Top 10 Reasons Um Jammer Lammy's Brain is Sexier Than Lana Loud's

The Top Ten

1 Has been factually proven, albeit by fanfiction, to have its own internal control room that allows intruders to hijack her body and turn her into a sex puppet

As if the Internet hadn't done that already (cough, furry fandom, cough)

2 Much easier to sneak into, crawl around on, make out and have sex with while she's asleep

More importantly, you also get to worm your way INSIDE it

Pervert list

3 Has a much bigger and cleaner pair of ear canals leading into it

But still with plenty of delicious wax to slather all over yourself

4 Belongs to a character that is sexually attractive, as well as legally aged for sex

5 Is bigger and has more wrinkles in it because it belongs to an older woman

6 Lammy really puts the "nervous" in "central nervous system"

And it's part of why she's so adorable, am I right (swoons)

7 Lammy's brain is more delicate, soft, spongy, sensitive and ticklish

I wonder if licking it will stimulate its tickle sensors too...HMM

8 Lammy's brain is hot pink like a delicious medium-rare steak

9 Lammy is smarter, albeit not by much

10 All Lammy ever thinks about is classic rock-and-roll music and hot lesbian cat-on-sheep action; all Lana ever thinks about is mainly mud, alligators and frogs

I already know very well what I'M gonna be downloading off of her memory-bank hard drive, if you catch my drift (wink, wink)

The Contenders

11 Has its very own MBTI diagram

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