Best Insults

heather

The Contenders: Page 7

121 You're like the universe, constantly expanding.

Bigger, bigger, woah you're so... Oh wait that's just you're flab

This is tight yo!

I just found this so funny I'm still laughing now

rubbish

V 6 Comments
122 Your house; what happend to it? Was there a stampede of crapping zebras through this dump?

Your so fat dora can't even explore you

It is called explosive diarrhea

This is the funniest one

This is awesome!

V 2 Comments
123 Every time I look at you, I get 5 wrinkles

Comeback: Oh that's what Happend to your Face...
Or something like that, just re-word it

The animal abuse one was already posted genius

Wicked insult I'm definitely gonna use it

I can't wait to use it on my friends it cracked me up

V 7 Comments
124 You have a face only a mother could love

That is a compliment

I'm so using this on some blue whale

Lmfao! That's a good one!

LOL IMMA USE THIS ONE ON MY ENIMIES

V 6 Comments
125 If you were a million times smarter you would be dumber than an ant

Your ass is so big it covers the whole universe

Even a stupid dumb person would be smarter than you

If you were 7.4 billion times smarter you'd be a chimpanzee

This, this is wonderful

V 7 Comments
126 I read your story. I could pull a better plot out of my dead grandmother's butt.

This is really good but I hate it so much that the number of it should be my phone number.

Perfect for my classmates that are so terrible at writing stories.

That's so offensive in so many ways...BUT SO FUNNY

Use this on Wattpad. It's great for troll stories!

V 2 Comments
127 Poopyhead

This is for kindergarteners

I tried this on my 15 year old brother. He didn't find it offensive just like I thought

I always used this on my annoying big brother when we were little IT NEVER GETS OLD I STILL USE IT!

Hey poopy head you're um day

V 31 Comments
128 My cancer just got cured! Thanks to your ugliness, Chuck Norris cried, and his tears touched me and cured my cancer!

A guy once tried to insult me by saying: piranas will eat your fins and devour your nose. what?!

This has to be like in the top 20

what

ASS WIPES they might not ever cure cancer BITCHES

V 4 Comments
129 Nice tan, orange is my favourite colour

Too funny there's this girl in my class and we hate each other I also bitchslapped her. Anyway she wears so much bronzer she looks orange this will work perfectly on her.

There's a fine line between tan and looking like you rolled in Doritos!

"you must be so rich in Vitamin C, that you looks so Orange! On your skin tone...

Carrots have far more vitamin A, so it will be vitamin A instead - Harri666

color*

V 12 Comments
130 Have you been to the mall lately? They're selling lives, you should get one.

People that try to argue with me have no life because they know I have always got something better to do...nim gonna use this one!

Classic insult I would use this to insult my enemy.

I would certainly say this to a boy who dares being rude to my crush

Gona use this on James he's a loner and has no life and is a fatass and an ugly ass and a big mouth

V 8 Comments
131 The closest thing you could get to a girlfriend is a disabled donkey.

But donkeys are related to horses and horses are awesome

... Good one. Good one

So good I said it to my bullie and then we had a fight and he got suspended

Us in saying this to my friend 😎

132 If you have something to say, raise your hand and place it over your mouth. Alright?

Lmao So funny

133 Some people are just dumb. Take you for example!

This is so going to hurt somebody's feelings

Wow good job clap clap clap

This has to be the worst insult here.

...wow.

134 Can I take a picture of you? I want to prove to my family that trolls exist.
135 You are so ugly when you were born the doctor said I'm gonna drop it, if it falls is a rat, if it flies is a bat.

Awesome! This one's gonna hurt.. But look at the bright side I guess this one's going to blow your enemy away.

That one is great! I said it to my friend who was severely premature, she slapped me.

I have a rat and there's a bat living in my shed. I don't like this one it's basically insulting rats and bats

Loooll, that's amazing! I've GOT to use that sometime.

V 10 Comments
136 Yo mama is so fat, when she goes to an all you can eat buffet, they have to install speed bumps

I have used this one plenty of times an its just as funny every time laugh out loud

Pretty good. I can just picture this woman running down to the buffet, knocking all these people out of her way.

Best one why is this not number one best joke I've heard in my life

Lmfao, that took me about 2 seconds of staring dumbly at the screen before cracking up

V 4 Comments
137 Your mum is so stupid she needed to get home with the 44 bus so she took the 22 one twice

Awesome joke! I've never heard anything that original! Keep up the good work!

That's awesome! Honest! If I said that to someone they would be speechless because its hard to think what to say it's so good! Well done to you! You deserve to win!

This is honestly the best one yet

Awesome joke I will use this so much

V 7 Comments
138 I saw you in a junkyard yesterday and told you to go home but you just stayed there

But... I saw a cow there is it you?

I am very thankful because of your hep

And if they say they weren't at a junkyard, tell them you mistook them for a hippo

I saw you on T.V. yesterday you were featured on animal planet - XXXBXXX

V 4 Comments
139 What died on your neck? Oh, it's your head

Definitely saying this to my English teacher!

That line is perfect for my ex boyfriend.

Perfect I'm saying this to a guy in school

Wow! I feel sorry for the next guy that hears that.

V 6 Comments
140 You're so lonely your wheelie bins go out more then you

Yeah there more important than my enemies

I +1 the guy's comment who said he beat his enemy

I said that to my worst east enemy then beated him till he started bleeding, then he started crying. So fuunny laugh out loud

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2,601 listings
12 years, 6 days old

Top Remixes (128)

1. You must have been born on a highway, because that's where most accidents happen.
2. Your family tree is a cactus, because everybody on it is a prick.
3. Hey, you have something on your chin...3rd one down.
PositronWildhawk
1. Your family tree is a cactus, because everybody on it is a prick.
2. Hey, you have something on your chin...3rd one down.
3. Yo mama so fat she's got more chins than a Chinese phone book.
Elvisjackson
1. Shut up, you'll never be the man your mother is.
2. You're like STDs, nobody wants you, everyone hates you and it proves your parents should have used protection.
3. I would ask how old you are, but I know you can't count that high.
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Yo mamma jokes
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