Top 10 Disturbing Things for a Mall Santa to Do In Front of Kids

FladevousEniker
You know those mall Santa's? They could be pedophiles or murderers,
anyway but it wouldn't involve you right?

The Top Ten

1 Beat up security guards with hammer and sickle

No wonder Santa is a communist oh wait- - FladevousEniker

2 Rant on why his life sucks and his sexual lust on kids
3 Tell the kids that the "real" Santa is dead due to tripping over his beard and how he is a crooked criminal chased by the CIA

Hey did you see this man wearing a Santa suit? He is a murderer and a pedo y'know - FladevousEniker

4 Sacrifice kids by hanging them in his "Secret Funplace"

The right place for children to go! - FladevousEniker

5 Flirt with kids in an Arabic accent
6 Enslaving the kids parents by forcing them to work on making mind-controlling toys
7 Rip an antler off a Rudolf the Deer mannequin
8 Read out verses from the Old Testament with excessive profanity and attempts of persuasion on recruiting kids as child soldiers
9 Tell them to sit on his lap and perform sex moves
10 Tell them if he/she feels happy that the present was produced by enslaved kids from Africa

Lol. - TwilightKitsune

The Contenders

11 Take off his clothes and sing The Real Slim Shady in a Swedish death metal style
12 Beat Up Bugs Bunny
13 Launch a TOW missile
14 Pull out a knife
15 Twerk
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Related Lists

Top Ten Most Awkward Things That Little Kids Might Catch Santa Doing Top Ten Insanely Awkward Things to Say to a Kid While Dressed Up As Santa Claus Top Ten Ages Where Kids Stop Believing in Santa Clause Top 10 Most Random Things to Do at a Mall Top Ten Weird Things to Do When Walking Through a Shopping Mall

List Stats

15 listings
3 years, 129 days old

Top Remixes

1. Beat up security guards with hammer and sickle
2. Rant on why his life sucks and his sexual lust on kids
3. Tell the kids that the "real" Santa is dead due to tripping over his beard and how he is a crooked criminal chased by the CIA
FladevousEniker

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