Best Disses Ever


The Contenders: Page 9

161 Were You Born On the Highway? Cause That's Where Most Accidents Happen.

So good. when you say accidents you point at their face. the best ever

That is epic I wish I could come up with a shot joke

I like this one but you already said that dumb head I think you are running out of ideas

It was already said on this web

V 2 Comments
162 Your mama is so fat she asked for a water bed and they placed a blanket over the Pacific Ocean.

So funny laugh out loud

U will never be the man your mother is. That's one I made

Haha best one old but gold

You didn't make that up ot was already created sorry kid

V 5 Comments
163 No I can't take a joke that's why I can't take you

I could roast you up son I'm a maverick you should just get a life boy

Ya you can't baby.You will cry.

Laugh out loud
Good joke


V 1 Comment
164 Your momma so stupid she looked at you!

That just clearly dumb there's nothing to it

V 3 Comments
165 You can't hurt me, you didn't even hit puberty

I was itching my testes when I read this and I laughed so hard my sharp fingernail sliced my scrotum

Whoever commented on this ew dude that private

This so funny 1/10 use this against soneone

People u start puberty when your 8 so whoever said they're nine and beat up a 12 year old then u did hit puberty

V 3 Comments
166 You're so ugly whenever you look out the window you have to pay a fine for mooning
167 You're so ugly you made the leaves fall of the trees in the middle of spring

Your to fat when you went to the space half of you was in another universe

Make it better

Lol nice 1 mate

Lol its autumn now

V 1 Comment
168 You so stupid you stole bread

Sha some people are starving out there

Some people do steel bread

Bread is food u kno

Ya meani

V 2 Comments
169 You're so ugly the devil would rather look at the bible

Nice one I'm crying so much! Definitely going to use this

That's mean, but funny in a way

Ohh I read this in the library and I fell of my seat

Nice one

V 2 Comments
170 You're so lame that when you look up lame on the Wikipedia it has a picture of you

Did you get that from your great grandma. Cause I can say that to my dog he won't be offended.

You're so dry that when you look up dry on Wikipedia it has a picture of you lips

Awesome one. I'm so gonna tell my friends this one

That's old, get a life pig

V 3 Comments
171 You're so poor that children in Africa wants to give you all their money.

Stop. Enough with the African jokes.

You shouldn't be talking your mum is so stupid that when I went in your mums house and asked her what's for dinner she took off 3 shoe laces and said spaghetti

That's not funny, your mom is so poor when she invited me to dinner she gave me 3 raw beans and when I took one she said "Hey! Stop being greedy! "

I am an African if I see another African joke I will report whoever posted this

V 14 Comments
172 I don't hate you but if you were hit by a truck I'd be driving it

Number 1 par/diss in the world! I still laugh out loud every time I hear this joke

Definitely saying this to some really really annoying person! Well done.. awesome joke

My haters went crazy over dis 1

Laugh out loud
Here is a diss
It is your birthday and you ask your mum what is my birthday gift. She gives you a small box and you open it and what do you see a gym membership. Ha ha ha

V 3 Comments
173 Yo mama so old that god doesn't remember when she was born.

What man stop with religious jokes


Your mean

Init man.

174 Being mean is not very nice!

Crap this is a best DISSES page not a be nice page.

Disses are used to scare of mean people

Why are you on hear

He's mental - kennytime68

V 2 Comments
175 You're so fat when you went into space there was no space.

This is stupid boring

Should be in the top 10

Mamma Mia this must have been a very fat person!

I have to do this dis on my friends!

V 1 Comment
176 Your mum is so stupid, she smudged soap and propaganda papers on my head and said 'I am brainwashing you'

This is so funny I'm going to use it on someone. THANKS

I made this up

This sucks!

177 You're mamma so fat when she sat on a dollar a booger came out of George Washington's nose. V 4 Comments
178 Yo mama so fat that when we put her picture in a frame it broke

This was the driest joke I ever heard

V 3 Comments
179 You're so ugly that all mirrors that you pass by break.
180 Yo mama so dumb she tried measuring how long she slept with a ruler

So funny I couldn't stop laughing

Ya bro so funnyyy

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List StatsUpdated 26 Sep 2017

27,000 votes
1,207 listings
6 years, 82 days old

Top Remixes (35)

1. You're so stupid you drowned in a Mexican wave
2. When you were born your mother told your father what a beautiful treasure and he replied yes let's go bury it
3. You're so stupid you sold your cellphone for airtime
1. Your mum is so fat that even Dora couldn't explore her.
2. Take that mask off, Halloween is not until October.
3. You're so fat that the only letters of the alphabet you know are K F C.
1. Your mum is so fat that even Dora couldn't explore her.
2. Hey, I can make a song about your teeth 'black and yellow black and yellow' and you need to hear the remix 'green and purple green and purple'.
3. Your head is so big that you put the moon out of business.

View All 35


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