Non-Rude Words to Fire The Imagination Of Dirty-Minded People

I can't ejaculate any of these words without feeling I've said something I shouldn't.
The Top Ten
1 Stroke

My neighbour had a stroke while I was with him... See?

I guess this means I have a dirty mind. Yay.

2 Hump

Humps for the next five miles...

3 Mount
4 Pump
5 Organic

Say this with me. ,
"Organic cucumber"
Tut tut tut!

6 Mate
7 Helmet

Can't say this without thinking I'm in a "Carry On" film.

Helmet in the bush.

8 Probe

One of my teachers made this unfortunate quotes in class once. He described one of the more idiotic students as "a monkey-man who was there for probing." He then laughed, and then stopped laughing to himself, having just realised how wrong that sounded. Everyone else was laughing, though.

Can't get my tongue around the word...

9 Pound

I gave a pound to the young girl in the shop... For the grocery of course
.

10 Knob
The Contenders
11 Pianist
12 Lick
13 Sack
14 Mayonnaise

Is mayonnaise an instrument?

15 Screw

Q: How many elephants does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: Two, if you can find a light bulb big enough.

Hehehe sorry

Q: How many flies does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: Two, but how do you get them in there?

16 Moist
17 Finger

This one's used too often by people!
People can't Hear this Word with out making a joke

18 Prod
19 Swallow
20 Ride
21 Fur
22 Vegetable
23 Cheese
24 Feather
25 Jinx
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