Top Ten Funniest Jokes

The Top Ten
1 It's garbage day? Awe they made a special day just for you!

LOL my classmates died laughing

It's so funny I soiled myself

That was good

I'm so using that

2 Were you born on a highway? Because that's where most accidents happen

It's better than all the other jokes.

Ha! In yo face sucka

You get in a wreck.


3 Whats brown and sticky? A stick!

I thought something else

I hear it every time


I love this joke people always don't get the question at first  but when I say the answer they laugh at themselves for thinking that it was something else

4 Why was the cat scared of the tree? Because it barks

Its brown it barks so funny!

Get it tree bark?

This joke is oak

Ha Ha so funny

5 Why are ghosts bad to have at a sports event? Because they boo!

I love this joke!
its saying that ghosts don"t cheer, they "BOO! "

Wow so good boo

6 Why did the skeleton cross the road? To get to the body shop!

That has made me laugh so much!

7 A husband and wife are trying to set up a new password for their computer. The husband puts, "Mypenis," and the wife falls on the ground laughing because on the screen it says, "Error. Not long enough."

Alright I would never add this I would never even think about this but this is hilarious

Lol ok that's awesome, I mean a man needs to now right?

This is the best joke I have ever heard

I laughed out loud for this one

8 What is a witch with an itch? Without a "W"

At frst I didn't get it but know I do, It is hard foe me to say this because I'm a positive person but it's weird

witches are good when there sand witches. but without the sand! :)

9 Where do cows go on dates? To the moo-vies

So lame I love it

Eh kinda good



10 What did the moon say to the young couple? Hey you two should kiss!

Umm...I’m sorry to say it’s kinda weird :/

That’s from ASDF movies

The Contenders
11 The teacher asked Jimmy, "Why is your cat at school today Jimmy?" Jimmy replied crying, "Because I heard my daddy tell my mommy, 'I am going to eat that p*ssy once Jimmy leaves for school today!'"

That's the funniest thing I've heard all day.

No fair he gets to bring a pet to school I wanna bring a pet to he is a little tiny cry baby ooh get burnt

Those parents doe

That is so funny. I’m going to use that

12 Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? He didn't have the guts!

That sounds like a good and bad joke

I said this joke for J day at my school. 😆 lol

13 What is big and yellow, comes in the morning to brighten mom's day?....the school bus!
14 Broccoli: Hey! I look like a tree! Mushroom: Wow! I look just like an umbrella! Walnut: I look exactly like a brain. Banana: Man, can we change the topic please?

Should've been a sausage

That was funnyy

15 If a clown farts, does it smell funny?

Laugh out loud that is fuuunnnyy

16 What's green and has wheels? GRASS! I lied about the wheels...

Great joke I love it but you should change it I really thought grass had wheels...

Unreliable narrator makes it unique

Hahaahahaa wait, I thought grass had wheels

17 Yo momma is so fat, I took a picture of her last Christmas and it's still printing

My printer is not that big

18 Why did the racist chicken cross the road? That wasn't a road. That was the border!
19 What do you call a game console you just broke up with? An X-Box!

#gamer for life

20 What do you call a fish with no eyes?...... Blind
21 Why do don't give Elsa a balloon? Because she will let it go

My mum laughed at this funny kid joke when I told her

Uhhh oh I get it, its funny

22 I dated this disabled chick and when she broke up with me she took my dog. I took her wheelchair. Guess who came crawling back?

I cried so much it's amazing

Sick, but funny as hell

23 Yo mama so stupid she thought fruit punch was a gay boxer
24 How did the skeleton know it was going to rain? He read the weather forecast you idiot(s).
25 What do you call a bicycle that is in the corner? Two-tired
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