Best Insults


The Contenders: Page 6

101 I'll be honest; I can't tell if your mom is even human.

How is this not in the top 10?
I told my friend about it and he almost pissed himself laughing! This insult makes you seem intelligent, I don't know why, but its just so awesome!

almost crapped myself laughing Why is this not top ten or twenty? I'm totally going to use this on a short prick in my school who nobody likes.

I will use this in school

My horse is too high to get off it safely

V 4 Comments
102 You're so poor when I walked in your front door I fell out the back door

Haha! Excellent insult for som littl twat at my school! Lemme show him who he really is! This is like so funny

I have a better one. when I walked into your house I said I have to go toilet and you said pick a corner

Jeez, so rude when I said it 2 my bigger sister who lives in a huge house... she fainted

That was so funny great when you have been to a friends house before and seen their house was so small

V 14 Comments
103 Close your mouth! Crap is coming out of it.

Dude that's funny I used that on these dudes at school being jerks and they shut right up

Awesome couldn't stop laughing

Great one if your deeply offended

Fave one so funny! This is the only one that actually made me ' giggle' šŸ˜‚šŸ˜‹

V 4 Comments
104 Your mama is so fat she wore high heels and struck oil.

Another insult is

Your so skinny if you ate a meat ball you would look pregnant

This is a retarded insult.

Good insult

105 Yo mamma so dirty she makes mud look clean

That's cool but not great

Well its ok does anyone have better ones share them here

Awesome and the bully actually cried!


V 7 Comments
106 You so ugly you made Frankenstein look dreamy

Frankenstein is the doctor.

Fun Fact: The monster didn't have a name so you should call it " The Nameless Monster."

Frankenstein is gorgeous.

Looks like frankenstein will have some sort of reputation soon. He'll have a crush, go to prom,etc.

V 2 Comments
107 If your brain was donated to science, science would return it.

If someone needed a brain transplant and they were gonna give them yours the person would rather die a million times

With the person I'm planning to use this on definitely! But of course they would never donate anything to anyone.

If someone annoys me in science class and they really offended me I would use this

good one - waldo

V 10 Comments
108 Easy on the make-up, girl. I've seen clowns that look more natural than you.

Another joke is " easy on the make up there, you look like a warrior going to battle.

Lol. Really like this one!

Good one


109 Don't hate me because I'm beautiful, hate me because your boyfriend thinks so

Hate your boyfriend for thinking so


110 Do you know how old i am? Oh wait i forgot, you dont know how to count!

Don't need to count to know age oh wait I forgot you can't read.

To be honest I like this joke, but if the person has dyslexia, don't use this one on that person unless if they don't think it's offensive.

Someone basically wrote one like this

I told that to a boy everyone said oooh because it was a good one they loved the joke

V 3 Comments
111 If I throw a stick, will you go away?

I've heard this one and I like it

I like that one

That bad


V 1 Comment
112 Ahhhhhhhhhh! It's Leatherface! Oh no wait it's you.

Spooky yet cool

113 You were born in A&E.

This is a horrible insult...

I don't understand

Don't get it.

This sucks

V 1 Comment
114 Wow, I'm so sorry, iļ»æ wish I could have helped you when that lion clawed your face to pieces, what, it didn't, I was gonna say, even a lion couldn't have done something as bad as that.

I would say this to a person and she would cry so bad she wet her pants all the way up her mother

To bad 5 years later a lion got killed by his ugliness

This should be #1


V 1 Comment
115 You're so fat that when you walked past our window you blocked out all the light for a month.

I said this to my teacher I got kicked out of class

Dang that's lit!

116 Yeah you're pretty ... pretty stupid

Haha.. Made me remember my boyfriend's ex!

its funny a friend of mine keeps saying am I pretty now I know what to tell her

LOL! I will use this in my enemy. Whoever came up with this, they are a genius!


V 12 Comments
117 I may be fat, but you're ugly, and I can diet.

Oh my god! I love this and I am so totally gonna use it!

That is pretty dang awesome! A fantastic insult! I love this! Totally going to use it! didn't expect somethign to be this good, but it was completly awesome!

Winston Churchill said something like this... I think it was 'I may be drunk and rude madam, but in the morning I will be sober and you will still be ugly'. Really good insult if someone obnoxious is sensitive about their looks

Another one, think it was Churchill too. A pretty woman approached him and said, "We should make love because with my looks and your brains we would have perfect children". He replied, "But what if they have my looks and your brains? " Genius!

This would be good for people being bullied because of their size. - FluffyBanana

V 22 Comments
118 You're so stupid, brain surgeons are having a hard time

Brain surgeon 1: SCREW THIS! *flips patient and leaves room. Brain Surgeon 2:...

I know a few people who deserve to receive this insult - Nerdface2000

Haha can't wait to say this one.

I'm dead.

V 2 Comments
119 You're so hairy you look like you have Bigfoot in a head lock

I heard it as, that girls bush is so thick it looked like she has buckwheat in a leg lock.

... Oh my God, that was just overkill. Still can't stop laughing. Laugh out loud

Good one to say to girls

My entire family laughed when I said it to my sister

V 7 Comments
120 If I had a penny for every brain cell you have I'd be broke.

If I lost a penny for every brain cell you should have but don't, I would be in more debt than Kanye.

This was copy and pasted, just like you were copied and pasted from a trash can. - dumbo

Honestly- I use this every time ma bro just Tries to insult

Best one all day

V 6 Comments
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List Stats

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Top Remixes (128)

1. You must have been born on a highway, because that's where most accidents happen.
2. Your family tree is a cactus, because everybody on it is a prick.
3. Hey, you have something on your chin...3rd one down.
1. Your family tree is a cactus, because everybody on it is a prick.
2. Hey, you have something on your chin...3rd one down.
3. Yo mama so fat she's got more chins than a Chinese phone book.
1. Shut up, you'll never be the man your mother is.
2. You're like STDs, nobody wants you, everyone hates you and it proves your parents should have used protection.
3. I would ask how old you are, but I know you can't count that high.

View All 128


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