Best Moments and Quotes of Thelonelygoomba

The best moments and quotes of one of YouTube's most underrated gaming icons.

The Top Ten

1 "I'm a lonely goomba, stuck between two pipes. Guess I'll play this Game Boy...for the rest of my life."
2 "THAT is one UGLY son-of-a-bitch. There's only one thing to do with a face that ugly; charge into it as hard as you possibly can. Oh God, it's just making it WORSE! KILL IT! KILL IT!" (Wario Land 4)
3 "Level 4...and the 'MUSIC' sounds like someone who was having a seizure stumbled upon a xylophone." (Santa Claus Saves The Earth)

That reminds me of how the Angry Video Game Nerd describes god-awful background music in video games, only a lot tamer. - xandermartin98

4 The Trial (Super Mario Land 2)
5 "Have you ever wondered what's underneath a Goomba's shoe? ain't pretty. Those mushrooms are tasty, though." (Ask Goomba #2)
6 "Let me test what happens if you jump headfirst straight into a wall. (charges straight into the screen and breaks it) CALL AN AMBULANCE..." (Alien Olympics)
7 "It's kinda CUTE! I almost feel bad hitting the poor guy- OH GOD! WHAT THE HELL IS THAT THING? KILL IT! Okay, seriously, WHAT THE F*** was THAT about? And WHY was it in MY NINTENDO GAME?" (Wario Land 4)

Spoiled Rotten's true form of-a doom! Very SCARY! - xandermartin98

8 "BOOBIES! Hope that'll keep him distracted until he forgets." (Ask Goomba #2)
9 "If you're TheAmazingAtheist, then I suppose the alarm clock signals that it's time for you to go and shove a banana up your a$$ or something." (Wario Land 2)
10 "Once upon a time, Dreamworks made a good movie...but then they milked the s*** out of it and made a bunch of pointless sequels and it sucked." (Shrek)

The Contenders

11 "This is some Dr. Wily s*** right here." (Shrek)
12 Elmo On Drugs (Elmo In Grouchland)
13 Sound Room (Wario Land 4)
14 Chupa Chups Advertisements (Zool and Wario Land 4)
15 "These minecart segments aren't exactly Donkey Kong Country..." (Dragon's Lair)
16 "That is one sexy duck." (DuckTales)
17 "Does Dracula have a FETISH for spikes? Kinky bastard..." (Castlevania: The Adventure)
18 "This game has the most Down Syndrome plot I've ever seen for a video game." (Mario Pinball Land)
19 "With my big orange head, I may look like a clown; but you'd better watch out, cause I'm taking you down! Simply poetic." (Rock Em Sock Em Robots)
20 Punch-in-the-nuts Montage (Rock Em Sock Em Robots)
21 "E. T. uses his glowy finger to attack? Seriously? Well, at least it isn't something else that glows, if ya know what I mean..." (E. T.)
22 "Well, at least Wario isn't throwing poo, because let me tell you, there's nothing worse than getting dried crusty s*** stuck under your fingernails. You try to wash the smell out, but nope...still stinks of s***." (Wario Land 4)
23 "No saving any worlds or princesses here...just making a s***-ton of money. And that's why better than Mario." (Wario Land 4)
24 "Curse you, Dog, and your infinitely better videos!" (Ask Goomba)
25 "You don't wanna know what I eat every don't wanna know." (Super Mario Land 2)
26 Ninja Battle (Super Mario Land Revisited)
27 "What kind of crazy bastard has his name printed onto his own SHOE? I mean, seriously, you'd have to be an ego MANIAC to do something like that!" (Zool)
28 Jumping Into An Alien Giraffe's Mouth (Alien Olympics)
29 "I actually wouldn't mind if the Simpsons turned into The Walking Dead. That's a much better show than The Simpsons." (Simpsons Halloween)
30 Pipe Robot (Ask Goomba)
31 "Actually, I do happen to be chewing on a brick. What were you talking about again?"
32 "Mr. Blizzard? Mr. Blizzard? NO!!!"
33 Sapphire Passage Song (Wario Land 4)
34 "So this creepy old ghost lady comes out of nowhere, then she sucks a cat up her nose, then her face splits into four faces and they fly at you. Okay, seriously, were you following any of that? Because THAT is some RANDOM s***..." (Wario Land 4)

In the words of Snoop Dogg: "Smoke weed every day" - xandermartin98

35 "Does Wario Land 3 have a cool car? No? Didn't think so." (Wario Land 4)
36 "I'm actually having a pretty good time right now." (Wario Land 4)
37 "I CAN'T HANDLE THE PRESSURE. Well, actually, no, it's pretty easy. I had, like, four minutes left, which must be like a world record or something. I'm not going to check though, cause I like to feel good about myself." (Wario Land 4)
38 "OH MY GOD, it has j*** coming out of its EYES!" (Wario Land 4)
39 "Everyone loves mini-games! Especially WARIO of all people. So let's check them out! Ugh...yeah...I think I'm just gonna go play that boss." (Wario Land 4)
40 "Oh my god, Frogger, was that YOU in Super Castlevania 4!?" (Frogger)
41 P***s Throw (Alien Olympics)
42 "Balloon Boy? That has got to be the gayest video game title I've ever heard." (Balloon Boy)
43 "It's hard to believe that this is the same Conker from Conker's Bad Fur Day." (Conker's Pocket Tales)
44 "This guy must have a fetish for boats or something." (Conker's Pocket Tales)
45 "At least it's just s***** games coming out of that pipe, rather than actual s***."
46 "I'm gonna have to be honest...Super Mario Land 2 sucks." (Super Mario Land)
47 "Goombos? Give me a break. They're just Goombas in disguise if you ask me." (Super Mario Land)
48 Bomb Koopas (Super Mario Land)
49 "One day, the Struttin' Sams from Super Mario Sunshine will get their own game, and Nintendo will go bankrupt and die because of that game." (Worst Mario Enemies)
50 "King Bob-omb must have explosive diarrhea or something." (Worst Mario Bosses)
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