Greatest Movie Insults


The Top Ten

1 If my dog had a face like yours I'd shave his ass and teach him to walk backwards. - Gleaming the Cube

I heard a comment like this in a movie.
I didn't get it at first but now I do

That's what I'm gonna do to my dog!

I died, of luaghter, said it to my brother he was speachless

2 'scuse me, is that your nose or did a bus park on your face? - Roxanne

Woah this was great laugh out loud 😂

3 Is it true that when you were born the doctor slapped your mother? - Priscilla: Queen of the Desert
4 I'll use small words so that you'll be sure to understand, you warthog faced buffoon. - The Princess Bride

Best movie ever! (Also, awesome insult! )

5 Why, you stuck up, half-witted, scruffy-looking Nerf herder. - The Empire Strikes Back

Who you calling scruffy?

Best line ever


Leia: Why, you stuck up, half-witted, scruffy-looking Nerf herder!
Han: Who's scruffy looking? - PeeledBanana

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6 You pompous, stuck-up, snot-nosed, English, giant, twerp, scumbag, f***-face, d***head, ass****. - A Fish Called Wanda

You can't even read half of it!

The way he said it was awesome! People who have seen this movie are awesome! L o l this made my day

7 You clinking, clanking, clattering collection of caliginous junk. - Wizard of Oz
8 You are a sad, strange little man and you have my pity - Toy Story

Laugh out loud I love this one! And it's from a children's movie.. Which makes it all the more funnier... It's hilarious

Can you imagine saying this to someone? No comeback to that!

You guys realize the original plan had Woody calling Slinky a spring wiener?!

Lol so funny and of course, child appropriate

9 You s***-kicking, stinky, horse manure smelling motherf***** you - Casino
10 You dirt-eating piece of slime! You scum-sucking pig! You son of a motherless goat! - Three Amigos

Great movie! Great scene! Great insult!

This cracked me up!

The Newcomers

? What does that stand for? F****** big idiot? - Happytime Murders
? You're killing me Smalls! - The Sandlot

The Contenders

11 How art thou, thou globby bottle of cheap, stinking chip oil? Come and get one in the yarbles, if ya have any yarbles, you eunuch jelly thou! - A Clockwork Orange
12 You are physically repulsive, intellectually retarded, vulgar, insensitive, selfish, stupid, you have no taste, a lousy sense of humour and you smell - The Witches of Eastwick

This is awesome laugh out loud

13 You have the emotional range of a teaspoon. - Hermione Granger

I am a Harry potter fan. Hermione Granger is my favorite! Laugh out loud favorite. Quote from that movie!

Yay I'm a Harry Potter fan

Yh one for Harry Potter

14 Bull****. It looks to me like the best part of you ran down the crack of your mama's ass and ended up as a brown stain on the mattress. - Full Metal Jacket

This was my favorite line from the movie

This is the meanest and funniest I'v read on this list! Love it!

15 You play ball like a girl! - The Sandlot

This isn’t as hurtful now since some of the greatest ball players are women. - MJfan119

16 You're a c***. You're a c*** now and you've always been a c*** and nothings gonna change 'cause you're gonna become an even bigger c*** and have some more c*** kids - In Bruges

My favourite line from my favourite movie! Just a perfect insult

Fantastic. Says it all really

17 Your Mama Is Like a Vacuum Cleaner. She Sucks, She Blows, and Gets Laid In the Closet - The Campaign
18 Your mama is like a vacuum cleaner. She sucks, she blows, and gets laid in the closet - The Campaign

I HAVE to use this

This I probaly te best insult as I use it all the time the best film as well

19 In this case the killer saw the size of the bug's d*** and became insanely jealous. Then I'd lose 30 pounds... porking his wife! - Ace Ventura
20 No business for an insecure, junkyard, motherf*****! - Dolemite
21 Take this quarter, go downtown and have a rat gnaw that thing off your face. - Uncle Buck
22 You're just the afterbirth, Eli. You slithered out of your mothers filth. They should have put you in a glass jar on a mantlepiece. - There Will be Blood
23 I wouldn't piss on your gums if your teeth were on fire. - Encino Man
24 Does Barry Manilow know you raid his wardrobe? - The Breakfast Club
25 Zach, eyes off the pizza, mate. God made you lactose-intolerant for a reason, yeah? So fat. So fat. - The Internship
26 I don't want to talk to you no more, you empty-headed animal food trough wiper! I fart in your general direction! Your mother was a hamster and your father smelt of elderberries!

Monty Python and the Holy Grail

Best insult ever. Enough said.

27 You c*ck juggling thunderc*nt! - Blade: Trinity
28 You're an emotional f****** cripple and your soul is dog-s***. Every single f****** thing about you is ugly. - Bad Santa
29 If I Gave It Any Thought I Probably Would (Despise You) - Casablanca
30 You break her heart, I'll break your neck. - The Fast and the Furious
31 You've got about as much charm as a dead slug! - Haymitch
32 Your head is as empty as a eunuchs underpants - Blackadder: The Cavalier Years
33 Frankly my dear, I don't give a damn. - Gone With the Wind

How is this don't number one?

34 To call you stupid would be an insult to stupid people. I've known sheep who could outwit you. I've worn dresses with higher IQs, but you think you're an intellectual, don't you, ape? - A Fish Called Wanda
35 You son of a motherless goat! - Monty Python and the Holy Grail

I haven't heard this one before!

36 Cheap, lying, no-good, rotten, four-flushing, low-life, snake-licking, dirt-eating, inbred, overstuffed, ignorant, bloodsucking, dog-kissing, brainless, d***less, hopeless, heartless, fat***, bug-eyed, stiff-legged, spotty-lipped, worm-headed sack of monk
37 You dense, irritating miniature beast of burden! - Shrek
38 Did your parents have any children that lived? - Full Metal Jacket
39 Of course your opinion matters! Just not right now - Cloudy With A Chance of Meatballs 2
40 I don't shut up I grow up and when I look at you I throw up - Stand By Me
41 You're a silly, empty-headed... female! - The Fox and the Hound
42 You get nothing! You lose! Good day sir! - Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory
43 You like apples? Here! How do you like them apples? - Good Will Hunting
44 It's rude enough being alive when no one wants you - Shrek
45 You know, that's just...your opinion man. - The Big Lebowski
46 Why don't you go home and F**** your mother some more!? - Gordie to Ace, Stand by Me

Awesome story by the way, (in Apt pulp by Stephen king for anyone who wants to know.) - MJfan119

47 I think I can tell who the wrong sort are for myself, thanks. - Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's stone
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Top Ten Funniest Movie Insult Scenes Best Insults Top 10 Funniest Insults Top 10 British Insults Best Insults Coined by Beavis and Butt-head

List Stats

200 votes
49 listings
5 years, 357 days old

Top Remixes

1. 'scuse me, is that your nose or did a bus park on your face? - Roxanne
2. Is it true that when you were born the doctor slapped your mother? - Priscilla: Queen of the Desert
3. If my dog had a face like yours I'd shave his ass and teach him to walk backwards. - Gleaming the Cube


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