Top 10 Stupidest Song Lyrics

xandermartin98
Get ready to facepalm, folks (totally not at my content, I swear)

The Top Ten

1 "I am the VIEW! I am the TABLE! I am the VIEW! I am the TABLE! I am all THIS! I am the ROOT! The PROGRESS! The AGGRESSOR! I AM THE TABLE! I AM THE TEN STORIES! I AM THE TABLE! I AM, I AM, I AM, I AM, I AM!" - The View (Lou Reed and Metallica)

And would you believe that Lou Reed's vocal performance in this song is somehow even WORSE than this quote?
Either way, metal itself might not necessarily be dead, but Metallica sure as HELL is, and the entire home album OF this song is living proof - xandermartin98

2 "R, B, Rebecca BLACK! So chilling in the front side; in the BACK seat, I'm DRIVING, cruising! FAST LANE, SWITCHING LANES, with a car at my side! Passing by, it's a school bus, IN FRONT OF ME! Makes tick tock, tick tock, wanna SCREAM" - Friday (R. Black)

Seriously, did Pato REALLY need to put SO much emphasis on the word "black" in this part of the song?

I'm WHITE and even I find this incredibly offensive (honestly, how can you be stupid enough to not only say that you're driving in the back seat "on the front side" of the car when you are CLEARLY driving in the front seat, THEN say that you're about to switch lanes on a two-lane highway when there is a car RIGHT NEXT TO YOU, then last but most DEFINITELY not least, say that a fracking SCHOOL BUS "makes tick tock")

For the record, this Neanderthal, believe it or not, was actually the one who wrote the REST of the song too - xandermartin98

3 "PICK BURNING CRY FLY, CHOP CHOKE!" - I Am A Master, And You? (UmJammer Lammy)

The only reason why this isn't #1 is because it's actually pretty brilliant in the context of the game; Master Onion is, in fact, precisely foreshadowing the entire storyline (if you can even CALL it that) of the game through song lyrics - xandermartin98

4 "Hitler never DIED! The Holocaust's a LIE! Six MILLION JEWS!? SHOW me the PROOF! The MOON landing's FAKE! They NEVER went in space! Our PRESIDENT'S a CLONE! He always gets REPLACED!" - Flex Like David Icke (Pink Guy)

I think David Ike is a pretty cool guy. Eh theorizes that the Juice are reptaleins and does'nt afrade of anything. - xandermartin98

It's pink guy. he's like that -_- - LightningStrike

Joke flies over your head like an airplane. - Not_A_Weeaboo

5 "(TIMMY!) And the lords of the UNDERWORLD! Darkness fills my HEART with pain! (TIMMY!) And when girls start to SLEEP with girls! (TIMMY TIMMY!) Beelzebub will RISE again! (NO TEARS)" - Timmy And The Lords Of The Underworld (South Park)

Dear god, the edge is so strong that it actually PHYSICALLY hurts - xandermartin98

6 "This beat drops like MY BALLS at the age of twelve; my nipple SHRIVELS UP like a...DEHYDRATED ELF!" - Dick Pays Rent (Pink Guy)

Why just ONE of his nipples and not BOTH of them? THE WORLD MAY NEVER KNOW - xandermartin98

7 "Cream Rahul, Cream Rahul, Rahul, Tommy" - Todokete (Lil Meerkat)

What lyricism is this... - MusicLover132

What does this even mean - YeezySeasonApproaching

How is this not number 1 - YeezySeasonApproaching

8 "We can plant a house; we can build a tree; or if you WANT, we can do all three" - Breed (Nirvana)

Sorry, but being intentional STILL doesn't excuse this - xandermartin98

9 "England is my City" - It's Everyday Bro (Jake Paul)
10 "And when you SMILE, the whole world STOPS and stares for a while" - Just The Way You Are (Bruno Mars)

Egomaniacal exaggeration at its most excruciatingly egregious - xandermartin98

The Contenders

11 "I'm a SPIRITUAL lyrical individual SPIRITUAL miracle lyrical individual SPIRITUAL miracle individual, SKIPPING and flipping and dipping and SKIPPING and flipping and dipping the ILL-EST, the KILL-EST, the SKILL of the WILL-EST!" - Real Hip Hop (PolitikZ)
12 "And if you tell my heart, my achy breaky heart, he might blow UP and kill this man" - Achy Breaky Heart (Billy Ray Cyrus)

