On
2. Uptown Funk
AND THE BEST IS...
Take Me To Church
I got a 266/500. That's a 53.2/100. Not bad. - djpenquin999
I'm more than a little surprised 88 through 81 didn't get merged into your NOPE TIER. Other than that, your rankings look pretty predictable. Not in a bad or good way. - WonkeyDude98
Ayo and 7/11 were at least a bit catchy. No Type & Nasty Freestyle didn't really stand out enoug to be horrible. So was BBHMM. Bad Blood at least had a nice drum beat, Hey Mama at least had a nice sample, & Jealous... ok I'll move Jealous to the nope tier. - djpenquin999
I may just have a personal bias against 2015, so I can see how Nasty FreeStyle slipped out. Hey MaMa was David Guetta and Nicki Minaj, Ayo was boring AF, I don't even wanna talk about No Type anymore, BBHMM was pathetic and reminded me of Rae Sremmurd's worst work, I understand Bad Blood, and 7/11...actually, 7/11 deeply creeped me out.
Mainly why I'm asking is because I get appalled whenever these songs are called superior to Fight Song, which at least went for something, and Honey I'm Good, a song I will defend until the day I die. - WonkeyDude98
What's so bad about Honey I'm Good? - RalphBob
People say that Grammer is trying to pass off not cheating on your wife as the most romantic thing ever made. I think there's something people are missing.
I'll defend it by comparing it to a song that did it wrong: Cheerleader by OMI. Grammer was panned for being too earnest and pushy with his refusal. I say OMI was far worse off for not caring enough. See, OMI when asked, not exaggerating, "do I make you feel like cheating", by a girl, he isn't drunk out of his head, and merely says "no not really", like he thinks in the back of his head that it won't matter if he ends up screwing this girl anyway.
Grammer, on the other hand, is influenced by something (alcohol), and isn't asked, but merely enticed, by this girl, and still gives a solid "no, I'm good". See where I'm getting at here? Plus Grammer is just so earnest and likeable, contrary to what everyone seems to think.
While I'm at it, I'm going to defend the other appalling pick: Fight Song. I'd still give it a 1.5/5 no question, but seeing it in the bottom 5 of many lists makes me quiver with rage. At the very least, it tries to do something. It may not have a powerful melody or stand out really at all, but the drums have a lot of punch, the piano has stir, and Platten's charisma does stand out. And when it comes to generic standardness, when you're in a world with Juicy J, Rae Sremmurd, Tyga, Jason DeRülo, and SAM HUNT, you can do a lot worse, am I wrong?
Done. - WonkeyDude98
So many changes it turns one's stomach.
*Back to Back up to GOOD TIER
*Lay Me Down up to GREAT TIER
*I'm Not The Only One up to GOOD TIER
*Shake It Off down to MEH TIER
*Hotline Bling down to SH** TIER
*The Hanging Tree up to BAD TIER
*Wildest Dreams, Style, and Blank Space up to GREAT TIER
*The Hills up to GREAT TIER
*Animals down to MEH TIER
So the score is now 208/500. I think. - WonkeyDude98
*Take Me To Church up to GREAT TIER
*Budapest, Ghost, and Riptide up to DECENT TIER - WonkeyDude98
Let's not forget The Heart Wants What It Wants, Lean On, and You Know you Like It to the GREAT tier,
Also, Riptide still deserves better, it might be my #1, if I were to redo this.
And Honey I'm Good in good? Actually kys. - ProPanda
Take me to church took a huge step up - JamesBourne
Top 10 Best:
2.) Elastic Heart
3.) Shut Up and Dance
7.) Blank Space
8.) Girl Crush
9.) Take Me To Church
10.) Like I'm Gonna Lose You
Top 10 Worst:
1.) Shake It Off
3.) B**ch Better Have My Money
5.) Hit the Quan
7.) Bad Blood
8.) No Type
9.) Nasty Freestyle
10.) Coco - visitor
Top 10 Best:
10. The Hills
9. Wildest Dreams
7. Lay Me Down
5. Take Me To Church
3. Shut Up and Dance
1. Uptown Funk
Not doing worst...yet. - WonkeyDude98
Wait, what got you to change your mind on Take Me to Church? - visitor
Wow Years and Years King didn't even reach Top 100?
You poor souls.
UK >>> - Puga