Billboard Hot 100 Year End 2016, RANKED

Spark_Of_Life
2016 was a year split down the middle. It had some of the best songs I've ever head, and also some of the worst, which require, at best, brain bleach. But no use stalling. Let's jump right in.

(One quick note: I used a * out of 10 system instead of a * out of 5 system)

S*** TIER

100: One Call Away: Charlie Puth might be the worst singer ever. The egotistical lyrics and the whining pianos... gross.
99: Tiimmy Turner: I can appreciate the message, I just hate digging for it under diet Future vocals and horrible instrumentals.
98: Cut It: Repetitive trash.
97: Down in the DM: No one will remember this in five years.
96: 2 Phones: Kevin Gates, one of many rappers with one top 20 hit we'll never hear from again.
95: Really Really: Who?
94: Wicked: Is that a human being?

HORRIBLE TIER

93: 7 Years: Hypocritical, nursery-piano, pandering, terribly-sung garbage.
92: Don't Mind: Racist, sexist garbage.
91: Back to Sleep: Creepy garbage.
90: Low Life: Not even a mediocre Weeknd feature can save this.
89: White Iverson: You remember this song or this guy? Me neither.
88: For Free: I honestly don't remember anything about this.
87: Middle: Worst. Drop. Ever.
86: Watch Me: The only thing keeping this from the high 90's is nostalgia.

REALLY BAD TIER:

85: We Don't Talk Anymore: Or, Two Awful Singers, one Synth Flute.
84: Pop Style: zzz....
83: Don't: Forgettable.
82: Panda: The good instrumentals (bought for $200, by the way) saves this from a 1.
81: All The Way Up: Who asked for a Fat Joe "comeback"?
80: Let Me Love You: Horrible when I first heard it in August, has only gotten worse since then.
79: I Hate U I Love You: Olivia O' Brien saves this from being a COMPLETE disaster.
78: Treat You Better: Without the admittedly good instrumentals, this creepy, pandering mess would be way lower.
77: Me Too: According to this song, Meghan Trainor has an ego the size of a small African country.
76: Too Good: Rihanna saves Drake from the awful lyrics, but good instrumentals.
75: Gold: Or, YTP, the Song.
74: Sit Still, Look Pretty: Or, Hideaway, the s***ty version.

BAD TIER:

73: Exchange: This song definitely exists.
72: No Limit: Usher, what happened?
71: My House: I want to like this, but I just can't.
70: Let It Go: Whiny, but I appreciate the subject matter.
69: Me, Myself, and I: Or, Bebe Rexha in her only good vocal performance.
68: Work From Home: I still can't get over those creepy breathing noises. Also, retire, Camilla.

PASSABLE TIER:

67: Jumpman: JUMPMAN JUMPMAN JUMPAN
66: Controlla: DRAKE
65: Love Yourself: Easily top 10 material... if Ed Sheeran had sung it.
64: Hands To Myself: No, Selena, you can't be sexy.
63: Wildest Dreams: Something about this, despite the great vocals, doesn't sit well with me.
62: Unsteady: A song.
61: Lost Boy: Most confusing metaphor ever.
60: Cold Water: Whiny Bieber Drags Down MO in Otherwise Great Song. News At 11.
59: Closer: Oh, how badly this has aged.

OK TIER:

58: Antidote: This is acutally OK?
57: Die A Happy Man: Thinking Out Loud Ripoff.
56: Perfect: History is much better, but this is ok.
55: I Know What You Did Last Summer: When are we going to stop naming songs after horror movies?
54: Can't Stop the Feeling!: Most overplayed song of 2016.It's ok, though.
53: NO: Am I the only one that doesn't completely hate this?
52: Same Old Love: Same thing for this?
51: Needed Me: It got better over time, but it's still very egotistical.

