Best Chuck Norris Facts

The Contenders: Page 4

61 Superman goes to meet Chuck Norris each year on Teacher's Day

This one was awesome. Really made me laugh. And all these years I thought superman didn't need a teacher!

V 1 Comment
62 When Chuck Norris was born, the only one who cried was the doctor. Never spank Chuck Norris!

To me this is just a classic - it's one of the only decent ones that doesn't just keep talking about his roundhouse kicks. I'm surprised it hasn't shown up on the list yet! - cyclone1248

This is one the best ones here. The only one which has some decent humor. This should go higher up. - Kiteretsunu

63 Chuck Norris can stare at the sun and the sun goes blind V 2 Comments
64 Jack was nimble, Jack was quick but Jack still couldn't dodge Chuck Norris' roundhouse kick.

Good poem. Chuck Norris would be proud of this. - Kiteretsunu

This is amazing because jack is quick and lol

65 Chuck Norris can set ants on fire with a magnifying glass. At night.
66 Life insurance premiums are based on how far you live from Chuck Norris.
67 When Chuck Norris burps issues an alert

Come on guys, this has to be in the top 10! - Animefan12

68 Chuck Norris ordered a Big Mac at Burger King, and got one.

Chuck Norris is the best! I was quietly reading the list and once I've got here it took a few sec until I got it but than laugh out loud

This one is actually really creative! - NerdyPweeps

69 Chuck Norris doesn't use dental floss he uses barbed wire.

Imagine the sheer lacerations someone else would get. - Metalhead1997

This is original and its one of the best I've seen!

70 When ghosts go camping, they sit around a camp fire and tell Chuck Norris stories.
71 Chuck Norris can blow a tornado away

By just barely blowing on it. - Metalhead1997

72 According to Einstein's theory of relativity, Chuck Norris can actually roundhouse kick you yesterday.
73 Superman wears Chuck Norris boxers
74 Chuck Norris had a part in Star Wars. He was the force.

The first to actually make me laugh out loud, haha

He was omnipresent! - Metalhead1997

75 Chuck Norris doesn't mow his lawn, he dares it to grow.
76 People call 911, 911 calls Chuck Norris

This should be way higher, I literally ROFLed at this quite hard

V 1 Comment
77 If you stare at an American flag long enough, a 3D image of Chuck Norris will appear.

How long is long enough? I'm guessing long enough is Chuck Norris in this case. - Metalhead1997

Time to buy a American flag

78 Chuck Norris counted to infinity. Twice.
79 Chuck Norris never ages. Each year is just another year added to his existence, which sucks for you.

Wow that I amazing :D

80 Chuck Norris can drown a fish. V 1 Comment
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8,000 votes
498 listings
10 years, 71 days old

Top Remixes (34)

1. There is no Ctrl button on Chuck Norris' keyboard. Chuck Norris is always in control
2. Chuck Norris got stabbed by a knife. After 2 weeks of pain the knife died.
3. Chuck Norris frequently donates blood to the Red Cross. Just never his own.
1. Chuck Norris converted God to atheism
2. Chuck Norris Can Do a Wheelie On a Unicycle
3. All men are created equal. Equally inferior to Chuck Norris.
1. Chuck Norris invented black. In fact, he invented the entire spectrum of visible light. Except pink. Tom Cruise invented pink.
2. Chuck Norris can delete the Recycling Bin.
3. Chuck Norris once visited the Virgin Islands. They are now just The Islands.

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