Top Ten Worst But Funniest Things to Say As a Kindergarten Teacher

Unicorn

The Top Ten

1 So Does Anyone Have Anything For Show And Tell That's Not Extremely Boring?

This is how I nuke this place! - SamuiNeko

Does mayonnaise and horseradish count? - IcetailofWishClan

I do! I do! This is my hamster - Martinglez

(in a kindergarten class in an elementary school in Nevada's Clark County School District)
Teacher: Time for show and tell! Who has an awesome item to show the class today!
Student: I DO I DO!
Teacher: OK great!
Student: (takes out a glittery bra from his or her backpack). My mom works as one of the showgirls on the Strip and this is part of her costume!
Students: WOW! Your mom's a stripper!
Teacher: (embarrassed) Oh wow...that is... very interesting. Thank you for sharing...

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2 That's a Nice Picture of a Cat, But We're Drawing Dogs Idiot.

I heard words similar to this when I was in art class (but imagine it in mandarin). The teacher was always just drawing something stupid. You shouldn't put reigns on something meant for creativity. - keycha1n

Kid: (erases cat's tail and draws dog body") Look! It's CatDog!

I prefer cats over dogs,deal with it. - SamuiNeko

3 I Don't Care About Your Problems (Insert Name Here), Oh Wait You're Bleeding.

I see that your ankle is broken, here's a bandage. Go whine about it to the nurse. - Pegasister12

4 I Don't Care If It's Just a Fire Drill (Insert Name Here) Get Out of My Way.
5 In Conclusion, Sharks Kill a Lot. Ok Our Next Unit is Crocodiles.
6 Elsa Isn't Real. Get Better Role Models Like Miley Cyrus or Kanye West!

No let's make Donald Trump our role model... Just kidding LOL. - MeaganSaysHI

Or, better yet! Make your role model from a book! Fictional characters are amazing. - Merilille

7 F***!

Kids cussing isn't good, but I meant Kindergarten teachers. - Unicorn

I agree with Blue topaz. Little kids cursing isn't right. - AnonymousChick

This isn't funny. Little kids screaming cusswords is just sickening. - BlueTopazIceVanilla

8 What Movie Do You All Want to See? Poltergeist or Texas Chainsaw?
9 Cry (Insert Name Here) Cry!
10 Get Out!

The Contenders

11 I Hate Teaching

Let's save this one for a list of what teachers would say if they were being honest. - keycha1n

12 Get Your Facts Right, Idiot!
13 Please Throw All Your Beliefs and Suspicions Out of The Window When Confirming Anything
14 Lets Play 7 Minutes In Heaven

(after nuking)We're in heaven now,how do we go back? - SamuiNeko

15 I Don't Care What You Think

At least you care enough to response. - SamuiNeko

16 You Guys Are All Dumb! Start Revising More!
17 We're Doing An Exam Today
18 You're a Whore
19 The answer is Wongtong
20 What If I Told You That I Don't Want to Learn and You're a Stupid Pathetic Excuse of a Teacher?
21 Wanna listen to "FACK" by Eminem?

Yea!

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