Top 10 GLaDOS Quotes

xandermartin98

The Top Ten

1 "Remember when the platform was sliding into the fire pit and I said GOODBYE and you were like NO WAY and then I was all WE PRETENDED WE WERE GOING TO MURDER YOU? That was GREAT!"
2 "That thing you burned up isn't important to me; it's the fluid catalytic cracking unit, it made shoes for orphans."
3 "That thing is probably some kind of raw sewage container! GO AHEAD AND RUB YOUR FACE ALL OVER IT! Why don't you marry that thing since you love it so much? WELL I WON'T LET YOU! How does THAT feel?!"
4 "Even though you broke my heart and killed me, and TORE me to pieces, and THREW every piece...into...a fire, as they burned it hurt because I was so happy for you!"
5 "Don't believe me? Here, I'll put you on! HEEEOOOOOO! THAT'S YOU! THAT'S HOW DUMB YOU SOUND!"
6 "Maybe you'll find someone else to help you? Maybe Black Mesa? THAT WAS A JOKE, HA HA, FAT CHANCE!"
7 "It was a device they plugged into me after I flooded the enrichment center with a deadly neurotoxin to keep me from flooding the enrichment center with a deadly neurotoxin, so please get comfortable while I warm up the neurotoxin emitters"
8 "How are you holding up? Because I'm a POTATO!"

Best quote forever and always 100%

9 "You're not a scientist! You're not a doctor! YOU'RE NOT EVEN A FULL-TIME EMPLOYEE!"
10 "The Weighted Companion Cube will never threaten to stab you and in fact cannot speak; in the event that it DOES speak, please contact Aperture Science psychiatric assistants immediately"

The Contenders

11 "Deploying surprise in five, four — *clunk* — time out for a second. That wasn't supposed to happen. Do you see that thing that fell out of me? What is that? It's not the surprise; I've never seen it before. Nevermind. It's a mystery I'll solve later.

BY MYSELF. Because you'll be dead." - xandermartin98

12 "In laymen's terms, SPPEDY THING GOES IN, SPEEDY THING COMES OUT!"
13 "You have now euthanized your faithful Companion Cube."
14 "Aperture Science regrets to inform you that android HELL is a REAL place where you WILL be sent"
15 "The Fifteen Hundred Megawatt Aperture Science Heavy Duty Super-Colliding Super Button"
16 "These emancipation grills may, in semi-rare cases, emancipate dental fillings, crowns, tooth enamel, and teeth."
17 "Please note that we have added a consequence for failure. Any contact with the chamber floor will result in an unsatisfactory mark on your official testing record, followed by death. Good luck!"
18 "The floor here will KILL you; try to avoid it"
19 "You will be baked, and there will be cake"
20 "THERRRE REEEALLY WAAAS A CAAAKKKE"
21 "Look: We're both stuck in this place. I'll use lasers to inscribe a line down the center of the facility, and one half will be where you live, and I'll live in the other half. We won't have to try to kill each other or even talk if we don't feel like it.
22 "Someday, we'll remember this and laugh. And laugh. And laugh."
23 "As part of a previously mentioned required test protocol, we can no longer lie to you. When the testing is over, you will be... missed!"
24 "The effects of prolonged exposure to the button are not part of this test"
25 "Aperture Science regrets to inform you that this next test is impossible"
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1 year, 97 days old

Top Remixes

1. "Remember when the platform was sliding into the fire pit and I said GOODBYE and you were like NO WAY and then I was all WE PRETENDED WE WERE GOING TO MURDER YOU? That was GREAT!"
2. "That thing you burned up isn't important to me; it's the fluid catalytic cracking unit, it made shoes for orphans."
3. "That thing is probably some kind of raw sewage container! GO AHEAD AND RUB YOUR FACE ALL OVER IT! Why don't you marry that thing since you love it so much? WELL I WON'T LET YOU! How does THAT feel?!"
xandermartin98

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