The Top Ten Family Guy Quotes

The Contenders: Page 3

41 You can't be ugly and play hard to get, it doesn't work that way. You're already hard to want! - Peter Griffin

My day just went from alright to fantastic, how he comes up with this stuff

This is by far the best quote could have used this line so many times

This one is true


V 4 Comments
42 Been working on that novel huh? Been working on that for three years now right? Gonna, gonna get that done? You know that novel, that novel you where making where friends become enemies and enemies become friends. You gonna get that done right? -Stewie

This was suppose to be number one.. I love this, and the face stewie makes when he says it.. Haha

Most definitely one of my favorite episodes ever!

43 Is this about Meg's cervical cancer? - Peter Griffin
44 Those freakin elves man, they came outta the trees, they just came outta the trees man - Snap to Pop and Crackle after they got jumped by the Keebler gang
45 Shut up, Meg - Peter Griffin

This was one of the best family guy moments ever, when peter goes feral and meg "saves" him

46 Baba Booey! Baba Booey! Howard Stern's penis! - Peter Griffin

Oh my god peter has nevr been that immature has he? Who'd he say it to anyway

47 Hey there, you like popscicles? I got a whole cellar full of popscicles. - Herbert the Pervert

Should be number one comes up in every family guy conversation I've ever had

Say this all the time should be higher up... Along with saying stroke stroke stroke

Funniest Family Guy quote ever. Makes me laugh whenever I hear it and hear Hebert's lisp

48 Nothing says Obey Me like a bloody head on a fence post! - Stewie Griffin

Sound's like somthing id say

This is funny no matter what show it's from - Game of Thrones even!

49 Cut my milk! - Stewie Griffin

Pure humor and idiotic behavior by Stewie. He's smarter than that, but that's what makes him so darn funny.

50 I didn't have gas for the first time until I was 30. [farts] What the hell was that? - Peter Griffin
51 Bill Cosby: Stewie, what do you think candy is made out of? Stewie Griffin: Sunshine and farts! What the hell kind of question is that?!

Funniest thing I've ever heard!!! - Jeheffiner

52 When I stick this army guy with the sharp bayonette up my nose, it tickles my brain. Hah hah hah ... ow. Oh, now I don't know math. - Chris Griffin

I did that once and I forgot math too.

53 I like you. When I rule the world, your death shall quick and painless. -Stewie Griffin

This one has bee on t-shirts and more. This should have been one of the top 10!

54 (Peter & Brian In the middle of a conversation) Oh my god! You can talk! - Peter V 1 Comment
55 I spit in your mouth when you sleep! - Stewie Griffin V 1 Comment
56 Now that you can't see, let's do a little vision test. What is this? A poopie or a Toblerone? - Stewie Griffin after he breaks Meg Griffin's glasses

ha!!! i couldn't stop laughing!!! - pishposh11

57 It's peanut butter jelly time! - Brain V 2 Comments
58 And boom goes the dynamite! - Cleveland
59 I'm not a dog you fat bastard! - Meg
60 I say mother, this hotdog has been on my plate for a full minute and it hasn't cut itself. - Stewie Griffin
PSearch List

Recommended Lists

Related Lists

Top Ten Funniest Family Guy Quotes Best Family Guy Characters Top Ten Best Family Guy Episodes Top 10 Family Guy Songs Top 10 Funniest Family Guy Characters

List StatsUpdated 24 Jul 2017

5,000 votes
212 listings
11 years, 227 days old

Top Remixes (11)

1. The life of the wife is ended by the knife. - Stewie Griffin
2. Her fists are so dangerous she's not allowed to be a lesbian. - Brian Griffin
3. Eh, you're overreacting Lois and you can't spell overreacting without ovary... 'cause you're a girl. - Peter
1. Giggity giggity giggity - Quagmire
2. Because you touch yourself at night - Museum tour guide to a child Peter Griffin after asking why the dinosaurs died
3. No Quagmire, we're not esupposed to! - Peter
1. You'd better watch who you're calling a child, Lois. Because if I'm a child, you know what that makes you? A Pedophile. And I'll be damned if I'm gonna be lectured by a pervert. - Peter Griffin
2. Mum mum mum mum mummy mummy mummy mummy Lois........ Hi- Stewie
3. Woah, woah, woah, woah, woah, woah, woah, woah, woah, woah, woah, woah... Lois, this is not my Batman glass. - Peter Griffin

View All 11


Add Post

Error Reporting

See a factual error in these listings? Report it here.