NFL Week 13 Analysis

Randomator
It’s that time once again. Things began to get interesting this week. Let’s see what the Football Gods gave us this week.

New Orleans 10 (10-2). Dallas 13 (7-5)
Well well well what have we here? A Cowboys team putting the high flying Saints On upset alert? Yeah that’s right the Saints hit a brick wall in this contest. It’s name is the ‘Boys Defense. The real question is did Dallas really win this game or did the Refs win it for them? Either way in the distance I can hear the arrogance of Cowboys fans. There’s only one thing worse than Cowboys fans. It’s arrogant Cowboys fans... now we must suffer their rambling....Goddamnit

Arizona 20 (3-9). Green Bay 17 (4-7-1)
Seriously Packers? This was supposed to be an easy victory. How the hell did you lose this game? I know Zane Gonzalez and Mason Crosby both basically switched roles but still.. Losing to a tanking Arizona team with Rodgers at the helm of your offense is an absolute embarrassment! What’s worse is Arizona won another game they shouldn’t have. But don’t worry Green Bay! You might miss the playoffs and you can’t use the Aaron Rodgers injury excuse this time but there is one positive... Mike McCarthy has officially been axed!! It is a dawn of a new era in Green Bay!

Kansas City 40 (10-2). Oakland 33 (2-10)
The Chiefs continue to light up fireworks on offense with Patrick Mahomes, Travis Kelce, Kareem Hunt, and Tyreek Hill. Wait a second... Kareem Hunt abused a woman? (WHY? WHY? AND WHYYY? I know she dropped the N Word on you but you DO NOT do that. The media will side with the woman 10 out of 10 times. And also You DO NOT LIE to the Chiefs organization) Anyway back to the game...The offense carried on Like normal thanks to old reliable Travis Kelce but the secondary was once again dog sh*t. How the hell do you allow the Raiders to stay in this game? That alone is concerning! We should’ve beat up on them like 50-10!

Baltimore 26 (7-5). Atlanta 16 (4-8)
The Ravens continue to make a statement of their own by Letting Lamar Jackson run all over the Falcons and letting their defense lock Atlanta’s offense down all game long. Atlanta’s playoff hopes are essentially dead at this point while Baltimore’s are still very much alive. Harbaugh May Keep his job after all.. But don’t worry Falcons fans.. you still have Georgia! How did that one turn out? Blew a 14 point lead to Bama? Figures

New York Giants 30 (4-8). Chicago 27 (8-4) OT
So um what happened here Bears? Chase Daniel didn’t look at all like he did against Detroit. And you managed to lose to the G Men. This was one of those Lose lose games. Da Bears lost a game they should’ve won and the G men only hurt themselves by winning a game they shouldn’t have.

Miami 21 (6-6). Buffalo 17 (4-8)
This was a pretty bland game as both teams were kinda trying to give the other one a victory. In the end the Dolphins escape with an ugly game and surprising keep themselves alive in the playoff race.

Denver 24 (6-6). Cincinnati 10 (5-7)
If there’s one team who still has an outside chance at playoffs Denver is that team they have played solid the past few weeks thanks to Phillip Lindsay running all over the Bengals. Cincy Just Fire Hue Jackson and Marvin Lewis already. They aren’t helping you

LA Rams 30 (11-1) Detroit 16 (4-8)
Well there’s nothing much to say about this game. Detroit kept it close for 3 quarters. LA blew it open Stafford looked like the overpaid QB that he is. Rams won their cakewalk of a division thanks to San Fran and Arizona both sucking. Yay... I’m not surprised

Jacksonville 6 (4-8). Indianapolis 0 (6-6)
So now you decide to show up on defense Sacksonville? When you have almost no hope left? Of course. That D could’ve come in real handy a few weeks ago. Meanwhile Colts.. right as I started to have hope you just studded..

Houston. 29 (9-3) Cleveland 13 (4-7-1)
The Texans continue to be white hot and are looking better each week. The Browns got slapped back to reality as Baker struggled. Houston could make the AFC playoffs real interesting this year. Could we see them in the Super Bowl?

Tampa Bay 24 (5-7). Carolina 17 (6-6)
Well this was surprising. The Panthers have been on a rough losing streak as of recently. And you still play the Saints twice! If I were you I’d push that panic button right about now. Cam Newton must have caught turnover idus from the Bucs Quarterback carousel. 4 interceptions isn’t a great stat.

New York Jets 22 (3-9). Tennessee 26 (6-6)
How did this Titans team almost lose to the Jets? They basically had to rely on Mariota to carry them from down 16. What happened to the Titans who beat up on the Pats?

Seattle 43 (7-5). San Francisco 16 (2-10)
This game was an absolute beating for Seattle to the point you could call it manslaughter. Maybe it was karma for Richard Sherman making comments before the game. Either way the Seahawks now control their own destiny while the Niners are one of the first to go.

New England 24 (9-3). Minnesota 10 (7-4-1)
Well that was anticlimactic. What would’ve been a solid game last year turned out to be a mediocre contest. The Pats offensive unit was too much for Minnesota who just seems off. How do you only put up 10 on the Pats D? Bill Belichick yelling STFU seems like a pretty accurate message to Vikings fans. Because like in every big game Kirk Cousins underperforms. Just like this franchise as a whole

LA Chargers 33 (9-3). Pittsburgh 30 (7-4-1)
The Chargers sent a wake up message to anyone still asleep on them. The Steelers jumped out to an early 23-7 lead but Phillip Rivers wouldn’t go down without a fight and was able to rally the Bolts to an impressive win over a solid Steelers squad. And if you’re still sleeping on This Team you better wake up now. Because they are knocking on the Chiefs door looking to steal the division

Philadelphia 28 (6-6) Washington 13 (6-6)
This game was slow at first between two NFC East teams desperately trying to stay alive but in the end the Eagles were victorious and got a much needed win over a severely injured Redskins team who lost Colt McCoy. So next in line was Mark Sanchez who redeemed his buttfumble by handing off to AP who took it 90 yards to the house. But unfortunately it wasn’t enough to contain Philadelphia. Good job Eagles. Up next is the Cowboys... (please don’t have Joe Buck doing that game) you better win if you want any chance at winning the division

Comments

4-11-1 or bust! - PackFan2005

At least you’re getting a new head coach.lol - Randomator

Yeah, and two first round picks. - PackFan2005

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