1 "I am the VIEW! I am the TABLE! I am the VIEW! I am the TABLE! I am all THIS! I am the ROOT! The PROGRESS! The AGGRESSOR! I AM THE TABLE! I AM THE TEN STORIES! I AM THE TABLE! I AM, I AM, I AM, I AM, I AM!" - The View (Lou Reed and Metallica)
And would you believe that Lou Reed's vocal performance in this song is somehow even WORSE than this quote?
Either way, metal itself might not necessarily be dead, but Metallica sure as HELL is, and the entire home album OF this song is living proof
2 "R, B, Rebecca BLACK! So chilling in the front side; in the BACK seat, I'm DRIVING, cruising! FAST LANE, SWITCHING LANES, with a car at my side! Passing by, it's a school bus, IN FRONT OF ME! Makes tick tock, tick tock, wanna SCREAM" - Friday (R. Black)
Seriously, did Pato REALLY need to put SO much emphasis on the word "black" in this part of the song?
I'm WHITE and even I find this incredibly offensive (honestly, how can you be stupid enough to not only say that you're driving in the back seat "on the front side" of the car when you are CLEARLY driving in the front seat, THEN say that you're about to switch lanes on a two-lane highway when there is a car RIGHT NEXT TO YOU, then last but most DEFINITELY not least, say that a fracking SCHOOL BUS "makes tick tock")
For the record, this Neanderthal, believe it or not, was actually the one who wrote the REST of the song too
3 "Hitler never DIED! The Holocaust's a LIE! Six MILLION JEWS!? SHOW me the PROOF! The MOON landing's FAKE! They NEVER went in space! Our PRESIDENT'S a CLONE! He always gets REPLACED!" - Flex Like David Icke (Pink Guy)
I think David Ike is a pretty cool guy. Eh theorizes that the Juice are reptaleins and does'nt afrade of anything.
4 "PICK BURNING CRY FLY, CHOP CHOKE!" - I Am A Master, And You? (UmJammer Lammy)
The only reason why this isn't #1 is because it's actually pretty brilliant in the context of the game; Master Onion is, in fact, precisely foreshadowing the entire storyline (if you can even CALL it that) of the game through song lyrics
5 "England is my City" - It's Everyday Bro (Jake Paul)
6 "Gucci Gang, Gucci Gang, Gucci Gang, Gucci Gang, Gucci Gang, Gucci Gang, Gucci Gang, Gucci Gang" - Gucci Gang (Lil Pump)
7 "Cream Rahul, Cream Rahul, Rahul, Tommy" - Todokete (Lil Meerkat)
What does this even mean
How is this not number 1
What lyricism is this...
8 "(TIMMY!) And the lords of the UNDERWORLD! Darkness fills my HEART with pain! (TIMMY!) And when girls start to SLEEP with girls! (TIMMY TIMMY!) Beelzebub will RISE again! (NO TEARS)" - Timmy And The Lords Of The Underworld (South Park)
Dear god, the edge is so strong that it actually PHYSICALLY hurts
9 "I'm a big foot; I'm very appropriate" - I Love The Smelly Feet (Submarine Man)
10 "This beat drops like MY BALLS at the age of twelve; my nipple SHRIVELS UP like a...DEHYDRATED ELF!" - Dick Pays Rent (Pink Guy)
Why just ONE of his nipples and not BOTH of them? THE WORLD MAY NEVER KNOW
The Contenders
11 "She got a big booty, so I call her Big Booty" - Birthday Song (2 Chainz)
12 "If p**** was a vegetable, I would definitely grow it" - Watermelon (Santa's Brother)
13 "I have a small d*ck, I have a small d*ck, If your under 9 inches you cannot pleasure women" - Small D*ck (Pink Guy)
14 "We can plant a house; we can build a tree; or if you WANT, we can do all three" - Breed (Nirvana)
Sorry, but being intentional STILL doesn't excuse this
15 "I know you smell the perfume" - SESE (6ix9ine)
That song title makes no sense at ALL.
16 "B***h I got blue hair and I'm looking like an Avatar" - Had (Lil Pump)
17 "And when you SMILE, the whole world STOPS and stares for a while" - Just The Way You Are (Bruno Mars)
Egomaniacal exaggeration at its most excruciatingly egregious
18 "I got more ice than a figure skater" - Wrist Frosty (Riff Raff)
19 "KISS! ME! K-K-KISS ME! Infect me with your love and fill me with your poison! TAKE! ME! TA-TA-TAKE ME! Wanna be a victim ready for abduction!" - ET (Katy Perry)
20 "I'm in LOVE with the shape of you; we push and PULL like a magnet do! Although my heart is falling too, I'm in LOVE with your BODY!" - Shape Of You (Ed Sheeran)
21 "The square root of 69 is 8 something, right? Cause I've been tryna work it out." - What's My Name? (Rihanna)
At least it shows SOME degree of elementary mathematical knowledge; however,
1) it's COMPLETELY irrelevant to the song
2) it's a lame and cheaply forced "69" joke
3) if you've got an up-to-date mobile phone, you've got a calculator that'll tell you that for you INSTANTLY
Whoever wrote these ridiculous lyrics must have had to fail in mathematics. It sounds super cheesy.
22 "Write out a complaint and place it in your rectum" - Original (Unkle Adams)
23 "And if you tell my heart, my achy breaky heart, he might blow UP and kill this man" - Achy Breaky Heart (Billy Ray Cyrus)
Can anyone say "cornier than corn itself"
24 "Shove a gerbil in your (butt) through a tube" - Fack (Eminem)
25 "I'm the s**t, I'm fartin, I don't know how to potty" - Drowning (A Boogie wit da hoodie)
I still like the song though