Reasons Why Pepsi Is a Threat to Freedom

PositronWildhawk submitted a list called "The Most Preposterous Political/Social Issue List Ideas". One of the ideas was "Reasons Why Pepsi Is A Threat To Freedom". I actually ended up laughing myself to tears just thinking, "What if that really was as real list? " I had to do it. I just had to. So now I will sit back, take a sip of my Coke, and begin to create the most ridiculous list ever seen!

The Top Ten

1 When you ask for Coke at a restaurant, and the waiter says, "Pepsi okay?" you feel forced to say yes.

Oh jeez. This has happened to everybody. It's really embarrassing. Because you kinda want to say "No, I'll have something else." But that waiter stands there, giving you the puppy eyes, and you can't help but feel a little sensitive. "Okay, I'll take the Pepsi." - ThatStrangeKid42

Then you ask, "Do you have Royal Crown Cola? "

2 If you want to buy a Pepsi at a theme park, it costs well over $3.

This is pretty much every drink at theme parks. But now Six Flags and Cedar Fair have these Coca-Cola Freestyle stations, with over 100 Coke flavors - and you can pay just little extra for free refills! Pepsi doesn't do that. You want a Pepsi after riding that coaster? You have to get a whole new cup. Without the lid, of course. - ThatStrangeKid42

3 No matter how much you look, you'll never find a Pepsi with your name on it.

That's because Pepsi plan to make us all the same entity, incapable of subconscious though, creativity and self-awareness. - PositronWildhawk

It doesn't matter whether Pepsi has name on it or not. Coke never has "with Sean" on it so I don't really care. - Juan-Luis

Share a Coke with Bob. Share a Coke with Helga. Share a Coke with Kim Jon Un. You can't share Pepsi like you can share Coke. - ThatStrangeKid42

Pepsi doesn't want you to share Pepsis so that way you drink so much Pepsi on your own that Pepsi corporates will make everyone obese util they're the only ones who are mobile! - Turkeyasylum

4 PepsiCo is a strong supporter of genetically-modified crops.

I'm actually being serious about this one. - ThatStrangeKid42

5 People who like Pepsi better are practically brainwashed into thinking Pepsi is better.

Hey Pepsi fans! Care to admit that you were a little pressured into Pepsi? Huh? Giving you that "badass nonconformist" feel? Let me tell you the truth. Free-thinkers actually drink obscure root beer brands that no one has heard of. I've been drinking Frostie's Root Beer since before it was cool. - ThatStrangeKid42

6 Pepsi's logo/color scheme is too generic.

Seriously? You're just gonna copy the American flag? The American colors are just a re-arrangement of the U.K. pepsi is not British. You can't even say "Pepsi" good with a British accent! I bet BritGirl is reading this list and trying it right now. I mean, it works with an Australian accent, maybe..."crikey! A wild Pepsi! " Gosh, Americans have boring accents. Even worse than our beverages. - ThatStrangeKid42

It's the French flag! Napoleon is fighting back with Pepsi! - PositronWildhawk

7 Diet Pepsi caused some controversy during the 2011 New York Fashion Week, when they made a skinnier Diet Pepsi bottle to imply "skinny is better."

This is true. They really did hurt some butthurt people's feelings by promoting a skinnier bottle of their diet soda at a fashion convention. - ThatStrangeKid42

8 PEPSI might stand for "Pepsi's Economic Policy is Super Ignorant"

I always thought it was Penis Extension Potion: Sabotages Immediately. - PositronWildhawk

I just made that up. How about you comment here, posting your own idea of what PEPSI might stand for! - ThatStrangeKid42

PEPSI: People Extradite Possibly Stupid Idiots, like the creator of this list. - Juan-Luis

9 Pepsi is named after pepsin, which is a digestive chemical used in its recipe.

There is no freedom. Pepsi will lock you away in that restroom. Forever. - ThatStrangeKid42

I mean coke is named after cocaine so...

10 Pepsi breaks obesity controversy

People who blame Pepsi for their obesity are hallucinating. Its all that excessive food they eat causing it.

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List Stats

10 listings
4 years, 104 days old

Top Remixes

1. When you ask for Coke at a restaurant, and the waiter says, "Pepsi okay?" you feel forced to say yes.
2. If you want to buy a Pepsi at a theme park, it costs well over $3.
3. No matter how much you look, you'll never find a Pepsi with your name on it.


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