Top Ten Reasons Hair Metal Is a Poser Metal Subgenre

ThatStrangeKid42
Think metalcore/deathcore is ruining metal? Think again - hair metal bands got the job done first! Here are the reason why.

The Top Ten

1 Hair metal bands have the most ridiculous image.

Looks shouldn't matter in music. They can wear whatever they want. If you claim that metal is more about music than fashion, yet trash on bands for wearing makeup and hairspray or baggy sweatpants and baseball caps instead of the usual "manly" leather jackets and battle vests, well, you're just contradicting your claims. - yungstirjoey666

Haha this triggers boomers so much

No hair metal is cool. You guys don't have good taste. - Zookatoo

One of most stupid biased lists on this site. - HEAVYMETALTHUNDER12345

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2 They aren't actually heavy.

Most glam metal bands don't try to be heavy in the first place. And some bands, such as Twisted Sister and Skid Row, are kind of heavy. - yungstirjoey666

Hair metal does not work well as a metal subgenre, but they can be lit when compared to most pop rock bands. - yungstirjoey666

Some songs are heavy. - MegadethFan07

Seriously, I could fall asleep listening them. Now, I have nothing against soft music or ballads, but if your music is going to sound like you're not even trying to strum your guitar, PLEASE DON'T CALL YOURSELF A METAL BAND. - ThatStrangeKid42

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3 The lyrics are all the same.

That's the same argument that metal haters say to metal music - yungstirjoey666

They aren't as complex and diverse as other metal sub-genres,but called it all the same is stupid. - HEAVYMETALTHUNDER12345

Iron Maiden lyrics- "they summoned me over to join in to the dead of the dead, into the circle I followed them, into the middle I was led"
Motley Crüe lyrics - "Girls girls girls long legs and burgundy lips, girls down on sunset strip, girls red lips fingertips

All the songs sound like the cheesiest 80's pop music and all they sing about is how they get girls.-DarkBoi-X

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4 Music and lyrical themes are not metal

Neither should "Breaking the Law," but you know what? Lyrics don't really define a metal song much. - yungstirjoey666

@Christangrant Buddy! you need to shut up or stop copying metal treasure's comments.

Sure, some of the bands with that 80's hair style played metal, most of them were just pop rock.

First, 99% of their songs are based on blues and not on classical music which immediately speaks hard rock. Not metal. For that reason ACDC, GNR and Led Zep were labeled as hard rock and not metal. How about Poison then?
Second, metal doesn't focus on having fun. So hair "metal" lyrics also fall into typical hard rock lyrical themes.

Metal and hair/glam are opposites. The term 'hair/glam metal' bears logical and musical contradictions. It's a misconception and it's time to admit those bands are not metal from any viewpoint. By calling themselves 'metal' they only gave metal a bad name.
- Metal_Treasure

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5 They're basically the 1980s versions of Black Veil Brides.

Now we're just gonna compare them with other hated bands? We may as well compare them with Nickelback while we're at it. - yungstirjoey666

Nope,i see no similiarity. - HEAVYMETALTHUNDER12345

Motley Crue and BVB said the same thing: " we're such outcasts because we have a huge mainstream fanbase. But seriously, it's okay because we dress like 12 year old scene girls! " - ThatStrangeKid42

This is one of the best lists that I have ever seen. - KoolGuy2218

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6 The bands only play for money. The bands only play for money. The Band was a Canadian-American roots rock group formed in 1965 . Which originally consisting of Rick Danko (bass guitar, double bass, fiddle, vocals), Levon Helm (drums, mandolin, guitar, vocals), Garth Hudson (keyboards, saxophones, trumpet), Richard Manuel (piano, drums, vocals) and Robbie Robertson ...read more.

Who cares if they play for money? They still make music. - yungstirjoey666

THE BAND IS A GLAM METAL BAND CONFIRMED! - MegadethFan07

This can be said for a lot of other bands too. - HEAVYMETALTHUNDER12345

You know what? Stop calling yourself metal. Just stop. Now, leave the word "hair" in your name, but add the word "pop" onto that. We only need to take away your makeup for you to be another Backstreet Boys ripoff. And NO, that's not a good thing. - ThatStrangeKid42

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7 Too many fangirls.

Fanbases should not interfere with the bands themselves. - yungstirjoey666

When Bring Me The Horizon wanted fangirls, they looked to hair metal bands for advice. - ThatStrangeKid42

8 Band members are obnoxious.

Dave Mustaine, Varg Vikernes, etc. - yungstirjoey666

Dave Mustaine and Kerry King too. - HEAVYMETALTHUNDER12345

Especially the singers. I'd rather be locked in a room with Once Direction than have to deal with Nikki Sixx's huge ego. I'd prefer neither option, but at least with 1D I would have the chance to punch Harry Styles in the face. - ThatStrangeKid42

9 Annoying singing voices.

I could say the same with Dave Mustaine (he's an amazing guitar player and songwriter though) - yungstirjoey666

Not really.Not as good as the metal singers from the other sub-genres,but they were not annoying. - HEAVYMETALTHUNDER12345

And you think you're even remotely screaming? No, you're just annoying. Even Kellin Quinn would have a heart attack listening to you sing. - ThatStrangeKid42

10 They have no musical skill.

They may not be as skillful as real metal bands, but to say that they have no musical talent is an overstatement. - yungstirjoey666

They are talented, I will give them that - ryanrimmel

I've heard more complexity in a rap song. I'm not joking. - ThatStrangeKid42

Agreed with ryanrimmel, its not like that they are talentless. Is Axl Rose talentless? or slash? - zxm

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The Contenders

11 They think they're hocking when they're really just stupid.

You want shocking? Cannibal Corspe, Dying Fetus, Carnifex, Death's first album. Not this gender-confused sports mascot crap. Hey, Dee Snider! YOU ARE A MALE. YOU HAVE A PENIS, NOT A VAGINA. So stop acting like you don't know the difference. - ThatStrangeKid42

They're nowhere near as shocking compared to acts like Rammstein and Marilyn Manson.

12 They are precursors of nu-metal and metalcore and all mallcore music.

Don't blame 80s bands for metalcore and nu metal. In fact, most third wave bands got their influence from Pantera. - yungstirjoey666

Look at Pantera mate,not hair metal. - HEAVYMETALTHUNDER12345

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List Stats

12 listings
4 years, 304 days old

Top Remixes

1. Hair metal bands have the most ridiculous image.
2. They aren't actually heavy.
3. The lyrics are all the same.
ThatStrangeKid42
1. Music and lyrical themes are not metal
2. They aren't actually heavy.
3. The bands only play for money.
Metal_Treasure

WRemix

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