Top Ten SpongeBob SquarePants Quotes

The Top Ten

1 "Is mayonnaise an instrument?" - Patrick, Band Geeks

Patrick's naive stupidity is so great, one of the show's best quotes besides when SpongeBob tries to say hash slinging slasher and butchers it tremendously

This is one of my favorite quotes, IT'S SO FUNNY! Should stay number 1 forever.

Is mayonnaise an instrument? No Patrick, mayonnaise is not an instrument. Horseradish is not an instrument either.

No Patrick mayonnaise is not an instrument. - Squidward - Aaa2

2 "I love you" - Patrick, Chocolate With Nuts

Yes, the mayonnaise quote is great, but I think that it is a little overrated and undeserving of the top spot. This quote was just so funny though. - RalphBob

Ahahaahahaah. Good one Patrick!



3 "What? What did he say!?" - Mable's Mother, Chocolate With Nuts

My sister and mom always laugh at the end of Chocolate With Nuts because of the ending.

4 "CHOCOLATE!" - Tom, Chocolate With Nuts

Chocolate guy has the best line ever

Lol that was funny made me laugh as a kid

This one is pure gold.


5 "My Leg!" - Fred, Multiple Episodes

They finally did an episode.

Legendary quote - Randomator

That is so funny!

Iconic catch phrase

6 "Is this the part where we start kicking?" - SpongeBob, Band Geeks

Ooh! I want to do some kicking!

7 "Who you callin' Pinhead?" - Patrick, Survival of the Idiots

How is this just not higher, I'm pretty sure this is better than #9 - McKing1003

Just look at that face. - higgsboson2142

I laugh every single time.

I can't stand his reaction

8 "Finland!" - Patrick, Frankendoodle

Laugh out loud This made me laugh so hard

Where does Patrick even get Finland from THERE UNDERWATER!

9 "Once I met this guy who knew this guy who knew this guy who knew this guy who knew this guy who knew this guy who knew this guy who knew this guy who knew this guy." - SpongeBob, The Camping Episode

This is the best on your list,but I think you missed all the best quotes like, "that's not a circle it's an oval", "I'm so cold I'm shivering", and,"I want the warm NOW".

Who knew this guy's cousin... - RockStarr

IS you STUPID? That them there is the realest quote of the time, of all time up inadadadahere!

10 "East? I thought you said 'weast'." - Patrick, Arrgh!

Kanye Weast. It sounds better actually. - Synchronocity

The Contenders

11 "I'm sorry sir, but my sensors indicate that you are indeed a weenie" - Robot Weenie, No Weenies Allowed
12 "I am 100% ma-male" - SpongeBob, Pre-Hibernation Week
13 "You should switch it to Wumbo" - Patrick, Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy IV

Brilliant Take it to the Bank Patrick! - Curti2594

I wumbo you wumbo he she me WUMBO the study of WUMBO wumboing its first grade SpongeBob

Wumbo. it was coined by Frankie J. Wumbo in the early 1960s, meaning "The best quote."

14 "Whoever’s the owner of the white sedan, you left your lights on." - Patrick, Band Geeks
15 "No, this is Patrick!" - Patrick, Big Pink Loser

Is this the Krusty Krab? - Randomator

16 "You don't need a license to drive a sandwich." - SpongeBob, The SpongeBob SquarePants Movie

I laughed so hard on that one!

The movie was amazing

17 "Nobody calls me tubby!" - Patrick, No Weenies Allowed
18 "F is for friends who do stuff together." - SpongeBob, F.U.N.
19 "That was a circle. It has to be an oval." - SpongeBob, The Camping Episode
20 "Does this look unsure to you?" - Squidward, Just One Bite
21 "He's Squidward, he's Squidward, you're Squidward? I'm Squidward! Are there any other Squidwards I should know about?" - Patty, Opposite Day
22 "With cheese Mr. Squidward. With cheese." - Mr. Krabs, The Spongebob Squarepants Movie

A hundred and one dollars for a Krabby Patty?

23 "If I hear The Bikini Bottom Municipal Anthem, I can’t help but take off all my clothes and dance around in my underwear." - Squidward, Little Yellow Book
24 "Heart on stick must die!" - Patrick, Valentine's Day
25 "I’ll have you know I stubbed my toe last week while watering my spice garden, and I only cried for 20 minutes." - SpongeBob, No Weenies Allowed
26 "Well, Mr. Krabs. Do you want to know what I think? Arrgh! Regga flebba breeka brecka smullen-ellen Mr. Krabs! Yegga hegga mergin wallet! Dimmy middy spend! Rivy flivy diva shiva Mr. Krabs Wallet!" - SpongeBob, Krusty Love

Don't know what this means. Don't think I WANT to know what this means. But, whatever this means... It can't be good. Which is why I laughed so hard at this.

27 "Hello. I like money" - Mr. Krabs,, The SpongeBob SquarePants Movie
28 "Too bad that didn't kill me" - Squidward, Band Geeks
29 "I hate all of you" - Squidward, Karate Choppers
30 "Nosferatu!" - Spongebob, Squidward, and Hash Slinging Slasher - Graveyard Shift

IS you STUPID. THat them there is the best quote of all the time inanadadadhere!

- John Lennon

31 “Squidward smells... good” - SpongeBob, Sailor Mouth
32 "Patrick screams" - Patrick, Band Geeks

That part happens when Sandy turns Patrick into a trumpet.

33 "The inner machinations of my mind are an enigma." - Patrick, The Secret Box

This takes the cake. Hilarious!

34 "We'll it may be stupid, but it's also dumb!" - Patrick, The Camping Episode
35 "Once, there was an ugly barnacle. He was so ugly that everyone died. The end." - Patrick, Something Smells

My friend and I love this quote

36 "You know what's funnier than 24? 25." - SpongeBob, New Student Starfish

ONLY 46?

37 "Have you finished those errands?" - SpongeBob, Squid's Day Off
38 "Liar! Liar! Plants for hire!" - Patrick, Life of Crime
39 "Ya! Buns and thighs!" - Random German Guy, Life of Crime
40 "Big. Meaty. Claws!" - Shark Guy, Band Geeks

The shark guy's name is actually confirmed to be Harold. - Goatworlds

Well these claws aren't just for attracting mates.

No people, let's be smart and bring it off.

Bring it on old man, bring it on!

41 "Noooo! My name's not Rick!" - Patrick, The Fry Cook Games


42 "Where's the leak, ma'am?" - Patrick, Frankendoodle

Yaas. this is top ten material

43 "I can't see my forehead." - Patrick, Pretty Patties

The name of the episode is actually "Patty Hype" - DrayTopTens

My friend and I say it ALL THE TIME

44 "So much later, that the old narrator got tired of waiting, and they had to hire a new one" - new narrator, Can You Spare a Dime?

I wouldn't consider this a quote - Randomator

45 "Victory Screech!" - SpongeBob, The Algae's Always Greener
46 "If I were to die due to the carelessness of a friend, well that would just be ok" - SpongeBob, Dying for Pie

I love how squidward doesn't tell SpongeBob what happens

This is priceless I❤️this one

47 "This is a hotel?" - Patrick, Krusty Towers

This is a hotel?

This is a hospital? - mattstat716

48 "Nice ******** day!" - SpongeBob, Sailor Mouth
49 "Hey would you keep it down in there? I'm trying to concentrate" - Guy who looks like a hand, Greasy Buffoons

This is actually from Model Sponge, not Greasy Buffons.

50 "LEDALEDALEDALE!" - Patrick, Shanghaied
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