Weekly Mediatraffic Songs Ranked (Week 27)

NiktheWiz
So, the year is more than halfway over. I'd like to take the time to introduce y'all to Mediatraffic, a chart that measures the popularity of songs worldwide. Unlike the Hot 100, which deals with the 100 biggest songs weekly, this chart deals with the 40 biggest songs weekly. Here's a link to this week's biggest songs for those who are interested.

http://www.mediatraffic.de/tracks-week27-2017.htm

Irredeemable:
40.) Body Like a Back Road Sam Hunt (Whelp, Sam Hunt made a "country" song worse than South Side, twice.)

Abysmal:
39.) Shape of You - Ed Sheeran (#1 for 16 weeks, people. Let that sink in; this is also the This Is What You Came For of 2017; and no, that song has not grown on me in the slightest)
38.) Strip That Down - Liam Panye ft. Quavo (Oh look, Shape Of You No.2)
37.) Thunder - Imagine Dragons (Oh god, if this peaks in the year-end, I'll lose it. It's not just those pitch-shifted vocals; it's also that godawful bridge.)
36.) Swalla - Jason Derulo (I really can't get over the fact that the beat is a modernization of THE MACARENA)
35.) Believer - Imagine Dragons (I really hate that chorus and the __ things _ lyrics.)

Horrible:
34.) Wild Thoughts - DJ Khaled ft. Rihanna & Bryson Tiller (I'd forgive the sampling if they actually did more with it, also DJ unnecessarily shouts his name towards the end)
33.) 2U - David Guetta ft. Justin Bieber (Screw that drop!)

Bad:
32.) I'm The One - DJ Khaled ft. Justin Bieber, Quavo, Chance the Rapper, & Lil Wayne (The Bieber fever is getting way out of control)
31.) Signs - Drake (Drake releasing a boring song isn't really breaking news.)
30.) Now or Never - Halsey (I say never.)
29.) Chained to the Rhythm - Katy Perry ft. Skip Marley (It's not even one of the five worst songs on the album; process that.)
28.) Stay - Zedd ft. Alessia Cara (The verses are fine, I guess, but that hook is a mess, especially that drop. Plus, I am really getting sick of hearing this all the time.)
27.) Despacito (Justin Bieber Remix) - Luis Fonsi ft. Daddy Yankee (I am starting to kinda hate Bieber)
26.) Issues - Julia Michaels (I really can't get past that stuttering in the hook. Julie herself also sounds like someone doing a bad impression of Ellie Goulding)
25.) Something Just Like This - The Chainsmokers ft. Coldplay (This is nothing but a worse version of Roses)

Meh:
24.) Mama - Jonas Blue ft. William Singe (Better than the Fast Car cover. Anything else?)
23.) Humble - Kendrick Lamar (As someone who adored DNA... yeah, I'm not feeling this.)
22.) Say You Won't Let Go - James Arthur (That lyrical structure.. everything else is alright though)

Mediocre/Mixed:
21.) Bridge Over Troubled Water - Artists for Grenfell (It's not terrible, but it's certainly doesn't stand a chance against Simon and Garfunkel's version.)
20.) XO TOUR LIFE - Lil Uzi Vert (Meh, it's just there. I don't hate it like I used to, but still...)
19.) Bad Liar - Selena Gomez (Selena's whispery vocals don't work on here, and that hook is irritatingly repetitive)

Decent:
18.) Feels - Calvin Harris ft. Pharrell Williams, Katy Perry, & Big Sean (it's a step down from Slide, but it's still good enough)
17.) Osaka Ai Eye Ai - Johnny's West (Btw, there will be occasions where a Japanese track pops up; some of them hit #1, but don't last very long on the chart.)
16.) Malibu - Miley Cyrus (Better than We Can't Stop and 23, but worse than Wrecking Ball and especially FU)
15.) Attention - Charlie Puth (Not bad, Charlie. Not that great, but it's a step in the right direction for him.)
14.) Congratulations - Post Malone (Congrats on your first top ten hit in the U.S.)

