The Conquest: Episode 4
Turkeyasylum Finch: Last time on The Conquest, with our budget extremely low, we were desperate to come up with a fun challenge! So, we tried to make one with rocks, and it turned out very well! And while the points system was in full swing, The Breadwinners lost. Again. So, Letdot-Crew Member: Hey Finch, you're fired.
Finch: Why?
Crew Member: Your pitiful hosting skills made our viewers go down. WAY down.
Finch: Wouldn't it help if we moved our show away from the 1:00 AM time slot?
Crew Member: It's 8:00 in Hawaii there!
Finch: But-
Crew Member: I don't care, you're fired now! Get out! Anyway, who will argue? Who will make the show actually fun to watch? Find out now on The Conquest!
(At some corrupted country)
Letsdot52: Yay! I got mail! And a note: Tested for uh, Melinda, could you read this word?
Melinda: Rabies.
Letsdot52: It says it for Letdot52. Well, that isn't me... and this is our dinner for the night!
(Back at the 70's trailers of The Conquest)
Garythesnail: I got a good night's sleep! I'm ready for the challenge!
Kiteretsunu: Uh... it's 5:00 AM.
Garythesnail: You couldn't have let me bask in the glories of sleep for a little longer?
Kiteretsunu: Hm?
Garythesnail: Never mind...
(Confession)CartoonsGirl: I am deprived of sleep, we have lost 2 team members, I am hungry, but nothing, I repeat nothing can break me!
JaysTop10List: How will we ever win?
Toptensjackson1 (In mischevious voice): I guess someone jas been up to something...
OtakuGamergirl: Yeah, you have been up to something!
Toptensjackson1 (In questionable voice): What? What are you talking about?
OtakuGamergirl: I'm talking about us losing TWICE in a row!
(Confession)OtakuGamergirl: I have had it with Toptensjackson1! He's a fraud, a coward, and a total (Bleep)!
Britboy: Wow, Britgirl! I love your shirt today! It really brings out your eyes!
Britgirl: Gee, thanks.
SevenLizards: Let's win and escape elimination again!
Alexcousins: So far, I think The Breadwinners kind of resemble Team Victory, and let's keep it that way! Their loss is our safety, right?
Simpsondude: So, who do you think will win today?
SuperHyperdude: Hopefully us.
Everyone on Team Britgirl Is Super Hot: I agree.
CerealGuy: Hello! I am CerealGuy, and I'm your host since Finch was fired for having a boring challenge! And my challenge will be Fun!
HezarioSeth: Finally! Something fun!
CerealGuy: You didn't let me finish! Fun for the viewers!
Cazaam: Aw, come on!
SelfDestruct: But we've gone through a lot!
CerealGuy: That's why we are giving you other 2 teams shacks!
Andre56: Let me guess? For some ruin porn photography?
Britboy: That sounds nice...
CerealGuy: No. For you guys to sleep in. Turns out the 70's trailers you had may have had some asbestos in them.
PositronWildhawk: I don t really want to know what "ruin porn" is.
Keyson: It's not as bad as it sounds. It's just pictures of abandoned buildings.
Britgirl: Maybe it should undergo a name change...
Keyson: It really should.
CerealGuy: Your challenge is a game I like to call"Screw Your Neighbor"!
Britboy: Good thing Britgirl is a neighbor of mine.
BlueDiamondFromNowhere: Um, wrong meaning...
CerealGuy: The challenge is where you must grab another team's flag, and return it to your base! Keep in mind, each team has just 1 flag, and a flag in anither team's base stays in that base. Last team to collect another team's flag and send it to their base loses! Once we get arranged, we will begin!
(All teams arranged)
CerealGuy: Ready... set... begin!
(Andre56 runs, then hits a glass wall)
Andre56: Ouch!
SuperHyperdude: I'm not even gonna ask what you did. I will just continue on...
(SuperHyperdude hits the wall, too)
CerealGuy: Oh yeah, there's a glass wall between each boundary!
Kiteretsunu: Gotcha Hezario!
HezarioSeth: Come on! Now I have to go to jail!
CerealGuy: Actually, there is NO jail. HezarioSeth will just be eliminated from the rest of the challenge.
HezarioSeth: Can I borrow yoir laptop while I sit out? I just want to see Mark Zuckenburg's account for a little.
CerealGuy: I don't have a laptop.
HezarioSeth: How did you get on TheTopTens then?
CerealGuy: The power of the number 10.
JaysTop10List: Crap! I got out!
CartoonsGirl: Don't worry, I'm out, too!
Toptensjackson1: Same here.
CartoonsGirl: It's all down to OtakuGam-
Toptensjackson1: Never mention that beast's name. Ever.
CartoonsGirl: ...
PositronWildhawk: That stupid SelfDestruct used me as a human shield. That stupid SelfDestruct.
Cazaam: He did that to me, too! When will he literally self destruct?
Andre56: I hit another glass wall, and Funnyuser caught me! A frickin' 11 year old caught me!
Username34: I got The Breadwinners' flag!
SelfDestruct: Nice job! Now can you say I got the flag? If you don't, you will be out of the alliance.
Username34: Sure! Anything for you!
Username34: Hey CerealGuy! SelfDestruct got the flag!
CerealGuy: Team Didney Worl already won!
Keyson: Their flag will be wide open...
Britboy: Their flag will be wide open...
(The two are at the flag, fighting over it)
(Confession)Britboy: Getting the flag will help me win over the eighth wonder of the world... Britgirl.
Britboy: My hands! They're slipping!
Keyson: I got it!
Britboy: No!
Keyson: Did you have to tag me right now Alexcousins?
