Top 10 Funniest Misheard Lyrics From Metal Songs

Metal_Treasure
Misheard song lyrics are called mondegreen - it's a result of near-homophony that gives it a new meaning, often funny.

The Top Ten

1 Gimme food, Gimme fries! Gimme salad on the side! - Fuel, Metallica Gimme food, Gimme fries! Gimme salad on the side! - Fuel, Metallica

Actual Lyric:
Give me fuel, give me fire, give me that which I desire. - Metal_Treasure

Ha! I bet James probably orders this at fast food restaurants! - AnimeDrawer

Nice image, I bet that what happens when james hetfield orders fast food - BlazinWraith

This is pretty funny - toptendudes

V 4 Comments
2 Hamster! A Dentist! Hard porn! Steven Seagal! - Wishmaster, Nightwish

Actual Lyric:
Master! Apprentice! Heartborne! 7th Seeker! - Metal_Treasure

3 You try to take his balls - Symphony of Destruction, Megadeth

At first I thought it was that. I also thought the end of holy wars was "mercy you know they'll take my balls away"

And until reading the actual lyric I thought it was "you try to take his boss" - Skullkid755

Actual lyric:
You try to take its pulse. - Metal_Treasure

I heard it and then couldn't unhear it

100% The Most Ridiculous One lmao

4 Masturbate, masturbate, rub your muscle, don't be late! - Halloween, Helloween

Actual: Masquerade, Masquerade, Grab Your Mask and Don't Be Late - somekindofaguy

Holy crap, this is funny - KingSlayer93316

5 Fear of the duck, fear of the duck - Fear of the Dark, Iron Maiden

PsychoStick did a song based on this called"Quack kills". Pretty funny from a great band - RustyNail

I can't unhear it...
Actual Lyric: Fear of the Dark
But the chorus with misheard lyrics completely makes sense:
"Fear of the duck, fear of the duck
I have a constant fear that something's always near
Fear of the duck, fear of the duck
I have a phobia that someone's always there" - Metal_Treasure

6 Raking the lawn! Raking the lawn! - Breaking the Law, Judas Priest Raking the lawn! Raking the lawn! - Breaking the Law, Judas Priest

Actual Lyric: Breaking the Law - Metal_Treasure

Powder in your ears much? - Kevinsidis

I can't unhear that now

"Brick in the lawn" is also a popular version. I added it to this list, too - Metal_Treasure

7 Santa Claus will pee tonight - Neon Knights, Black Sabbath

Funnier than the gimme food one! - PhoenixAura81

Actual Lyric:
Sail across the sea of lights - Metal_Treasure

8 Anal sex! - Dyer’s Eve, Metallica

Actual lyric:
Innocence! - Metal_Treasure

Ooh, yeah...*squirts hand sanitizer* - NightmareCinema

9 I've got B.O., to see the truth - Hallowed Be Thy Name, Iron Maiden

Actual lyric: I've gone beyond to seek the truth - Metal_Treasure

10 My name's Tony. I've got some bacon - Die by the Sword, Slayer

Actual Lyric:
Mindless tyranny, forgotten victims. - Metal_Treasure

This ruined the song for me, but it’s still funny - KingSlayer93316

The Contenders

11 Controlling bastard, I'll be your mustard! Mustard! - Master of Puppets, Metallica

Actual Lyric: Come crawling faster, obey your master! Master! - Metal_Treasure

Despite being one of my favorite songs of all time, these misheard lyrics are hilarious! I wonder who thought of that and I wonder if that spawned any memes. - PhoenixAura81

12 I like juice, finish your juice, feel the vitamin substance - Rational Gaze, Meshuggah

Actual Lyric:
Our light induced, image of truth, filtered blank of its substance. - Metal_Treasure

This lyric hurts my mind of being misheard like that.Wax in your ears much or powder? - Kevinsidis

13 There's no bread, lemony cake! - Bastille Day, Rush

I don't think Rush are metal and they shouldn't be on this list - Metal_Treasure

14 Harold be thy name - Hallowed Be Thy Name, Iron Maiden
15 I'm baking a lemon inside you! - Glass Shatters, Disturbed

Wow. Just wow.

HOW DO YOU HEAR THIS?! - KingSlayer93316

16 As I watch Jethro Tull - Ride the Lightning, Metallica

Actual lyric: As I watch death unfold - Metal_Treasure

17 I’ve paid for yummy steaks - No More Sorrow, Linkin Park

Good song but this is NOT metal. - CaptainMowzker

18 He's on a man and he moans. She sees the change in him - FullMoon, Sonata Arctica

Actual lyric: He's not a man anymore. She sees the change in him - Metal_Treasure

19 Watch me fading, I'm losing, all my lipsticks falling into darkness - These Walls, Dream Theater

Actual lyric: Watch me fading, I'm losing, all my instincts falling into darkness - Metal_Treasure

How is it possible to mishear 2000s LaBrie? - AdamDestructorJr.

20 Kill Aquaman - Kill on Command, Vio-Lence

Actual lyric: Kill on Command - somekindofaguy

21 Burning hard, seducing queen! - Fuel, Metallica

Actual lyric: Burning hard, loose and clean! I have no Idea why I thought of that RIGHT when I was just listening to this song. I added this by the way. - PhoenixAura81

Woah, this increased significantly. Should I make a meme about this? - PhoenixAura81

22 F*** this wh**e - Voices, Dream Theater

Actual Lyric: Thought disorder. - Metal_Treasure

23 Bring me a doughnut to the sauna - Bring Your Daughter to the Slaughter, Iron Maiden

Actual lyric: Bring me your daughter to the slaughter - Metal_Treasure

24 Next thing you know, they'll take my dogs away - Holy Wars... The Punishment Due, Megadeth

I truly thought that was the lyric for some time - RustyNail

Actual lyric: Next thing you know, they'll take my thoughts away. - Metal_Treasure

25 Tighten the turkey around your neck - Postmortem, Slayer

Actual lyric: Tighten the tourniquent around your neck - Metal_Treasure

Wait, so you're saying these aren't the actual lyrics?
...
...
...

