Top Ten Places You Would Like to Dump Jackie Evancho

SelfDestruct
Hate Jackie Evancho, vote. She sucks. Worst musician alive

The Top Ten

1 Carnegie Hall

I'd love to see her at Carnegie Hall! She deserves the fans she has! - Turkeyasylum

Please bring this to number 1

Anyplace Jackie sings is the place to be! - BobG

Hey, she agreed to sing at the inauguration of a president who makes Richard Nixon look honest. I'll never buy anything she does.

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2 Grammy Awards podium

Saying "Thank-you! ". She's very polite.

Don't hold your breath...

3 On stage

Now this is where Jackie shines. No matter how much she puts into a studio album, performing in front of an audience pushes her delivery a step higher. Good pick!

Jackie refers to her live audiences as "her family". The audience greatly empowers her and more.

Look, I'm sure she's a very nice little girl. I just get tired of these people who think reality stars like her and Underwood and even Lambert to a point are the greatest thing since sliced bread. They can't write, they can't play instruments, and when you compare them to someone like the Beatles, the Stones, Dylan, or countless others, they just don't measure up. Can we keep it at least a little real?

I wish we could her send back in time on stage at the Woodstock festival. I'm sure that everybody on LSD would suddenly have a very bad trip!

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4 Disney Concert Hall

Now, this is where I'd like to see her perform. Carnegie Hall is old and stuffy. The Disney Concert Hall is made for her. Good pick!

5 Hollywood red carpet

She's already been on the red carpet at the Toronto Film Festival with Robert Redford, as well as the blue carpet at Cirque du Soleil's One Night for ONE DROP charity gala where she performed twice. Other red carpet appearances include Muhammad Ali's CelebrityFightNight charity (twice), and at the Songwriter's Hall of Fame induction dinner in New York City. I know that I'm forgetting some...

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6 In an active volcano

I Wouldn't Want To Throw Her In An Active Volcano However I'd Love To Throw Her Fans In Chernobyl And Let The Rot Over Their For A While And After They Get Cancer And Their About To Die I'll Throw The In To The Volcano

Now, these are pretty exciting places. Jackie's pretty adventuresome. She did hang at 100ft, and was lowered to 50 ft to perform at Cirque du Soleil's One Night for ONE DROP 2013, in the "O" Theater at the Bellagio, in Las Vegas. To be able to don a fire-suit, and be able to peek at a fiery cauldron would fit right in. She could write a school paper afterward.

7 On Venus

Sarah Brightman is going for a trip up the International Space Station, and having to ride a Russian rocket. If Jackie went to Venus, that would mean that the U.S. has finally gotten its act together, and able to get people off of the ground again, and past the Moon. This would be a good thing. Good idea.

Hopefully the fog is thick enough on Venus so we wouldn't hear her through it...

8 In a men's prison

'Wouldn't work. Prisons are very careful about mixing populations. But if she did end up in one, once again she'd just start singing, and everything would stop. She'd finish, get a standing ovation, and everyone would just shuffle back to their cells, humming her songs. The warden would give her a big thank-you, and invite her back. She gets invited back a lot.

I don't think that if you put her together with Charles Manson she would have a standing ovation and a big thank you. The best thing to do for her is becoming the new member of the Manson family.

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9 At the Grammys

Jackie will ultimately re-define what a Grammy encompasses. Its called raising the bar... AH I think Jackie placed the bar on Venus.

In her regular seat in the front row.

10 In a black hole

From our frame of reference, Jackie would appear to slow down as she approached the schwarzchild radius, and in effect become immortal. We would benefit from her presence forever!

Here we are again being able to get people off of the planet, and into space. There have been a lot of science fiction writers who have put stories to that theme: Larry Niven "The Hole Man", Jerry Pournelle in "He Fell into a Dark Hole", and Frederick Pohl, in "Gateway", where humans survive a partial tragedy near a black hole, and later find a vanished alien race living inside of one. A fascinating idea. Thanks!

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The Contenders

11 PBS Great Performances T.V. Special

Three PBS concert specials to date. Not many other performers can say that.

12 Hell

Nah, that wouldn't work. She'd show up and start singing, and everything would come to a grinding halt as everyone stopped to listen. Fires would go out, ice would melt, and apologies would be accepted. When she finished, she'd get a standing ovation. Then everyone would leave in a good mood, messing-up everything. No, this isn't a good idea.