Can anyone say "cornier than corn itself" - xandermartin98

13 "The square root of 69 is 8 something, right? Cause I've been tryna work it out." - What's My Name? (Rihanna)

At least it shows SOME degree of elementary mathematical knowledge; however,
1) it's COMPLETELY irrelevant to the song
2) it's a lame and cheaply forced "69" joke
3) if you've got an up-to-date mobile phone, you've got a calculator that'll tell you that for you INSTANTLY - xandermartin98

Whoever wrote these ridiculous lyrics must have had to fail in mathematics. It sounds super cheesy.

14 "I'm the s**t, I'm fartin, I don't know how to potty" - Drowning (A Boogie wit da hoodie)

I still like the song though - oneshot

15 "I'm a big foot; I'm very appropriate" - I Love The Smelly Feet (Submarine Man)
16 "Gucci Gang, Gucci Gang, Gucci Gang, Gucci Gang, Gucci Gang, Gucci Gang, Gucci Gang, Gucci Gang" - Gucci Gang (Lil Pump)
17 "If p**** was a vegetable, I would definitely grow it" - Watermelon (Santa's Brother)
18 "I ain't never been the one to gasp, but I had no idea it could taste like that" - Apple Berry Nana (Eric Bellinger)

Cringe! Who would even say this in real life. - DaWyteNight

19 "SNEAK out your house! Let me take you for a long drive! Let me climb your tree! PUT MY FINGER IN YOUR BEE HIVE! The stinger gets stung; we're not too young; got something to show you ON THE TIP OF MY TONGUE!" - Girlfriend (Kabbage Boy)
20 "Body like a back road, driving with my eyes closed; I know every curve like the back of my hand" - Body Like a Back Road (Sam Hunt)
21 "I know you smell the perfume" - SESE (6ix9ine)

That song title makes no sense at ALL. - PhoenixAura81

22 "Your love was handmade for some BODY like me" - Shape Of You (Ed Sheeran)
23 "That's IT, sir! You're LEAVING! The CRACKLE(!) Of PIG skin! The DUST and(!) the SCREAMING! The YUPPIES NETWORKING! THE PANIC! THE VOMIT! The panic! The vomit! God LOVES his children...God LOVES his children, yeah!" - Paranoid Android (Radiohead)

THAT'S IT, SONG, YOU'RE ENDING

THE TRACK LIST'S ADVANCING

NOW PLEASE STOP PRETENDING

THIS SONG HAS ANY MEANING

IT'S RANDOM, WEIRD NONSENSE

It's random, weird nonsense

I wrote it while drunk; I wrote it while drunk, yeah - xandermartin98

24 "KISS! ME! K-K-KISS ME! Infect me with your love and fill me with your poison! TAKE! ME! TA-TA-TAKE ME! Wanna be a victim ready for abduction!" - ET (Katy Perry)
25 "Scara-MOUCHE, Scara-MOUCHE; will you do the fan-DAN-go? THUNDERBOLTS AND LIGHTNING, very very frightening ME! GALILEO! Galileo! GALILEO! Galileo! GALILEO FIGARO! MAGNIFICOOO-OOO-OOO-OOO-OOO!" - Bohemian Rhapsody (Queen)

Just watch the queen stans come... - LilliamPumpernickel

26 "If one finger ain't enough, we can go for you; maybe even use a gerbil or a gopher too!" - Gays 4 Donald (Pink Guy)

