Top Ten Random and Amusing Snippets of Converstation

Lunch time in central London. People rushing by in a blur, snippets hanging in the air, ready to be plucked and put into my notebook. Here are my top ten. If you've heard any, feel free to add.

The Top Ten

Man on mobile: Yeah, she's still on the job... What? No it's still very tender.

I can only imagine what that conversation was about! - Britgirl

Christ, woman. You know I hate egg mayonnaise!
It's not all that big. I've seen bigger!

I can only assume the American tourist was talking about The Shard... - Britgirl

They were squashed THREE TIMES!

Would have loved to have followed that gentleman to hear the rest of it. - Britgirl

Take it! Take it! Me back's going!

Yes...and so is my hearing, pal. - Britgirl

Teenager on phone: 'Sup blud? Sorted! Where you at? Stay rooted, me come check ya.


Translates in English as: hello my good man. Everything is fine. Where are you? Stay there and I'll come to you. - Britgirl

You open a can of beans, right? Only to find sodding mushrooms!

OK, this is just weird. Who knows what was going on in that guy's crazy, crazy world. - PositronWildhawk

No, you imbecile, we are NOT WATCHING ME GET AN ENEMA!

Yes, I was there. It was aloud, it was genuine, it was in public, it was at about 80 decibels, and I was one of several people staring at him. I laugh about it long afterwards. - PositronWildhawk

Oui is "yes" in French

Queue here for basic French lessons. - Britgirl

NO WAY! I WOULD HAVE NEVER GUESSED! REALLY? - Epekov

Yeah... bunch of bankers

At least that's what it sounded like... - Britgirl

The Contenders

There's nothing I can do for you, sir; you ate it.
On phone: Cats do not talk. They have never been able to talk, and unless they become superintelligent, they never will. No, Garfield does not count.

I don't know why this is funny. Haha! - funnyuser

Ma'am, we can't law enforce your cheeseburger!
She's getting too big for my liking!
No, it's a vulture!

My brother tends to talk in his sleep. One time, as usual, I had no idea what he was saying, but I caught "No, it's a vulture! " and thought, peculiar thoughts crossing his mind, as usual. Any thoughts that do cross his mind, though, take a long and winding road. - PositronWildhawk

This reminds me of Victor Meldrew when he sleeptalks. He tends to say: "Not with the pastry! " That made me laugh! - Britgirl

From Russia With Love
He made me lick it
I told you, my bookcase is not ready yet!
Hello!!! That's penny with a capital P!
I told you already, he has a British accent! Wait......there's a McDonalds to the left, right?
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