.
*boom* - LeiaSkywalker

26 Devastate them, techno prisoners, cremate them - Take No Prisoners, Megadeth

Actual lyric: Devastate them, take no prisoners, cremate them - Metal_Treasure

27 Dreams of dragon's fire and of baked apple pie - Enter Sandman, Metallica

Actual Lyric:
Dreams of dragon's fire and of things that will bite. - Metal_Treasure

Why does Metallica have a ton of mishearf lyrics - Manlypants

I think every band does have misheard lyrics (both metal and non-metal) but Metallica are just more popular, more people listen to them, and respectively - more misheard lyrics. - Metal_Treasure

28 If you want the world, lose your mind - The World is Yours, Arch Enemy

Actual lyric: If you want the world, use your mind - Metal_Treasure

29 I'm your pain when you can't feel self-control - Sad But True, Metallica

I always heard it as "Sand Patrol." I guess I'm not the only one, cause I've seen jokes about it on the internet. - Gg2000

Actual lyric:
I'm your pain when you can't feel
Sad but true - Metal_Treasure

30 Hey, hey, I'm your wife and I no longer care - Sad But True, Metallica

Actual lyric: Hey, hey, I'm your life and I no longer care - Metal_Treasure

31 "Centipede of heaven / God share the eyes of the night" - Stargazers, Nightwish

Actual lyrics:
"Tragedienne of heavens / Watching the eyes of the night" - Martin_Canine

32 I'm your pain when you can't feel sand patrol - Sad But True, Metallica

Actual lyric:
I'm your pain when you can't feel
Sad but true - Metal_Treasure

33 I'm Addicted to Cats - Addicted to Chaos Megadeth

I'm Addicted to Chaos

34 Valhalla, the liver runs! - Valhalla, Blind Guardian

Actual Lyric: Valhalla, deliverance! - Metal_Treasure

35 It's domination, pushed into minivans - Domination, Pantera

What? How does "living hell" sound like minivans? - LeiaSkywalker

Actual Lyric: It's domination, pushed into living hell. - Metal_Treasure

36 I'm your terrible lover, tell me there's no other - Turbo Lover, Judas Priest

Actual lyric: I'm your turbo lover, tell me there's no other. - Metal_Treasure

37 The liquid is in your throat, all pasteurized - The Lotus Eater, Opeth

Actual lyric: The liquid is in your throat for hopeless delight. - Metal_Treasure

38 I'll keep the muffin - The Curse of Feanor, Blind Guardian

Actual Lyric: I'll keep on laughing. - Metal_Treasure

39 Can I play with magnets? - Can I Play With Madness, Iron Maiden
40 Hairspray to hold raw energy - Mouth for War, Pantera

Actual lyric: Hands break to hone raw energy. - Metal_Treasure

41 Give me two, give me five, give me a dollar 'n' fifty five! - Fuel, Metallica

Actual Lyric:
Give me fuel, give me fire, give me that which I desire. - Metal_Treasure

42 Gimme Foo, Gimme Fah, Gimme Dabadjabadzhah! - Fuel, Metallica

Actual Lyric:
Give me fuel, give me fire, give me that which I desire. - Metal_Treasure

This is the point he ran out of ideas. - AdamDestructorJr.

No. You are wrong. Many people have heard something similar, me including. It's a pretty unintelligible line and it gave me a hard time during the first several listens. Until I decided to read the lyrics. So YOUR comment was the point when YOU ran out of ideas for comments. Comments based on assumptions are really pointless. And annoying. - Metal_Treasure

Accurate - LeiaSkywalker

43 Take the bean killer, psycho on your bicycle - Painkiller, Judas Priest
44 Brick in the lawn! You don't know what it's like! - Breaking the Law, Judas Priest
45 Carrots that wander never fade in rain and you're hard, and Jesus bought my sorrow, carrots that wander hiding Eminem in a lamb - Amaranth, Nightwish

Quite possibly my favorite misheard lyric ever - 445956

46 This is sandpit turtle! - Sempiternal by Bring Me The Horizon
47 Lemon Nation, DOG, WINE, WHACK DUCKS - P.L.U.C.K, System of A Down

Actual lyric: Elimination,DIE,WHY,WALK DOWN

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List Stats

100 votes
47 listings
26 days old

Top Remixes (6)

1. Gimme food, Gimme fries! Gimme salad on the side! - Fuel, Metallica
2. Fear of the duck, fear of the duck - Fear of the Dark, Iron Maiden
3. Hamster! A Dentist! Hard porn! Steven Seagal! - Wishmaster, Nightwish
htoutlaws2012
1. Masturbate, masturbate, rub your muscle, don't be late! - Halloween, Helloween
2. Gimme food, Gimme fries! Gimme salad on the side! - Fuel, Metallica
3. Santa Claus will pee tonight - Neon Knights, Black Sabbath
Metal_Treasure
1. Hamster! A Dentist! Hard porn! Steven Seagal! - Wishmaster, Nightwish
2. Masturbate, masturbate, rub your muscle, don't be late! - Halloween, Helloween
3. Anal sex! - Dyer’s Eve, Metallica
floral

WRemix
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