* go for two - xandermartin98

27 "Flex like David Icke" - Flex Like David Icke (Pink Guy)
28 "Make 'em go AH, AH, AH, as you SHOOT across the SKAH, AH, AHH" - Firework (Katy Perry)
29 "Did I eat my DRINK? I thought MILK was PINK!?" - Fright Flight (UmJammer Lammy)
30 "Shove a gerbil in your (butt) through a tube" - Fack (Eminem)
31 "So FINE, oh MINE; I'ma treat'cha like a PORCUPINE! (Say WHAT?) Got the kind of lover THAT'S GOT A HEART LIKE A VALENTINE! (YO, KABBAGE BOH-OY!)" - Girlfriend (Kabbage Boy)
32 "My style is RICH, DOPE, PHAT in which today we're gonna bake a cake that looks RICH!" - Cheap Cheap's Rap (Parappa The Rapper)
33 "Wish my bear was in the air with no more time to spare; casino here, casino there, CASINO IN MY CHAIR!" - Casino In My Hair (UmJammer Lammy)
34 "Now I might as well...I might as well sleepy jack the fire drill; run around, around, around, around, around" - Morning Bell (Radiohead)
35 “She talking bout how I’m the next big thing / Bitch, shut the f**k up and suck this big thing” - Next Big Thing (Blueface)
36 "She got a big booty, so I call her Big Booty" - Birthday Song (2 Chainz)
37 "From all the unborn chicken voices in my head" - Paranoid Android (Radiohead)
38 "It's Everyday Bro with that Disney Channel flow" - It's Everyday Bro (Jake Paul)
39 "If the light is off, then it isn't on" - So Yesterday (Hillary Duff)
40 "Gotta have my bowl; gotta have cereal" - Friday (Rebecca Black)
41 "I THOUGHT I just MADE some coffee for me!? I WANT some APPLES and berries to EAT?!" - Fright Flight (UmJammer Lammy)
42 "Write out a complaint and place it in your rectum" - Original (Unkle Adams)
43 "Popped a Molly, I'm sweatin" - All Gold Everything (Trinidad James)
44 "B***h I got blue hair and I'm looking like an Avatar" - Had (Lil Pump)
45 "I got more ice than a figure skater" - Wrist Frosty (Riff Raff)
46 "Got her saved on my phone under Big Booty" - Talk Dirty (Jason Derulo)

Behold 2 Chainz worst song made with Chris Brown's terrible clone! - MusicLover132

47 "I have a small d*ck, I have a small d*ck, If your under 9 inches you cannot pleasure women" - Small D*ck (Pink Guy)
48 "You really wanna make my HEART bend" - Girlfriend (Kabbage Boy)
49 "A MULATTO! AN ALBINO! A MOSQUITO! MY LIBIDO! YEAH!" - Smells Like Teen Spirit (Nirvana)
50 "Sometimes we swim around, like the dolphins in the ocean of our hearts" - Every Other Time (LFO)
PSearch List

Related Lists

Songs With The Best Lyrics Rock Songs with the Best Lyrics Top 10 Songs with the Most Beautiful Vocals and Lyrics Top Ten Opening Lyrics in Songs Michael Jackson Songs with the Best Lyrics

List Stats

100 votes
73 listings
188 days old

Top Remixes (6)

1. "I am the VIEW! I am the TABLE! I am the VIEW! I am the TABLE! I am all THIS! I am the ROOT! The PROGRESS! The AGGRESSOR! I AM THE TABLE! I AM THE TEN STORIES! I AM THE TABLE! I AM, I AM, I AM, I AM, I AM!" - The View (Lou Reed and Metallica)
2. "PICK BURNING CRY FLY, CHOP CHOKE!" - I Am A Master, And You? (UmJammer Lammy)
3. "R, B, Rebecca BLACK! So chilling in the front side; in the BACK seat, I'm DRIVING, cruising! FAST LANE, SWITCHING LANES, with a car at my side! Passing by, it's a school bus, IN FRONT OF ME! Makes tick tock, tick tock, wanna SCREAM" - Friday (R. Black)
xandermartin98
1. "Cream Rahul, Cream Rahul, Rahul, Tommy" - Todokete (Lil Meerkat)
2. "England is my City" - It's Everyday Bro (Jake Paul)
3. "She got a big booty, so I call her Big Booty" - Birthday Song (2 Chainz)
YeezySeasonApproaching
1. "Cream Rahul, Cream Rahul, Rahul, Tommy" - Todokete (Lil Meerkat)
2. "I know you smell the perfume" - SESE (6ix9ine)
3. "B***h I got blue hair and I'm looking like an Avatar" - Had (Lil Pump)
LiterallyMusic3482

WRemix
View All 6

Error Reporting

See a factual error in these listings? Report it here.
P