Top Ten Dumbest Crimes of 2013 - 2014

Kiteretsunu
Crime has existed in our human society from ancient times. Some are silly. Some are violent. Some are cruel. Some done out of greed. But the crimes I'm going to list are so dumb in itself that you can't help but wonder; from where do these people learn such things.

The Top Ten

1 Violent naked pooping masturbating man terrorizes a nice Florida couple with his acts (source - The Huffington Post)

Oh please explain what he did with the vacuum cleaner; just so it's clear in my mind. I have no imagination whatsoever... - Britgirl

Well, he cleaned up all the mess he did in the house (thus mixed all that bad stuff together), I guess. - Kiteretsunu

Gregory Matthew Bruni terrorized a nice Florida couple, first by climbing naked on the roof of their home and then by pooping, masturbating and destroying property. Then he did something with the VACCUM CLEANER which should better be remained unexplained.
How can you get dumber than that! - Kiteretsunu

2 Restauranteur tells two armed food robbers to come back later after they threaten him. They followed his request and after returning, saw the police waiting for them. (source - The Huffington Post)

When Mario Garcia, 39, and Domingo Garcia, 28, entered the Chicago's Clifton Grill, demanding food and telling the owner, "I will kill you, I have a gun with me," the concerned restauranter requested that the pair come back later. And when they did, the police was waiting for them. - Kiteretsunu

3 Rosie Pate, grandmother, allegedly calls 911, to ask for beer (source - The Huffington Post)

A grandmother in Memphis was jailed after officials said she called 911 for POLICE ASSISTANCE IN GETTING BEER.
The grandma had slapped her granddaughter because she wouldn't buy grandma a beer.
Well, Grandma, now you know that unnecessary calls to 911 can be dangerous! - Kiteretsunu

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4 Female bank robber returns for 2nd heist at same Texas bank location; tells employees, "I'm back!" (source - The Huffington Post)

Bank Robbers, like lightning, usually don't strike the same place twice.
But in Kingwood, Texas, a female bank robber has allegedly held up the Woodfoest National Bank inside the Walmart twice in one month.
She did her first robbery on Jan 6, when she demanded cash from employees.
But on second arrival as a robber, she greeted the employees with "I'm back! " - Kiteretsunu

5 Michael Antonio Long, accused of ordering pizza and robbing the delivery driver (source - The Huffington Post)

Typically, criminals leave their home in order to commit crime.
But this alleged robber preferred to have his victim come to him-------and that caused his downfall.
Michael Antonio Long, 20, was arrested on Thursday, for alleged robbing a pizza delivery driver, who came to deliver two pies.
When the driver came, Long and his companions robbed the man of all money, his wallet and THE TWO PIZZAS HE WAS CARRYING!
Call about stupidity, they let the driver go, and the driver reported them to the police. - Kiteretsunu

6 Vincent Wade crashes his car, gets naked and plays with himself on the street (source - The Huffington Post)

Vincent J. Wade, a 34 year old Jersey man, allegedly got wasted and crashed his car into Pennsylvania Crown Fried Chicken.
After the accident, the male operator exited the vehicle and began removing his clothing and yelling. He then attempted to drive off; however, someone was able to remove keys and hold him until the police came. - Kiteretsunu

7 Stupid kid blames Grand Theft Auto for dumb crime (source - Games Radar)

This boy stole his parents' car and drove into a parked van one block away.
When the police asked for the reason for such bizarre act, his parents blamed it on Grand Theft Auto for the violence the game shows during the gameplay. - Kiteretsunu

8 Guy does with his car after being naked (source - The Huffington Post)
9 Man bites off neighbour's penis for having Xbox on too loud (source: Metro)

Yes, I saw this, and I remember it saying that the man was taken to court and the judge questioned whether he was massaging it as he bit it off. I am not lying. - PositronWildhawk

10 Timothy David Hershman gets 18 months for drunk dialing to FBI with fake hijacking threat (source - The Huffington Post)

Hershman was drunk when he called the FBI saying another man was going to hijack an Alaskan Airlines flight. - Kiteretsunu

The Contenders

11 Teenager's mum tells him to rob his foster parents in Facebook message (source - Sunderland Echoes)
12 A man jokingly tells TSA at the airport that his friend had a bomb (source: NBC South Florida)
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List StatsUpdated 22 Sep 2017

12 listings
3 years, 236 days old

Top Remixes

1. Violent naked pooping masturbating man terrorizes a nice Florida couple with his acts (source - The Huffington Post)
2. Restauranteur tells two armed food robbers to come back later after they threaten him. They followed his request and after returning, saw the police waiting for them. (source - The Huffington Post)
3. Rosie Pate, grandmother, allegedly calls 911, to ask for beer (source - The Huffington Post)
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