Top 10 Funniest InsultsCelestius
The Top Ten
, that is a genius come-back! That is so SMART! Even I wouldn't have thought of that, though I am really bad at comebacks.
Great comeback used it so much at school
I'm using this one on The next person I see I hate
Well I got a joke that will kill you god made rivers god made lakes god made you hell everyone makes mistakes
that's notV 34 Comments
Another one is:Roses are red and violets are blue: I thought I was ugly until I met ya
Roses are red violets are blue I got five fingers the middle one's for you - PewDiePie
Why on earth are you here?! School doesn't allow litter.
Roses are red violets are blue I thought donkeys were ugly until I met you.V 78 Comments
Don't work out so will
Ha ha laugh out loud
Laugh out loud so funny!
THIS IS SO FUNNY THAT I LITERALLY DIED LOLOLOLOLOLOLOL 69696969696969V 15 Comments
Laugh out loud great for my main enemy that lies A LOT
Used it on my bro he got peed off
I know you lie your lips are moving tell me do you think I'm dumb
Looking at you, Donald TrumpV 17 Comments
My ass smells like cherry coke on a sundernesday because of the time I drove my donkey to work on a twinkie plane... I just said mommy in the bath tub with batman
I started laughing my ass off when all I saw was dumbass. That's a word not a insult
Just classic use of insults since it always leaves your enemy slack dropped of and pissed off. I did this on my mates and they were owned
I used this to tell my girlfriend when she didn't give me the S U C CV 10 Comments
Wow this is perfect. "Yo mama" jokes are cruel and unfunny. But this? This is comic GOLD!
That is a true burn. The one true burn. BURN! Be it Indian, Chinese or just leant on a soldering iron, it's a BUR! - PositronWildhawk
Laugh out loud this is hilarious!
Ha ha ha get recked you said that toV 30 Comments
I'm so gonna use this classy one
I am cracking up with my friend ha ha ha ha ha ha ha
Oh yeah, it must be very VERY BIG! But not bigger than my personality, I am the biggest PERSONALITY EVER! - AnimeDrawer
I will try itV 9 Comments
"your birth certifercet is an apology for the condom factory"
You so ugly that santa paid you to kill yourself
I don't get it but I'm sure someone will find it funny...
Hahahha yes this is the best!V 20 Comments
I love this one totally using it on someone from my school, totally gonna shut them up!
This is so funny I and totally going to use this when my uncles disses me again you wait because this insult will be used. I garden tee you that this is the best insult ever to be found please use it because I am
This is so funny! I am so going to use this on my friends when they're making fun of me again. I'll bet this will make them shut up.
funny!V 10 Comments
I love this so much
Laugh out loud so funny
I usually hate yo mamma jokes but this one is decent - Leaftail
Not even the mirror can stand looking at my momma. - AnimeDrawerV 18 Comments
This joke is way better than the ther ones. I t's funny it makes sense and it doesn't sound like some three year old isn't trying to make fun of you...
So good! This is probably one of the only comebacks which would actually work when it's not inside your head - reality stinks
That's awesome without being to insulting or hurtful to someones family or looks! I will use this today.
Self explanatoryV 16 Comments
Laugh out loud funny as ever
I always use this when I met my girlfriend's mom
Well, my mom is a bear, that is why she weighs 1000 pounds. I am half human and half bear. - AnimeDrawer
Lol couldn't stop laughingV 2 Comments
So funny laugh out loud
You were so ugly when you were born that the doctor told your mom what a treasure and your mom said yeah lets bury it
Love it used it on my friend he was lost for words! Thanks man
THAT IS JUST CLASSIC I love IT :3V 13 Comments
Whoever said God isn't real if you were to insult me try to take a guess what finger I'd put up
God doesn't make mistakes. Don't reply that He's not real because I won't believe you. He is real and nothing can tell me otherwise. - RedTheGremlin
Everybody makes mistakes even your mum when she forgot condoms
That's goodV 14 Comments
Man, this is so offensive but it's also at the same time hilarious
Just thought of it
But they need the body parts!
Best combackV 6 Comments
Nice one! :P Always wanted to try this, just waiting for the chance to try it! I totally agree with this one though.
Laugh out loud I should say that to my worst enemy!
I love this joke it is so funny. This kid who lives behind me always insults me and I insult him back!
amazingV 17 Comments
I love you man! This is the best come back of all time
So hilarious I can use it on m enemies who have dates and break them up
LoL I love this one I'm sooo gonna use it!
That is Funny
I'm gonna say this to my bro!
So funny it brought tears to my eyes
Damn funny! My favorite until now!
Lmao best roast ever M8V 5 Comments
Used it already! Very good insult to use on people, love it you should use it to it messes people up a lot. Amazing!
Haha that's funny it would take a while for the person to catch on! Laugh out loud
THIS ONES ON A JAYJAYS T-SHIRT... ME BROTHER HAS IT...
its funny! plus.. Who whould say that?
