Top Ten Amusing Variations On Common Sayings

CityGuru

The Top Ten

1 He who laughs last... was slow to get the joke.
2 A penny saved... is nowadays, after taxes and inflation, about half a penny saved.
3 Laugh, and the world laughs with you... cry, and the world laughs at you too, you big sissy!
4 When it rains, it pours... and when it doesn't rain, we complain about that too.
5 People who live in glass houses... better keep their curtains shut!
6 It is better to give than to receive... especially if it's a punch in the face!
7 Give a man a fire and keep him warm for a day, set a man on fire and keep him warm for the rest of his life.

Given the savage, ongoing world events, this really isn't funny.

8 It takes a big man to admit his mistakes... and it takes a bigger one to force the first man to admit them!

That is so true! In fact all of them are true to some extent when applied on this present world. - Kiteretsunu

This is often very legit. This whole list is, but mainly this. - PositronWildhawk

9 Life is like a box of chocolates, it doesn't last as long for fat people.

I used to have a fat teacher in seventh grade which I hated. If only I knew this saying then... - TwilightKitsune

10 Red sky in morning, sailors take warning... red sky at night, sailors ask "Isn't is supposed to be dark at night?"

The Contenders

11 Don't put off until tomorrow what you can do the next day.

I think my dad invented this saying. - Britgirl

12 Whatever doesn't kill you will probably come back and try again.

Unless it died in the attempt.. - TwilightKitsune

13 A penny for your thoughts seems to be a fair price.
14 If at first you don’t succeed, skydiving's not for you
15 One good turn... makes you end up in the opposite direction in which you intended.

It's true, isn't it?
Something to think about. - CityGuru

16 A fool and his money are a great party.
17 A bird in hand is far less sanitary than two in the bush.
18 Don't count your chickens before they are hatched... eat them instead.

I can't imagine a life without eggs, can you? - CityGuru

Well, we obviously wouldn't eat fertilised eggs. - PositronWildhawk

19 A friend in need is a pest

Pest friends forever. - Britgirl

20 An apple a day keeps the doctor away, but an onion a day keeps everyone away.
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4 years, 85 days old

Top Remixes

1. Give a man a fire and keep him warm for a day, set a man on fire and keep him warm for the rest of his life.
2. Life is like a box of chocolates, it doesn't last as long for fat people.
3. Don't put off until tomorrow what you can do the next day.
HenchmanNo2
1. He who laughs last... was slow to get the joke.
2. A penny saved... is nowadays, after taxes and inflation, about half a penny saved.
3. Laugh, and the world laughs with you... cry, and the world laughs at you too, you big sissy!
CityGuru

WRemix

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