A Stereotypical View of the band Slayer

IronSabbathPriest Egad, what is this? Do my ears decieve me? It is the sound of Slayer! I know that boring, repetitive riff anywhere! And look who it is...

KERRY F****** KING.

Wow Kerry. You are the best guitarist ever. You have showed us you can use your pedal whilst plucking the E string. And your solo's all sound the same as well. All played on the 12th fret or higher. Now piss off already!

CHUGGA CHUGGA CHUGGA CHUGGA CHUGGA

I said piss off!

Wait... they have a bass player? Wow. They might as well not because it's F****** INAUDIBLE ANYWAY.

And he's the same guy who screams into the microphone isn't he? Y'know? The guy who looks a bit like a caveman. Who talks really fast into the microphone, while again, plucking the E string.

And the drummer... OMG!!!! He is terrible! All those drums on his kit... and it's all just snare snare snare snare snare.

OH MY GOD!! It's Raining S***e! The one all the Slayer fanboys worship.

CHUGGA CHUGGA CHUGGA CHUGGA CHUGGA

For the last time, piss of Kerry! You bald man with a girls name!
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And all that... is what I would say if I disliked the band. Which to be honest... I'm not entirely sure why I like them.

Everything in this post is true. You can't deny it. Yet I still love them. Maybe it's because they're part of the big four, so I have to like them. Maybe it's because their songs are speedy and heavy. I don't know.

Tell me, do you like Slayer? Do you hate them? Has this post opened your eyes, for better or worse? ISP out.

Comments

I like slayer because they are aggressive, - visitor

I like Slayer - bobbythebrony

Kerry King: “Iron Maiden and Metallica are living off of past success”
Me: You haven’t been able to produce a good album in 27 years. - visitor