Top 10 Shower Thoughts About Santa Claus

The Top Ten

1 If Santa gives coal to naughty children, he's increasing the risk of global warming

Merry Christmas! Global warming for you, young lad!

2 The moral of Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer is that nobody likes you unless you are useful to them

Exactly! It's really not a good lesson to teach kids.

3 In the movies where parents don't beleive in Santa, where do they think the presents come from?

4 Most of Santa's presents are made in China, a communist country. Therefore Santa is a communist

5 If Dobby from Harry Potter got clothes on Christmas from Santa, he would be freed

But there is nothing about him in Harry Potter except for decoration at the Yule Ball.
He can use magic, use floo powder.

6 Santa's name is an anagram of Satan

That's an oldie

7 If Santa keeps a track of naughty kids every year, they year doesn't start after January 1, so you can spend 6 days doing whatever you want without being punished

8 No matter how many kids are waiting to see Santa, you can't open up another line with another Santa

9 Santa is a privacy invader

Yep, it is creepy how he watches you on how you behave. Why can't we just leave it to our parents?

10 Millions of kids actually think a man dressed up as Santa is the real deal

The Contenders

11 Santa never knew that you could make diamonds from coal

12 Santa is an animal abuser

13 Santa is actually a robber

14 Santa likes to stay outside because he likes the cold weather

15 He has a nameless wife

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