Top Ten Funniest Toilet Signs

The Top Ten
1 Our aim is to keep the bathroom clean. Gentlemen. Your aim will help. Stand closer. It's shorter than you think. Ladies. Please remain seated for the entire performance.

What a funny list? - Animefan12

Hehehe! I really really liked this item! - CelerityCelebrity

2 No laughing at other people's farts.

... HAHAA! Oh my GOD! This is hard not to do. It's irrational I know but...
There was a woman (obviously) in the next cubicle and she let out a tight fart, she apologised, then we both howled with laughter! I still wonder what she looks like. Haha! FART! Great! Thanks for the laugh, Pos. Excellent list! =D

This can be pretty hard... Especially for SOME people in this world!

My Asian relatives should really top laughing at little kids' farts

No, just no. LOL XDDD

3 If you dribble while you piddle, be a sweetie, wipe the seatie.

I saw this on a sign in the bathroom today. Literally.

4 If a first you don't succeed, keep flushing!

Might want to use the plunger - ethanmeinster

5 A toilet brush has been provided for use; please use it if needed. My advice to everyone is don't do it, it hurts too much, stick to toilet paper.

I'll never picture toilet brushes in the same way ever again. - PositronWildhawk

6 Urinal Etiquette: Aim at the urinal. Step forward; it may be shorter than you think. Do not drink the water. Do not throw cigarettes in the urinals as this makes them hard to light.
7 Please aim straight. You are not the only one using the toilet.
8 Gentlemen. If you do not have good aim, urinate by sitting on the toilet. It is always appreciated. You are not the only one to use the toilet. If you make a mess, wipe it off with your shirt. Thank you. Oh, and don't forget to wash your hands.

No one wants to do that.

“Use your shirt to clean up the mess”
Toilet Paper: Am I a joke to you?

9 Please lift the toilet seat up after use (female). Please lift the toilet seat up before use (male). Thank you.

You just repeated it but for different genders!

10 We aim to please. You aim too, please.

Wordplay 101.

The Contenders
11 Pls don’t flush feminine products, your goldfish, or your hopes and dreams down the toilet

I am not sure how you can flush hopes and dreams down the toilet. Also, if the water conditions are bad for your goldfish (not enough salinity, temperature, etc.) it can drown.

Feminine products do clog up the toilet, so yeah. I agree. - MaxTheBorderCollie

I literally saw this sign two days ago at a weekend retreat. I immediately made a mental note to remember it and post it here. 😂

12 Toilets and urinals flushed with reclaim water. Do not drink.

UGH! WHY WOULD ANYONE DO THAT?!?!

what?

13 Toilet only for disabled elderly pregnant children.

I cannot see how children can be pregnant or elderly.

Not sure how children can be elderly.

That's quite overly specific.

Elderly children?

14 May I have your attention, please? Please do not dive into the toilet. Thank you.

I wouldn't make that toilet sign if I were you.

Who would even intend to?

15 If you sprinkle while you tinkle, please be neat and wipe the seat.

LOL But they should have these signs because the fling boys make the girls sit on their pee. NASTY

I saw this on a sign in a school open evening I went to!

Copycat.

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