Top Ten Lame Arguments Used by Christians

Here they come again, Bible in hand, on a mission to save your soul. Prepare to eye-roll!

The Top Ten

1 How do you think you got here?

Sex - Luckys

My mom gave birth to me. - 3DG20

We got here by evolution and reproduction, not by some witch master who probably isn't real - KingSlayer93316

Seems to me that religious people are only aware of one alternative theory : the big bang. There are more theories than the big bang who are equally plausible. The oldest and now the less plausible theory is the god-theory. It's modern science and it's progressions that will maybe someday explain the beginning of the universe. It's certainly not the sudden proof of existence of god that will explain it!

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2 We are in the end times; read Revelation.

Listen even if Christian God exists...and he has committed the sin of sloth lazy to not appear on earth in our time. He would not send his son down here to behave like a monster, Jesus who was supposed to be peaceful. "Fundie who believes come to Heaven" "Sinner you will be beheaded" The seas turn into blood, some evil looking horsemen appear, Sinners go to Hell.

They have been predicting the rapture since the first century. We've also had Harold Camping and nuts that believed him, there are websites called Rapture Ready and Rapture Letters. The Rapture is a myth.

End of Times? Sorry but the world has always had disasters.

We are maybe in the beginning of the end ( I'm not sure about that ) but even if this was true it would be the people's fault. Unless god decided suddenly that his creation will be bad people now. Doesn't make any sense if you ask me!

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3 You must BELIEVE in order for prayers to be answered.

Me age 10 years old Dear God Can I have some money please Amen. Later no money. LOL.

That’s not how life works. - 3DG20

I'm not a Christian but I once heard a pastor say that God answers every prayer. He answer with "yes" "no" or "not yet" - maverick88

I believed for thirteen years. Someone I knew believed and he used his religion to justify his poor actions. "God has a plan". He drank himself to death. - Caleb9000

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4 If we came from Monkeys, then why are there still Monkeys?

Actually humans are more closely related to the great apes, not monkeys. And to everyone saying we evolved from fist, we evolved from single-celled organisms. - PhoenixAura81

If you came from your parents, why are there still parents? - Aceto

Actually we came from a fish - Hummingbirdf

According to scientific studies, we actually came from a fish, not an ape - KingSlayer93316

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5 You can't prove God doesn't exist

I don't have proof, but I know he is real because I'm a Christian. - Luckys

Then prove that He exists, then. Don't tell me that I can't prove He doesn't exist when you can't prove that He DOES.

I'm 100% positive God doesn't exist - westofohio

Welcome to Benkinersophobia...Lets find proof for the wizarding world.

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6 The Bible is a history Book.

Yes - Luckys

Yes and no. The Hebrews mixed history with theology, but there are huge portions of the bible that exaggerate, or try to tie religious belief with factual history, much of it being based on, or identical to, earlier Mesopotamian religious beliefs, in spite of things they knew were true even then. As well as many that contradict themselves. It is first, and foremost, a book of Christian theology, not history. - Daeralic

No, it isn't. But it's a great read, all those 1000+ pages. - Metalhead1997

No it is not - OhioStateBuckeyes

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7 The Bible says...

Noah was drunk after Noah's Ark.

The only argument they have. Which is not very good one - westofohio

Yep, it's a book. Written by humans. Who are flawed. - truckturner

I hate when Christians do that to me... - KingSlayer93316

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8 God works in mysterious ways.

he does - Luckys

Rarely in a good way! - westofohio

More like God works in delirious ways.

My church used to say this every time I would ask a question about God. I started doubting religion the exact moment they told me this sentence.

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9 God gave Man free will.

And the church took it away - westofohio

If god is omniscient it means he knows the future. If he knows the future it means that the future will develop the way he knew. If the future shouldn't develop that way it means he didn't knew the future. If everything develops because his omniscient it also means that everything happens necessary. And if everything happens necessary it means that there is no free will. You can't change something that will happen necesserary. And if there's no free will it means that people aren't responsable for their sins and acts. If god punish people because of their sins from wich they are not responsable it would mean that god is immoral. The conclusion is : Or god is omniscient and also immoral or he is not immoral but in that case he isn't omniscient. Logic says that god can't be omniscient and good if he gave free will to men. In more logical terms it means that there is no god and for that matter a god-given free will.

