Kyle's Butt: The Poem

Puga (Guitar strumming starts)
A few months ago on the foolish internet
The final jigsaw pieces for Gluga had been set
But as we all heard, since I had paws and a tail
Due to the law, on the wedding I had to bail

And thus I set out for relationship number two
I had to hook up with a dog but I kept on thinking who
I tried chihuahuas, pug and spaniels, but that wasn't too brilliant
As I only had human eproctophillia

So I set out for a human, who was about my age
Now don't go "You Don't Say-ing" like Nicholas Cage
For my next love wasn't a human; it didn't even live
It was the behind of a 10-year old ginger jew kid

I immediately begin to talk; to the kid, not the ass
And soon after that we were both gone in a flash
As we sat on the bay of Stark's Pond
I told him a secret that he found very fond

After hearing he turned at me, and simply smiled
He said he won't be spilling the beans for a while
As he turned around, I knew nothing would make us part
As his ass leaned over and began to fart

Now some will call me, for writing all this, sick
They will begin to hate me and this damn fanfic
But let me tell you: this is no made up story
This happened in real life: I was there in all it's glory.

Take that, #teamjay!

Comments

You're not safe! - JaysTop10List (8/13/2015)

Kyle has a weird butt to see, at least for me. - PizzaGuy (8/23/2015)

*its glory.

Poseur Grammar Nazi. - PetSounds (8/14/2015)

You read the most breathtaking love story known to man and this is what you point out? - Puga (8/14/2015)

I'm not into guys, or dogs for that matter. So, I' forced to join #teamjay.

They could use a decent poet. - PetSounds (8/14/2015)

You will regret this day, Spencer. - Puga (8/14/2015)

It's not you, it's me. - PetSounds (8/14/2015)

#teampuga

That poem was... Heartwarming. - Turkeyasylum (8/14/2015)

Here's the French version...

Il y a quelques mois sur l'Internet insensé
Les derniers morceaux de puzzle pour Gluga avaient été mis en place
Mais comme nous l'avons tous entendu, puisque j'avais des pattes et une queue
En raison de la loi, lors du mariage, j'ai eu la caution

Et donc je me suis mis en route pour la relation numéro deux
Je devais me brancher avec un chien mais je continuais à penser à qui
J'ai essayé les chihuahuas, les pug et les spaniels, mais ce n'était pas trop brillant
Comme je n'avais que de l'eproctophillie humaine

Alors je me suis mis en route pour un humain, qui était à propos de mon âge
Maintenant, ne partez pas "You Do Not Say-ing" comme Nicholas Cage
Car mon prochain amour n'était pas humain; Il n'a même pas marché
C'était le derrière d'un jeune garçon jadis de 10 ans

Je commence immédiatement à parler; À l'enfant, pas l'âne
Et peu de temps après, nous étions tous deux partis en un éclair
Alors que nous nous sommes assis sur la baie de Stark's Pond
Je lui ai dit un secret qu'il avait beaucoup aimé

Après avoir entendu, il s'est tourné vers moi et a simplement souri
Il a dit qu'il ne répandrait pas les haricots pendant un moment
Comme il s'est retourné, je ne savais rien qui nous ferait part
Comme son cul a penché et a commencé à péter

Maintenant, certains m'appellent, pour avoir écrit tout cela, malades
Ils vont commencer à me haïr et ce foutu fanfic
Mais laissez-moi vous dire: ce n'est pas une histoire inventée
Cela s'est passé dans la vraie vie: j'étais là dans toute sa gloire. - SnerpDoge (8/8/2017)

Charming. - DapperPickle (8/14/2015)

Awesome song James, I like lyrics :D - 05yusuf09 (8/14/2015)

I did a reading of this.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HEtcDjePJUg - visitor (8/15/2015)

I hate and love this so much. - Puga (8/21/2015)

If you haven't seen this yet you need execute - Puga (6/8/2016)

Love the poem - Fabricitem (8/17/2015)

*Electro piano plays*
#teampuga - CerealGuy (8/19/2015)

This reminds me of Patrick Star for some reason - bobbythebrony (8/23/2015)

Greatest post of all time. - Puga (5/22/2016)

Ah, remembering these good times. - visitor (6/8/2016)

*guitar strumming* = hardcore part of Cemetary Gates - SnerpDoge (8/8/2017)

True Poetry - visitor (4/27/2018)

I think I found my new favorite poet.
Michael rosen has some competiotion - visitor (5/3/2018)

None of you guys ever realised I was gay huh - Puga (8/5/2018)

I did. - visitor (8/6/2018)

I was a Pugrandom shipper for a reason - TwilightKitsune (8/6/2018)

Thought it was a joke - visitor (8/6/2018)

I am really confused. - Ashes (11/25/2018)

Lol what 😂 - visitor (12/3/2018)