GOOD TIER

50: Luv: I don't Luv this, I just like it.
49: Oui: Good while it lasted.
48: Humble and Kind: Good message, but slightly boring.
47: See You Again: Good message, but horrendously overplayed.
46: H.O.L.Y: The only Florida Georgia Line song that doesn't make me want to puke.
45: One Dance: Everyone hates this with a burning passion, and I don't know why.
44: All In My Head: It aged better, but it would be an easy 3-2 without Fetty Wap.
43: Stitches: Why do I find this good?
42: Just Like Fire: Great vocals, good instrumentals...but bland verses and that cancerous rap in the middle.
41: Broccoli: Lil Yachty drags this masterpiece down from an easy top 10 position.
40: What Do You Mean: Slightly boring tropical house, but doesn't suffer from nearly as many problems as Let Me Love You.

REALLY GOOD TIER:

39: Say It: Good instrumentals.
38: Stressed Out: Overplayed, but good while it lasted.
37: 679: Or, a Slightly Worse But Still Definitely Good Quality Trap Queen
36: Work: Somehow, I got past the stuttering chorus and found a surprisingly good song buried there.
35: Sorry (Justin Bieber): Justin's a little s***, but I'm a sucker for horns.
34: Can't Feel My Face: I should like this more than I do.
33: Sucker For Pain: I only just heard this for the list. If given more time, this probably would have been higher.
32: Cake By The Ocean: That's right, I don't hate this. At all.
31: Never Forget You: I prefer Lush Life, but this is definitely a high quality piece.
30: Never Be Like You: Shouldn't work, but it does.
29: Dangerous Woman: Sung by any other, this would be higher.
28: This Is What You Came For: Repetitive, but it holds a special place in my heart.
27: When We Were Young: I should like THIS more than I do. But still...

GREAT TIER:

26: Send My Love: Catchy and fun.
25: Into You: I like this.
24: Heathens: Dark, moody masterpiece.
23: Sorry (Beyoncé): Not the best off of Lemonade, but it's still great.
22: Close: Nick Jonas and Tove Lo: What more could I ask for?
21: Hello: HELLO FROM THE OTHER SIDE
20: Cheap Thrills: With Sean Paul.
19: Like I'm Gonna Lose You: Meaningful and extremely heartfelt.
18: Hideaway: I should hate this. But I like it.
17: Pillowtalk: I should hate this. But I love it.
16: Ex's and Oh's: It's really refreshing to see a singer with a little personality.

AMAZING TIER:
15: The Hills: Dark, catchy, and amazing.
14: Hotline Bling: Yes, I know, putting this this high is very controversial. But I love the elevator-music instrumentals.
13: On My Mind: Higher if it wasn't for the bridge.
12: I Took A Pill In Ibiza: Amazing Remix only, please.
11: Lean On: It's only gotten better since last year.
10: Adventure of a Lifetime: Who knew Coldplay could do disco so good?
9: Starving: I love this and I don't know why.
8: Hymn For The Weekend: Why do people call this "bad"? It's certainly amazing.
7: Side to Side: Catchy and dirty in all the right ways.
6: Roses: Extremely heartfelt and memorable.
5: Ride: It takes a lot of effort to be so deep and meaningful while also being catchy.
4: In The Night: One of his best, second only too...
3: Starboy: ...this amazing collab with Daft Punk.
2: Here: This might be one of the best songs I've ever heard.
1: Don't Let Me Down: I...I love this. So much. The meaningful vocals, the amazing drop, and the great beats all come together to produce...the best song of 2016.

2016 gets a 605/1000 for me. or a D-.

Yay.

Comments

Well. Guess it's a matter of time before I do mine - ProPanda

Why is Me Too only a 3/10 - WonkeyDude98

Cause it's really bad, but I think the 23 songs before it are worse. - Spark_Of_Life

I remember when you really hated Broccoli lol

We were all there. - WonkeyDude98

I actually used to hate Broccoli song so much, that it used to be the only thing blocking Work From Home from being my pick for worst hit song of 2016. Now, instead of angering me, it just doesn't affect me. - NiktheWiz

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