If you say that god give us limited free will ( this wouldn't be free anymore ) like you can't choose your species or you can't fly like superman ( like you wrote in your comment ), it would be saying that he gave free will with the conditions of nature. But nature is not neccerssally a god giving thing. You can ( and I'm sure we will one day ) explain nature by science proof.

So we have free will to do whatever we want yet God has a plan and knows exactly what we're gonna do in our lives, doesn't that seem a little contradicting to you?

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10 Jesus died for you.

He died for my sins. - Luckys

And does that change my life in any way? - KingSlayer93316

But He DID!

If he died or if he had lived what would be the difference in my life?

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The Contenders

11 If there is not god, then who made the universe?

Answer: The Big Bang

Why can't you Christians believe the works of science already? - KingSlayer93316

The answer is : Something else than god!

It's this very simple answer that you Christians refuse to believe in, it's called science

Maybe the universe was made in a universe cluster along with other universes? - CatsOMG

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12 If you ask God for forgiveness, you will be Saved.

Yep, no matter how bad it is, you will always be forgiven if you just believe. - 3DG20

Saved from what? I don't believe in god and I don't think that if you're doing something very bad like rape or kill someone you deserve to be forgiven. If god forgive you for something bad as that just because you ask him then I think god is immoral and not very sane if you ask me.

Conscience. And if they think that their conscience is clear it means that they think that they didn't do anything wrong because it's forgiven.

Of course you can't do all that. You have to go to confession (this is a Roman Catholic speaking).

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13 You're going to go to hell when you die

Thanks for the compliment. Now, move on with life - KingSlayer93316

14 Why don't you accept (religion)? If you don't believe, and it does exist, then you'll go to hell, but if it doesn't, then nothing bad happens

I was like 7 years old, at a sort of special daycare meant for children with mental disorders (Not very bad disorders, don't worry, I'm not a psycho.), and I was in the car back to the daycare because we went on a trip that day. During the car ride, the subject touched on religion. I said I didn't believe in god, and the other girl that was with me in the car simply said; ''Then you'll go to hell.'' Needless to say my 7 year old self was stressed out for the rest of the day.

But Atheists (like me) think there is no hell, so how are we suppose to know we'll go to hell? - KingSlayer93316

The only person not respecting other religions here is you. I will happily respect Christians and think no differently of them as long as they respect that back, and it’s the same with everything else. - 3DG20

I see this all the time, and the problem with this is that EVERYTHING has a risk. If you played it safe with everything, well, if I leave my house, a axe man might kill me, or I might die in a car accident, but the chances of this are slim, so I still go outside.

Another problem is that you can't 'put on' religion like a coat. It's not a belief unless you actually Belive it. And, if you're an atheist like me, it's hard to change your mind.

Remember to a Christian the fear of getting killed every time you leave the house is nothing compared to the fear of hell because they truly believe that those who are not "born-again" go to hell and the Christian does this to make you think about the risk and if it's really worth gambling with your soul. Of course if this the only reason to be a Christian then we can apply the same philosophy to all the other religions that send you to hell if you don't believe and at that point your most likely to pick the wrong religion anyway - maverick88

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15 God is just testing you

This is also not a lame argument. Theists believe in a close relationship with God, but it doesn't mean that they expect God to spoil them rotten. Hard times tend be a test of faith because God wants to see if humans are strong enough to deal with the harsh reality of the world.

This is completely stupid. It requires that god be an idiot who doesn't know if someone really believes or not, and had to do things to find out. This isn't an argument for god, mute of an explanation for why bad things happen, in spite of believers praying otherwise. - Daeralic

If god is testing me for something I didn't ask than he must be a very evil person (or whatever he is). He likes to play with his supposed creation or what?

The worst possible thing you can say to a grieving person - Frouze

16 Morality is only possible through religion

So, if I'm Atheist, I'm IMMORTAL?!