That's from beauty and the beastV 2 Comments
Maybe because they're Velcro :L
I didn't know how to tie my shoes until I was 11. :(
I'm 9 and can't tie my own shoes. Quite Sad :(
Ohh! Major burn! I will have to try this. People always make fun of my pixie cut and the size of my nose so now i, ll always have a comeback!
You mom is so fat, every time she wears high heels, she strikes oil.
I love nature but when I hate someone I wish it left
Oh my gosh
Someone call the fire department because u just got burned!
English tricky language...
Its: Your so fat that the equator is 20000 time shorter OR 20000 times shorter, not both mate
Are you Australian? You said the word 'mate. ' It's fine if you R. I'm attracted to cute Australians. Forget British accents!V 2 Comments
Brother told that to me and we laughed together
Eish my friend kaylan naidoo died when I told him that Eminem why don't you come to South Africa at gauteng. At 2 November
Very cruel. What if I tell my boyfriend this...
My enemy is going to be so confused when I tell her this
Lol this is funny but if you actually said that to a cop man are you ever in trouble
Sounds extremely disturbing and awkward
Honestly, I don't find this very funny, I have been cleaning my finger nails with a giant knife and you know maybe somebody ran into it, maybe they didn't. People just need to be more careful. YeeeHaaaw
That's sick (as in DISGUSTING)V 2 Comments
This made me laugh but the others did not really
Dora annoys the crap out of me. Hope I'm not alone
Yo momma so fat she needs Google earth to find her ass hole
Laugh out loud this is hilariousV 2 Comments
I love this one
Ha Ha! SO FUNNY THIS IS A COMEDY MASTERPIECE!
Love it too
awesomeV 1 Comment
That's not so great.
That is very poor laugh out loud
I'm gonna stick to the laffy taffy jokes
I'm sorry but I don't like this😖V 2 Comments
Really? I've heard popsicle jokes funnier
Really. not to be rude bit I've heard better comments than this
I love this one. One time I got into a fight with someone on a field trip and I roasted him in front of like fifty people
This is true just ask my friend kyle he has the same situation as all of you reading
This is the funniest comeback of all time!
Please apply cold water to burnsV 3 Comments
Can't you put an animal more disgusting on there? Like a cowV 1 Comment
Yo mama so poor she eats cereal with a fork to save the milk, now that is funny
Yo mama so stupid she got locked in a grocery store overnight and starved to death
Yo mama so stupid she got locked in a mattress store and slept on the floor
He messed up the cerealV 3 Comments
Not a good one man
This one was so bad that I laughed - RedTheGremlin
Me every day lol
Kind of like "I miss you, but my aim is improving. " - usmc650736
I'm doing this to this girl that is always a b*tch to me and my friends she is really fat and ugly and tries to fit in but she can't because she takes up the whole hallway oo burn
You always have that one friend that secretly annoys you.
Good one! I'll use it on this really annoying kid.V 1 Comment
Saying this to nearly every girl I know
I'm a girl myself, but I must give this insult credit.
Lol I'm a girl but that's funny
Amazing jokes lmaoV 10 Comments
Telling that to my dictator teacher. Probably get suspended but what eves. My private school sucks anyway. GO PUBLIC SCHOOLS
I dare you to use this on your mother!
I would not have the balls to say that to my mom...V 3 Comments
Your family tree isn't a family tree it's a cactus because they're all pricks
Great. I used this as a 'comeback' at school when someone called me ugly.V 1 Comment
Laughed the heck out of me it's so funny!
Too funny I was laughing so hard...V 2 Comments
I've heard funnier jokes like what is this a grain of salt? Come on. Be more original
What about half an atom? :(
This is an insult, really.😐
That is so cruel
I hate who wrote this to him I love justin
That is so mean to him laugh out loud
Yes lmao this just made me laugh immdeatlyV 3 Comments
I am gonna use this on annoying person in my class
Laugh out loud! Fell off my chair!
I literally just dropped my apple chips all over the floor
This is pretty everyone's lol of the day!
SavageV 6 Comments
I'll tell that one to my older sibling. We'll both laugh out loud
Best comeback in human history
I'm using this on my friends
PerfectV 2 Comments
I'll use this on the wife hopefully she'll divorce me
Divorce isn't pretty you know.
Good lord this is so funny!
This just made me snort.
Oh, that was funny.
Humor at it's simplest.
I will defiantly use this!
LMFAO I JUST DIED
I just love this, why isn't it in the top 10?!?
so gooodV 2 Comments
Hey good one this will surely help me in insulting those fashion crazy bimbos
Who do so much make up that I actually once said to them " are you the ancestors of monkey because you look worst than that "
Love this one! Haha! Another one is, your so ugly that when your mom dropped you off at school she got a fine for littering
This one was so funny I'm gonna use it sometime this week lol
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Top Remixes (10)
2. Your dad's condom is a bigger than your personality
3. You're so poor I saw you kicking a can across the street I asked you what you were doing you said moving.
2. The only way you'll ever get laid is if you crawl up a chicken's ass and wait.
3. We can always tell when you are lying. Your lips move.
3. Ahhh!!! Run a bear, oh wait that's just your mom
View All 10