Best Lies Parents Tell Their KidsDon't you love the lies we tell our kids! I do. Here are some of my favorites that I was told in my youth.
The Top Ten
The sweetest of dreams! A benevolent white-bearded man coming down the chimney - we left cookies and carrots for him and his reindeer. My older sister and I felt like we were the last ones in school to find out the truth; my younger sister felt the burden of keeping the charade alive. I'm 42 and we still get presents from St. Nick. A beautiful lie! (I include the Easter Bunny, the Tooth Fairy, and all the other wonderful make-believe figments of society's imagination.
Saint Nicholas is real, but he ded and he's not the one we imagined. He doesn't look like we think he does (I think he was actually pretty skinny), he didn't come down chimneys, he didn't watch you, he didn't give presents to only the nice people, he gave them to the ones who were struggling in life: financially, etc, etc. - Evant
Same thing here. My parents still expect me to believe even though I already know. Now it's up to me to act like a 4 year old about Santa cause I'm the youngest. - notyetsaved
When my mom finally told me the truth about Santa being made up it BROKE MY HEART. So then I went on a rampage with their religion of Christianity and found out it was fake and all lies as well! So then I was like; “YOU GUYS LIED TO ME ABOUT ALL OF THIS FOR MY ENTIRE LIFE!? DO YOU KNOW HOW MUCH AGONY I AM NOW IN BECAUSE OF YOU GUYS DOING THIS TO ME!? TO HELL WITH YOU!V 2 Comments
Right! That's how come Cathy got a car and I didn't.
So one child is loved and the others are hated - mayamanga
Maybe to my dad but my mum likes my sister a LOT more. - KingFab
Haha, I don't know why parents even bother saying this. Newsflash: Kids know when you favor a kid.
I thought this was true until about ten seconds ago! Well I feel stupid...
I Heard that In Grand Theft Auto 5 While Hearing Ron Talking About That On His Radio Show BCR Commity Hour - topbesttopworst
My Uncle Mike told me this one! It worked. I was deathly afraid of embarrassing myself - even the slightest urge had me scampering out of the water to the bathroom. Brilliant! I've told it a few times myself.
There wouldn't be enough sun, soil, water, etc. for the seed to grow. Plus, how would the seed germinate inside a stomach? - Evant
I won a watermelon eating contest at Pizmo Beach in the summer of '77 and I must have swallowed a thousand of them - No Tree!
Well this one is sort of true but I don't think you need to wait that long. Exercising immediately after eating can cause some problems, though, because when you exercise the blood flow is diverted away from the digestive system to the muscles that need the energy so that you don't get tired too easily. But really you don't need to wait an hour. I normally don't exert myself too much when I swim anyway.
Whenever the ice cream truck comes when I'm at the pool, after I finish it off I go back in the water - mayamanga
Chalk this one up to ignorance. Just parents repeating the same crap their parents told them. Somebody must stop the cycle of BS. - although I do remember a particularly harsh burpy swim practice after downing a whole pizza.
Pure parental bull crap! I should have asked dad to show me his medical degree. Lucky for him it was pre-Google. Would have loved to call him out on that one!
Found that one out the hard way!
What? Not unless a razor is sticking out of my butt!
Everyone just assumes God loves them and they're going to heaven. And then they tell their kids that. They don't even bother to read what the Bible says about it.
Aka fatality - Maddox121
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6 years, 173 days old