Nah, that wouldn't work. She'd show up and start singing, and everything would come to a grinding halt as everyone stopped to listen. Fires would go out, ice would melt, and apologies would be accepted. When she finished, she'd get a standing ovation. Then everyone would leave in a good mood, messing-up everything. No, this isn't a good idea.

I dislike Jackie Evancho But I Wouldn't Dump Dump Her in Hell - TheKirbyCreeper999

If you would hear her singing all day,you will know for sure that you are in hell! It will be intolerable!

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13 Center stage
14 With Jackie Evancho fans

She frequently has meet & greets before a concert. And when she's on stage, she's with her fans.

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15 Singing a duet with Andrea Bocelli

Yes! She did this in Bangkok recently. Did a nice job, too. - BobG

16 In the Thames

It's too bad that she hasn't been back to the U.K. since her appearance on "Britain's Got Talent", where she sang Puccini's "Nessum Dorma". I could see her floating on a Thames Sailing Barge, giving a private concert to the passengers. Cool!

Obviously since it is "in" the Thames, she would have to fall overboard...

17 Into the Earth's core

Silly! No one can get there! It's liquid metal on the outside, and crystalline in the center, and rotates, giving us the magnetic shield that protects us from solar wind and clouds of neutrons and protons from coronal mass ejections. And it's really hot. Silly!

You're right, it is silly. Gee, and the rest of these all make so much sense...

18 With her fanbase
19 In a shark infested sea

At the beach in Malibu is one of her favorites. Her friend (and producer) David Foster has had her there as his guest. Pretty soon she'll be able to buy her own house there. Where do you live, SelfDestruct?

Again, the location is "in" a shark infested sea, along with Foster, I hope...

20 In a dumpster

Here SelfDestruct is getting down to his old tacky self. 15 year old girl in a dumpster? Just put your ear-buds in, punch-up some 50-Cent, and find a painted curb to grind.

21 Into the sun

Tarja Turunen has already done it.

22 In a sewer

As a part of being in Paris to perform, now doubt. Good thinking! The Paris sewers date back to ancient times, Good prep for another school paper.

23 A stage

Yes everyone would applaud. Standing ovations by young and old. Wheel chairs and canes won't hold us down.

Everywhere is a stage for her: from NPR's office (Tiny Desk Concert) to hanging 50 ft above the "O" Theater stage at the Bellagio in Las Vegas, to Detroit Stadium where she sang the National Anthem on Thanksgiving Day, to the Capitol steps where she's performed at A Capitol Fourth, the National Christmas Tree lighting, and on Memorial Day. Anywhere's a stage when you're good!

I agree but only if it's on stage for the punk 1977 revival concert!

V 1 Comment
24 In a bear infested forest

Jackie loves animals. She would probably adopt a few.

Camping in the woods with her family. Millions of people do it every year. Nice pick!

25 On Tour with David Foster & Friends

Jackie will be joining up with David Foster (again) in August, in Malaysia. Always magical when these two get together. - BobG

26 In The Ruins Of Reactor Number 4 In Chernobyl

Thanks to whoever added this. This is what I'd do

27 Singing at the Proms in London
28 In a piranha lake

Given a chance, she'd probably swim in clear water no matter where it is. Teddy Roosevelt is mostly responsible for the fearsome reputation of the piranha, follow his highly-embellished "Through the Brazilian Wilderness" story.

29 Male rugby players' changing rooms

They'd say "Hey, little girl. Wait outside". Rugby players are good blokes.

30 In SelfDestruct's bedroom

I can see it now,
SelfDestruct on his knees, in tears, when he hears Jackie sing and finally gets it.

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31 By a microphone
32 Her home

She likes home, and likes being with her family. Nice pick.

33 In Ponyville
34 In My Living Room!

Then I'd never leave home!

35 On a World Tour
36 Singing a duet with Amy Lee

Throw in Carrie Underwood while you're at it.

That would be awesome! You could the three most overrated singers, all in one place...

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37 Wonderland

Maybe she would find some magic mushrooms there and after eating them realize that she's doing crappy music. This would be really wonderful.

38 In a tornado
39 In Syria

They would fighting against the believers and fanatics of Jackie Evancho. At least their cause will be right and justified!

They will think that the Americans are really crazy if we do that.

40 In a horrendous space kablooie
41 In a boiling sulphuric acid bath
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List Stats

100 votes
41 listings
3 years, 232 days old

Top Remixes (8)

1. Carnegie Hall
2. Disney Concert Hall
3. Grammy Awards podium
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1. Carnegie Hall
2. On stage
3. Grammy Awards podium
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1. Carnegie Hall
2. Grammy Awards podium
3. A stage
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