Alexcousins: Remember, this is a game. We are all here to win, including me.
Britboy: Great. Will you give me the flag?
Alexcousins: No. I want to prove myself to the team.
Britboy: Fine...
Alexcousins: Hey guys! I gkt the flag!
Simpsondude: Nice job!
SevenLizards: YES!
CerealGuy: And now, Team Britgirl Is Super Hot gets second place!
SuperHuperdude: At least we won't send anyone home!
PositronWildhawk: Hey, you, CerealGuy, remember when we won the challenge? What's our reward?
CerealGuy: You guys will win a vacation to, the beautiful Upper Penninsula of Michigan! While you're there, you will be dropped off in the woods, trying to survive in there for a week, with nothing to eat but berries, and no clothes except for your average summer clothes! Also, as a bonus, you may also get to experience the tons of snow that peop-
Cazaam: Can't we just have a nice dinner or something?
CerealGuy: OK then, your loss.
Cazaam- Beats starving for a week.
HezarioSeth- Yes, yes it does.
Keyson: Yay! Now their flag will be open!
OtakuGamergirl: Sorry man, beat you to it.
Keyson: Crap, you're a fast runner!
OtakuGamergirl: Wow! I didn't even know that myself!
CerealGuy: And The Breadwinners get third, which means Team Potato Block gets dead last! Now for the points standings:
The Breadwinners: 60
Team Didney Worl- 100
Team Britgirl Is Super Hot- 90
Team Potato Block- 80
So, Breadwinners, what do you think of being in elimination AGAIN?
Toptensjackson1: OtakuGamergirl didn't go for the right flags!
OtakuGamergirl: Uh, at least I put something called EFFORT into the challenge.
(Confession)JaysTop10List: I don't know who to vote this time.
(Confession)OtakuGamergirl: I am very upset with the bully and fraud Toptensjackson1 is! He will get it someday, maybe even today!
(At the dinner)
PositronWildhawk: Wow! This food is good!
SelfDestruct: What you got proves the taste you have in food is even worse that your taste in music! Deadmau5? Moby? Really?
PositronWildhawk: At least I'm not a low-life, teenybopper like you!
SelfDestruct: Oh! It's on!
(Directly to the camera)Cazaam: Yet this was supposed to be a friendly dinner...
(Confession)HezarioSeth: During the dinner, a few good things happened. First of all, we got some actual, edible food to eat, and I snuck into the kitchen and hacked into the entire restaurant's wi-fi system! Let me just say, it was a fun day...
(At the dining lodge ay camp)
Garythesnail: Anyone notice the food keeps getting worse? Uesterday, we had "pork" for breakfast, and today, this seems kinda like the slop the contestants on Total Drama get fed.
Alexcousins: I see where you're coming from.
Server (Also known as BigBrotherYESTotalDramaNO): I also have the recipe for the Have-Not's slop on Big Brother. Want me to make that for you instead?
BlueDiamondFromNowhere: NO!
Funnyuser: I agree. Don't feed us that slop!
(At the elimination)
CerealGuy: Today's prize for immunity is well-suited for your team name... ducks! So, if you're safe, I'll pass out either Mr. Buhdeuce, SwaySway Guy, or... this other duck. But first, since I like to make this show fun (and that our ratings are low), I will add something to it. Here on this wheel, we have 3 different types of spaces: Regular elimination, reverse elimination, and Double elimination!
Toptensjackson1: Can you just spin it?! I want to go to bed!
CerealGuy: Fine!
(Spins the spinner)
CerealGuy: And the result... the reverse elimination! The person who got the least votes will be going home! So, now to pass out ducks!
(Confession)CartoonsGirl: I hope I don't go with this reverse elimination!
CerealGuy: Toptensjackson1 is safe with 2 votes against him!
Toptensjackson1: Uh, thanks, I guess...
CerealGuy: OtakuGamergirl is safe with 1 vote against her!
Toptensjackson1: You... YOU!
OtakuGamergirl: I guess that vote did come in handy!
CerealGuy: And the last one safe is...
Toptensjackson1: I'm tired, just tell me already!
CerealGuy: You ruined the intensity! JaysTop10List is safe with 1 vote against him!
JaysTop10List: You know what they say, if you can't make fun of yourself, don't make fun of others!
CartoonsGirl: That stupid wheel!
OtakuGamergirl: Don't worry CartoonsGirl, I will avenge the wheel and sieze the day!
CartoonsGirl: Yeah! Go sieze the day!
(CartoonsGirl leaves, while CerealGuy invites everyone over for a meeting)
Toptensjackson1: What now?
OtakuGamergirl: Is Toptensjackson1 the fraud finally leaving?
Wolftail: Come on! Why are we here?
CerealGuy: We have an announcement: The Bread-
Toptensjackson1: Let me go to bed now!
CerealGuy: In a sec... this is important. Anyway, The Breadwinners have gotten so small, I have decided to have the other teams absorb them! The team wth the most points, Team Didney Worl, you guys can have first dibs on members!
Andre56: Can we pick JaysTop10List? He seems like a cool cat!
SuoerHyperdude: I thought he hated you...
Andre56: It's an expression!
CerealGuy: Team Britgirl Is Super Hot, your guys' turn!
Everyone: OtakuGamergirl!
OtakuGamergirl: Thanks!
Britboy: Your body is almost as beautiful as Britgirl's... mmm...
CerealGuy: So, Team Potato Block gets Toptensjackson1!
Wolftail: Joy...
CerealGuy: So, that wraps up the episode! Stay tuned next time for The Conquest! Hopefully hosted by me!
Comments
Nice episode - JaysTop10List
I like how you turn me to be the host - CerealGuy