Top Ten Common Oxymorons that Make You Groan Most

Oxymoron is a term used to describe a word (or two) which means something common but in which two parts of the word contradict each other. Sadly, we use these a lot in common speech, and some of them, when you think about it, are enough to make you groan. Enjoy!
The Top Ten
1 Civil War

Civil War. Wow. This is ridiculous. Civil means courteous and polite, even peaceful. Is war peaceful? Definitely not. These two words are used to describe a war in which the two sides are two different groups from the same country or origin, but when you think about it, it means "peaceful and polite war". Think of the American Civil War. The American casualties in that were more than in both the world wars combined, so it doesn't seem very peaceful and polite, does it?

I think when they say Civil I think they mean civilian. In the Civil Wars, usually civilians are forced to take up arms.

2 Plastic Silverware

Of course, this makes sense to most people. It just means plastic forks and knives. But when you think about it, plastic and silverware completely contradict each other. While this may not be the worst, it's one of my favourites.

They should say plastic kitchen utensils.

3 Living Dead

"There are primarily dead, but this is not always the case. There are 2 main kinds, Undead and Infected. Undead zombies are created when a person dies then the virus jump starts the brain and nervous system some time after death, allowing the corpse to stand up and move. The virus also logically would activate sensory organs so the zombie can see. As the zombie is dead, nothing works besides the brain and it doesn't need any thing to stay "alive" (food air water etc). These also tend to require the brain to be destroyed to die again, so shoothing it in the chest a million times does nothing. They also tend to be slow and shambling as their muscles are dead and have no oxygen flow and the kind that is dumber (note I put emphasis on tend to, as this is not always the case, Undead in some series can go against tradition and die from damage to the body and be fast and cunning too)"

- Nelson Ricks, Quora

Living dead. Those are bare, bitter, opposites. This means zombies, but it makes no sense. If you are dead, you are dead. If you are living, you are living. There is no "living dead". Sadly, this is used commonly, even in movie titles.

When the dead becomes alive again.

4 Silent Scream

Silent scream is not as common as some of the other ones on here, but if you read fiction books a lot, you will be familiar with this term. Scream means a really loud screechy noise. Silent is the opposite of loud. Another embarrassing oxymoron, hurray!

Well this just means screaming under your breath.

5 Happy Monday

As Garfield puts it, the mother of all oxymorons. Even today (Monday) my English teacher said this to me and I said: "that's an oxymoron", which inspired the idea for this list.

This actually isn't an oxymoron but it's funny you put it on here

6 Old News

Thing about it. This means news, as it new events that are worthy of media attention, so old and news don't go together. We should call it olds. Even though that sounds terrible, it's better than old news!

Any concept of time is fake.

7 Oxymoron

You heard me right, oxymoron itself is an oxymoron. The word itself is derived from two Ancient Greek words, oxys, which means sharp, or smart, and moronos, which means stupid. Oxymoron, in Greek, therefore means smart-stupid. Definitely an oxymoron.

8 Dull Roar

No comment on this ridiculous one.

9 Negative Income

Income means an intake of money, something positive. Negative positive, in other words, is an oxymoron.

You earn an outcome instead (I know that doesn't actually work).

10 Working Vacation

Vacation literally means a break from work, and it has evolved to normally mean going to an exotic location. But if you take the old meaning, a break from work designated for working makes absolutely no sense. The two words completely contradict each other. Not my favourite, but I had to put it on here.

My mom does this all the time.

The Contenders
11 Deafening Silence
12 Pretty Ugly
BAdd New Item