Best Insults


The Contenders: Page 9

161 Your teeth are so yellow traffic slows down when you smile

Your teeth are so rotten when you smile the traffic goes faster and no one gets a chance to cross

So cool, I'll use it on my 7 year old brother he seriously needs to brush his teeth.
THANKS for the insult.

That's peek seriously that's funny trust me I'm gonna use this on a monkey shagger called Katy because her teeth are quite yellow


V 24 Comments
162 Being around you is like having a cancer of the soul.

Oh my god, this is so hurtful laugh out loud
I'm definitely using this for sure

That's horrible

Awesome joke! Ignore the haters who say cancer is bad!

No...don't joke about cancer that is horrible. You don't know what cancer is like, you've never had it, becuase if you did you would never want someone else to experience the same torture as you had been through. Dislike from me.

163 Yo momma is like a racecar driver. She burns lots of rubbers!

Staler than my grandmother's bread

My mom's a racecar driver. SO that's why I didn't like this one.. So sad... But it's a good one even thought my situation.

V 3 Comments
164 You're so fat when you burped you blew the world away.

The reason why it isn't higher on the list is because, only a dumbass would find this funny...

Only a retarded 8 year old kid would find this "insult" funny

This is just...retarded


V 4 Comments
165 Hey, unless your name is Google, stop acting like you know everything.

So cool I like it because I've just heard it also the ones I've heard are in here and I've used them and the person I say them to their mouth is shut

Ok this is good. who is with me? I'll definitely use this on my know it all friend!

Even Google doesn't know everything. I would've said: Unless your name is God, stop acting like you know everything.

This is so good um totes using this in a bitch at school

V 18 Comments
166 My mother is more of a man then you. And she's a woman..

Take off the 'And she's a woman.. ' part, it makes sound stupid

This is more of a diss to yourself than to others (because of the "And she's a woman" part)

Hmm, oh the irony if the person was a he-she. Awkward...

This is stupid

V 11 Comments
167 You're so poor that hobos think their rich

You're so poor that you hang used toilet paper on the line to dry so you can use them again!

This is going to be said when I get to school

Laugh out loud... This one is classic... Xp


V 3 Comments
168 You so ugly your mom thought you were an octopus

Dude that's not funny

Octopi can actually tell your health condition just by wrapping their tentacle around your arm. They are pretty creatures, and don't deserve you saying this about them.

LAME INSULT. Here's a better one: When you were born, people tried to put you in a mousetrap because they thought you were a RAT! (Still lame but better than the octopus one)

Octopi are interesting and graceful sea creatures. This is a huge insult to octopi.

V 13 Comments
169 How much does your sister cost?

This again, puts women down which is just awful. How much would it cost for you to go buy some manners.

Insulting someone's sister is not good

How much does your life cost.A quarter of a penny would be way too expensive.

That is just rude and I'm a man

V 18 Comments
170 Stupid, pathetic worm.

Whoever wrote this doesn't have a life.

I'm just saying, come on! As I get further down this list my faith in humanity dwindles and diminishes even further than it already has, and this is not helping

Really not funny should be the very last one

This is so retarded it made me laugh

V 13 Comments
171 take your mask off Halloween is not until October

LOL! If I were to end that, I would try touching their face and peel it off and then say "this isn't a mask? Feel sorry for you, your sibling must of superglued it on you when you were still young. At least your parents don't have to spend much money on your Halloween costume every year! " Sorry it's a bit long, but I think I improved it a bit!

I think this is so stupid like your mom chasing after the garbage truck for food

Laugh out loud I say this 2 this boy in school and so takes a rage

Lol there is this girl who is so ugly and revolting her name is baily and wait till I say it to her

V 3 Comments
172 Your mom sent you back to the hospital for a refund.

Why is this not in the top ten! I finally got my bully to shut up when I said this!

Haha that betch must be ugly as hell

Ha! this is funny


V 3 Comments
173 You know, your mom is a big liar. She said that she never makes the same mistake twice... then you brother was born

Mom: How do you make a tissue dance? Put a little boogie in it.
Son: Mom, no, you can't make jokes.
Mom: I made you.

When I saw this... Words can't even explain how much I laughed.

O my god read the comment before me

Awesome insult hahaahah made me laugh so hard almost peed my pants


174 If you were half as funny as you think you are, you would be twice as funny as you are.

Some people would probably have a tough time understanding this one, but it's actually really funny.

This is great! It confuses them at first but then they realize what you said but by then you've walked away.

Yeah I don't understand that one

I've heard better

V 3 Comments
175 You are the greatest accident mother nature has ever encountered V 3 Comments
176 If brains were made of gold, you and your family would be beggars.

How mean! This joke is for 1 person not he whole family. I find it very insulting! Well I really want to make this omment good, so don't use this insult. My bff used it on a boy and he cried like a lot!

If I had a dollar for every time you opened your mouth, I'd be Donald Trump

Triple insult


177 God made Coke, god made Pepsi, god made me, oh so sexy, god make rivers, god made lakes, god made you... oh we all make mistakes

LMFAO SO MUCH! Totally gonna use this

That is offending God, but it was for a funny purpose. LOL!

I highly doubt god exists so the dumb Christian down there at the bottom can stop trying to cram his or her religion down others throats

Love this one. It should be number 1

V 22 Comments
178 Can I borrow your face for Halloween?

So simple, but so AMAZING!

179 Yep I am adopted, my parents chose me, your parents are stuck with you.

This is sooo coool

180 You only annoy me when you're breathing.

Oh come on!? No one else voted for this?

Used this on a noob on ROBLOX... He left afterwards

Haha! Used this when someone asked how do I annoy you? After I told him he was more irritating than teachers with stutters

Good one

V 70 Comments
PSearch List

Recommended Lists

Related Lists

Top 10 Funniest Insults WWE Superstars With the Lamest Jokes / Insults Greatest Movie Insults Top 10 British Insults Best Insults Coined by Beavis and Butt-head

List StatsUpdated 24 Sep 2017

70,000 votes
2,592 listings
11 years, 313 days old

Top Remixes (127)

1. You must have been born on a highway, because that's where most accidents happen.
2. Your family tree is a cactus, because everybody on it is a prick.
3. Hey, you have something on your chin...3rd one down.
1. Your family tree is a cactus, because everybody on it is a prick.
2. Hey, you have something on your chin...3rd one down.
3. Yo mama so fat she's got more chins than a Chinese phone book.
1. Shut up, you'll never be the man your mother is.
2. You're like STDs, nobody wants you, everyone hates you and it proves your parents should have used protection.
3. I would ask how old you are, but I know you can't count that high.

View All 127


Yo mamma jokes
Add Post

Error Reporting

See a factual error in these listings? Report it here.