That's a silly claim - KingSlayer93316

17 God's time is not our time.

Time is relative. You can however measure time in relation with the speed of light. But when matter goes faster than light it will transform in pure enegergy. And beyond pure energy even time stops because it's impossible to measure something that doesn't react anymore. That is a proven scientefic theory. My question is, where is god in all that?

This is not a lame argument. It is used by beleivers because God is supposed to transcends humans in everything, including patience.

The problem with this one has more to do with believers, than non-believers. It's generally used as an alternative to, "I can't explain why your prayer hasn't been answered yet, or why this prophecy hasn't been fulfilled, etc". - Daeralic

18 God told me to give you this (hands you money).

I don't want money though. That's greedy - KingSlayer93316

If you just gave that to a homeless person, what would they honestly be able to do with it? - Metalhead1997

I'm a crishin and I enen thik that is crap

19 Global Warming is a myth. God created everything and the world is getting colder

Is the world getting colder because of atheists? If so, I take offense to that - KingSlayer93316

The worlds temperature has not increased in any major way over the past century. It may have changed a few degrees every now and then but that is completly natural and has always occurred. No doubt greenhouse gasses are a problem but overall the mass hysteria over "global warming" is complete uncalled for and defiantly should not be a concern for our government despite what Obama thinks. - maverick88

Global warming is happening but it takes too long to destroy the world

The average mean global temperature had been rising, since the dawn of the industrial revolution. It's been rising every year since, steadily, with 2015 being the hottest year in recorded history. People think that just because it gets cold locally, that somehow means that the whole planet must be normal. - Daeralic

20 God made Adam and Eve, not Adam and Steve

I kindly ask if you Adam and LEAVE. - XxembermasterxX

Jesus grew up with two dads and he turned out fine ;)

(got that from YouTube) - Luckys

Poor Steve though... I feel bad for the guy... - KingSlayer93316

This statement singlehandedly convinced me that God isn't real, a kind, loving God wouldn't just shun all the groups of people that he deems different, just because a man and a woman came first it doesn't mean it's the only way for love to happen, and what really pisses me off is that many Christians say it's their job to guide homosexuals down the right path, which in reality means they try to tell a homosexual person to just not be gay, which is completely stupid, a gay person can't just decide to not be gay, and for you to even try to "guide them" as you say, I think is just despicable

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21 You had to come from somewhere

My parents. - 3DG20

I came from my mother, not God. Why the hell would God summon me all of a sudden? - KingSlayer93316

We all came from the womb. - Metalhead1997

I can't believe my eyes! God made some people bad just because I'm suposed to help them? If one of those bad people is for instance a religious extremist who decides in the name of god to blow up with a bomb people who don't believe ( it can even be your family that is a victim of his acts ), I am the one who is suposed to help him? ( Response to the comment that god made bad people because we have to help them )

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22 Can atheists be good people? Where do they get their morals from?

Uhh from my parents?

Atheists can be good people (I’m an atheist and I’m not that bad) and they get their morals from either their family or their environment (i.e. me). - PhoenixAura81

23 God has a plan

He has a plan for me - Luckys

What is the plan? To kill every Atheist out there? - KingSlayer93316

I hear this one often. Whenever something is happening and we ask ourselves or ask another person, why? they can't answer or only answer the question by saying that it's god's plan and that we can't understand why. What's the " creator's masterplan " if we even don't know his plan? What use is it to us to know that he has a plan that we're not able to understand or to know? The ones who believe in god are just saying that because they're too blind or unwilling to accept the facts that we're living in a cruel and hostillity world and universe where bad things are natural and part of life. They think of course that everything that is cruel and hostillity is evil and the work of satan.

Then where are the blueprints?! - Metalhead1997

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100 votes
23 listings
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Top Remixes

1. How do you think you got here?
2. If there is not god, then who made the universe?
3. You can't prove God doesn't exist
1. God works in mysterious ways.
2. The Bible says...
3. How do you think you got here?
1. How do you think you got here?
2. We are in the end times; read Revelation.
3. You must BELIEVE in order for prayers to be answered.


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