Good:
13.) Mask Off - Future (Future's voice is a little weak, but everything else is still solid)
12.) Unforgettable - French Montana ft. Swae Lee (I didn't think I would enjoy Swea Lee's performance on here, but he really delivers here.)
11.) There's Nothin' Holding Me Back - Shawn Mendes (Nice change for the guy. I am glad he is no longer stealing someone else's boyfriend or acting sneaky.)
10.) That's What I Like - Bruno Mars (Alright Bruno, you win this time. You managed to make me smile a little.)

Great:
9.) Your Song - Rita Ora (Not bad, Rita, but bad.)
8.) Peace Sign - Kenshi Yonezu (I'll gladly take this over weeaboo songs like the She's So Kawaii's)
7.) It Ain't Me - Kygo ft. Selena Gomez (The narrative is spot on, the hook is amazing, and the drop is weird, yet interesting enough.)

Fantastic:
6.) Slow Hands - Niall Horan (Looks like we got another improving 1D member.)
5.) Galway Girl - Ed Sheeran (This is so fun and goofy. I really love those fiddles and the Ed's enthusiasm.)
4.) Castle on the Hill - Ed Sheeran (Lovely narrative, well-produced instrumentals, and once again, Ed's enthusiasm.)

Excellent:
3.) Sign of the Times - Harry Styles (Who knew Harry could pull of rock music this amazingly?)
2.) Symphony - Clean Bandit ft. Zara Larsson (Beautiful, just beautiful)
1.) Redbone - Childish Gambino (This song makes me want to do something fun)

Score: 199/400 (49.75%). As egregious as 2017 is as a year for chart music in the U.S., I gotta admit that this chart is much better, despite still very slightly below mediocre.

Comments

DIE TIER
40. Body Like A Back Rosd
39. Tunnel Vision

SCRUB TIER
38. Thunder
37. Human (SO glad this flopped in the States)
36. Now or Never
35. Believer
34. Attention
33. Say You Won't Let Go
32. Strip That Down
31. Issues
30. Shape of You
29. Chained to the Rhythm
28. Something Just Like This
27. 2U (didn't completely hate this at first, then I realized it's the absolute most worthless and calculated song of the year)
26. Wild Thoughts
25. Mask Off (original)

BAD TIER
24. Signs
23. Stay
22. It Ain't Me
21. Despacito (remix)
20. Bad Liar

DON'T KNOW DON'T CARE (part of MEH)
19. Osaka Ai Eye Ai
18. Your Song
17. Peace Sign
16. Bridge Over Troubled Water
15. Mama

MEH TIER
14. XO TOUR Llif3 (Oh no! The moment I dread when Lil Uzi Vert is in the top 15)

DECENT TIER
13. There's nothing' Holdin' Me Back
12. Congratulations (ok shut up Nik, you actually LIKE White Iverson)
11. Malibu

GOOD TIER
10. Swalla
9. Feels
8. Unforgettable
7. That's What I Like
6. Slow Hands

GREAT TIER
5. Castle on the Hill
4. Galway Girl
3. Symphony
2. Redbone
1. Sign of the Times

Did you just include HUMBLE. is a bonus or something?

TOTAL: 69/200. 39.5%. Not outright bleach like the Hot 100 top 20 is, but still horrible. In a good year, no ranking except MAYBE one falls below 40. - WonkeyDude98

Shoot, didn't notice that mistake. - NiktheWiz

Fixed it; it was actually Humble that was on that week's chart. - NiktheWiz

It turns out that Tunnel Vision wasn't on that ranking either; it was I'm The One by DJ Khaled. I'm an idiot. - NiktheWiz

Also, you've written 'Something Just Like US'. Correct it, mah boi. - PhenomentalOne

"Better than the Fast Car cover"


Boi what is wrong with u?

Any way, good post, may do my own soon. - ProPanda

UPDATE: Move I'm the One to the Horrible Tier. Score is 198. - NiktheWiz

P