Top Ten Things We Learned from Horror Movies

The Top Ten

1 Killers are persistent

After possibly 18-20 innocent deaths, the bad guy dies finally. And we say Good always wins over Evil.

Them old jason voorhees is one tough primate to kill.

2 Its the final trilogy but we got so much money leftover to make another sequel

3 With every anthology, its really the same plot

Best example of this Friday the 13th, Final Destination, Nightmare on Elm Street and Saw.

4 Who's going to die, the character who isn't the central character

5 Put "Based on a true story" to piss peoples trousers

6 Run? No, stand there and scream

That is one of the stupidest things people do in horror movies. If you wanna live than run for your life! Don't stand there like a scarred baby!

7 The closer you are the someone, the more chances of them being a killer

8 Melee and no rangey

9 Don't have sex in the middle of the woods at night

Who's geniu idea is "hey do you want to have sex in the creepy woods that might have something evil in it"

You have sex, dead. You go alone in, dead. Cars don't start. Phone doesn't work.

10 Cars are a troll

I could just imagine a troll face appear when the camera is outside the car when the main dude is trying to start it up...

The Contenders

11 Always turn on the lights

I do that anyway. I kind of want to see what's in front of me.

12 People have two left feet

13 Run. Out. The. Front. Door!

Going through the back door is cliched and the killer is obviously there...

14 Don't be anything but Caucasian

It doesn't matter what color your skin is.

15 The African American sacrifices himself

Horror movies are racist.

16 If you are alone, you're dead

17 Splitting Up When a Killer is Lurking Near is Superior

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