Most Bizarre Things to Do When You Think You're About to Be Attacked

Britgirl
Jump to conclusions much? You catch a man looking at you. He must be up to no good. What are you gonna do?

The Top Ten

1 Whip a cucumber from your clutch bag and wave it around screaming "I'M NOT AFRAID TO USE THIS, YOU KNOW!"


Now this would be something worth seeing. A cucumber from a CLUTCH BAG?! It makes you wonder what it was doing in there in the first place. . . - Britgirl

2 Scream blue murder at the unsuspecting and stunned elderly gentleman who has just sat next to you

That old man's teeth would fall out of his head.

3 Rip your blouse open to save the innocent male passer-by from doing it first
4 Run into the nearest shop, steal the first thing you can lay your hands on and threaten the poor man with a packet of Love Hearts
5 Tell anyone who's listening that the dirty old man behind you is clocking your rear end and you won't stand for it!
6 Grab the man, and scream at him that you are making a citizen's arrest and not to struggle
7 As a man innocently opens his coat, scream at his southern regions and have up before the small claims court in double-quick time


Yes. . .This might be a little premature methinks. - Britgirl

8 Scream "RAPE!" when a Tube passenger accidentally brushes against you, causing mass panic and the train to come to a grinding halt

Never mind the innocent chap; this would just be worth seeing for a laugh! - Britgirl

It might happen, or you might look stupid. - PositronWildhawk

9 Attack him first

Laugh out loud! That man would wonder what hit him - literally.


Can you imagine, running up behind him, screaming like a woman possessed and burying your nails into the rolls of his neck-fat! Priceless! - Britgirl

10 Shoot the first man who smiles at you - you don't trust a smiling man, especially on a day ending in a 'Y'

No jumping to conclusions then. - Britgirl

OK. I'm not going to say anything. Just. OK. - PositronWildhawk

The Contenders

11 Start dancing
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List Stats

11 listings
4 years, 336 days old

Top Remixes

1. Whip a cucumber from your clutch bag and wave it around screaming "I'M NOT AFRAID TO USE THIS, YOU KNOW!"
2. Scream blue murder at the unsuspecting and stunned elderly gentleman who has just sat next to you
3. Rip your blouse open to save the innocent male passer-by from doing it first
Britgirl

WRemix

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