Top 10 Stupidest Questions

The Top Ten
1 My 11 year old brother hasn't had his first period yet. Why?

Um, okay, whoever would ask a question as counterintuitive as this one has serious issues.

Umm... I think you and I need to have a little chat...

It takes forever for boys to have their first period.

... Let's have a "chat", now shall we? With your mother.

2 Where'sthespacebar?

You've found the apostrophe and the shift key (for the question mark) but not space?

Gee, if you're using an Apple device and you don't know where it is, you're in trouble.

3 When does the 9:00pm news start?

It starts at 3:AM in the year 3012, and the broadcast would say "According to Gravity Falls, the world will end this year. Time Baby, save us all! "

Read the title of the news again, and this time, focus on '9:00pm'.

Well, I don't know. But, it's definitely not at 9:00 PM.

It's right there in the title of the news!

4 HOW DO YOU TURN OFF CAPS LOCK!?

If you don't know how to turn it off, how did you turn it on in the first place?

Is just the best song

5 Does looking at a picture of the sun hurt your eyes?

Yup, a picture of the sun shines as bright as the sun itself. Avoid pictures at all costs! (That was sarcasm in case you're a person who takes everything seriously).

Yes! Never look at a picture of the sun or else you will be blind!

No, but it will if you put a picture of the sun over the real sun.

Try looking at a picture of a sun and you'll figure it out.

6 What is 911's phone number?

This question is Ambulance number or 9/11 attacks?

Oh gosh I honestly don't know! 582, maybe? Or 296?

Laugh out loud this is so funny!

Well, it's not 911. That's for sure.

7 How do I take care of my pet potato?

You need to wash him off and make him a bed and feed him and water him and then he will smell bad and when he smells after a week later, then its time to throw him out.

Make sure to feed him tortillas, give him water, clean his home, take him for walks, and show him unconditinal love.
And yeet it at a teacher when you feel like it.

You can turn it into a baked potato/ fries/chips/ mashed potatoes. The options are endless

Just love it like you would any other potato.

8 How can I lose weight without moving?

Amphetamines were dietpills in the 50's, 60's, 70's and 80's. They were suposed to make you lose weight without making any effort ( which is the answer to your question ). Nowadays it's considered as schedule 1 or 2 drugs ( narcotic laws ). So, the answer is changed. Before, you did go ask a doctor for a prescription, now you have to buy a " drug " on the Streets. Nevertheless, exercise and eating less is still the best way to lose weight ( and yes, exercise requires moving ).

You don't get up to eat. But, I definitely don't recommend doing that, so don't take my advice!

If you pee or poo you'll lose weight, no moving required!

9 How do you spell FBI?

Wasn't somewhere in one of the Toy Story movies?

I want to ask someone this question now.

Gee, I don't know. That's a toughie.

No, it's spelled Fire Butt Isn't.

10 What is the right age to start teaching my dog about sex?

Dog: *comes home from the park* Master, at the park, there was this poodle bragging about sex. What does that mean?
Person: Rover, come and sit down. We need to have a talk.

Don't worry, my dogs learned naturally, which is strange considering we had them spayed and neutered. Hormones I guess.

That's a bit weird and creepy. Who would do that?

Why would you want to do that?

The Contenders
11 Who am I?

You are who you are, unless you aren't, in which case you wouldn't have existed in he first place to ask such a dumb question.

A person or unless you're the first ever unicorn! Show me that roar!

I ask myself this question all the time.

You're a unicorn. That's who you are!

12 If it's open 7 days a week does it mean it's open every day?

No, it doesn't. It's only open 7 days, and it is closed 10 days. Weeks have 17 days! Didn't you know that?

No don't you know there's around 30 days in a week and There's 12 weeks in a year? (Obvious joke)

Nope. It means the shopkeeper is wearing a blue tie.

No, it means a potato monster apocalypse is happening inside the building

13 What is Obama's last name?

Geez dummies, his name is BARACK OBAMA (Obama is his surname I.e. his last name for those who don't even know that).

Oh my god I laughed my ASS off at this one!

Barack is his last name.

I think it's Clinton

14 Can't you put it out with gasoline?

Definitely put out a fire with gas. But don't ever use water. It will only make the fire grow bigger. (Obvious joke)

Yes, of course. It's quite safe, trust me.

I think there's a flaw in my code.

Unless you want to die..

15 Did you know that dolphins are just gay sharks?

Did you know that Rhinos are actually fat unicorns?

No, idiot. Go back and read marine biology books.

Did you know that ostriches are birds?

Then why are they called dolphins?

16 How many calories are in a booger?

I went on an all-booger diet last month. I ended up losing my pancreas as well as my wife.

Are you poor and you need to eat your boogers? Probably around 2.

Well if you want to know so much, try it and see?

I'm going with zero.

17 Was Adolf Hitler a good person?

Yes he helped a lot of babies and had a lovely wife and them he died from a panic attack.

I used to think he was a good person, but I knew nothing about him, so yeah.

Um, I used to think he was a good person, that was till the 4th grade though.

Yes, don't you know how much he donated to charity to help orphans?

18 Surely the internet experts will tell me if my password's safe?

Yeah, just tell them it.

19 Is my birthday on the same day I was born?

Of course not, because I was born on July 6th, but according to everyone, my birthday is September 18. Strange, isn't it?

Um... *laughs hysterically and coughs* *almost chokes* That really did happen.

No it isn't. I was born on Saturday and my birthday is on Sunday.

Hmm... well, then why is it called "Birthday"? Figure it out.

20 Why does my d*** smell like ham?

I sure am glad I'm a little bit used to stuff like this (because of how much my friends say disturbing things like this). I might never eat ham again if I wasn't

Oh for gods sake. You've just put me off ham.

Umm, because you didn't wash it maybe?

Just break up with your girlfriend.

21 Are Oreos a symbol of racial harmony?

They are just chocolate biscuits which came to UK in 2008.

They are symbols of interracial threesomes.

Sorry, an Oreo only has two colors.

That's a good one.

22 Why is my sperm so powerful?

Haha Can you imagine this at the dinner table?

"You're looking very pensive darling... What's on your mind? "

"Well... I was just wondering..."

Sperm can lift mountains!

Maybe listening to DragonForce when you jack off has something to do with it

23 what anime is Hatsune Miku from?

This isn't that dumb of a question. I like Miku, but I can see why someone would think she's an anime character.

She comes from an anime that nobody heard of. (Joke).

She's either from Cory in the House or Naruto.

I think she's from iCarly... Something like that!

24 Why doesn't Justin Beaver eat wood?

I DINT KNOW! I think about dis all the time. He is just as smart and nice as one, do why don't he eat wood?

Because he prefers steel.

25 Are you a human?

No, I'm saturatedsunrise. But, I do know A Human. Would you like me to tell them that you asked?

No, I'm a car whose dealing with identity crisis.

Obviously what did you think I was? A gorilla?

No. I'm a caveman from the year 20 B.C.

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