1 I thought this would happen in a strip club...
A way to draw yourself some attention - PositronWildhawk
Well that would be interesting... - ethanmeinster
Why not on the cemetery instead?
Hey, s'up how's the wedd-*awkward stares* wait this isn't a strip club is it... - jmepa1234
2 Leave me the bride in your will, will ya?
If you're a creep, go for it. - PositronWildhawk
Wow we have a creep here! - kidlava111
3 You may now kiss her. First door on the right; I'll leave you two alone for five minutes.
Five minutes?! You mean it takes some men THAT LONG?! (just to have a snog I mean - ahem)! - Britgirl
4 Too bad all of your college funds were put into this.
5 So, when's the first one coming? Nine months, or earlier than that?
My brother was born when my mom was 20, My sis was born when my mom was 21, and I was born when my mom was 23, and my mom is 37 she has been married since she was 17 so she has been married for 20 years, 21 in October 2015. The oldest was born 3 years after marriage. - MeaganSaysHI
I was actually born 3 months after my parents got married... - Danielsun182
I was born 1 year after my parents were married in 2000, on Saturday 28th July 2001. I'm 13 this year! - ArpstaAmy333
The problem is, that nobody cares when your parents were born and when you get 13. I means, why would you post such a comment? Just to annoy me
6 It's never too late to change brides. Maybe try out my sister.
I could imagine the grooms expression
7 Now that you're married, girl, you might wanna train as a personal waitress like most brides.
So, is that where you got that Chinese burn? - PositronWildhawk
8 Hey, I invited your ex. It may have been an obnoxious experience before, but nowadays s/he's rather impressionable.
9 We also do funerals. And weddings afterwards at no charge.
Haha! I can't help not laughing at this!... Sorry. - funnyuser
10 Kiss already!!
When you get impatient. - RoseWeasley
11 You married an ugly guy
In my opinion my boyfriend is cute. To everyone else he is average looking. I love him just the way he is. - Ihateschool
12 Kill yourself
13 Do you have insurance for your new tub?
14 I wish I were married to that woman. I mean, just look at that hot ass of her's!
15 I hate everything about you!
16 Let's crash this wedding!
17 Dear lord, please give the bride a stroke or something
I would say I am suicidal so jokes on you. - Ihateschool
18 Hey groom, you just had sex with the Corpse Bride!
19 You know, it's not to late to call it off. I mean, are you sure you want to do this, her stomach is pretty big.
20 When do we get to the cake? That's the only reason I showed up!
21 Hon, why are you getting married to Shrek?
22 I'm just here to drink, I don't even care about your happy perfect time
23 Yeah, I got the best of both worlds there. Great housekeeping with the wife and amazing sex with her best friend.
Love this one. Also something to say at her funeral.
24 So! The honeymoon is the big night for love making. Are you nervous?
25 That guy looks like a rapist
26 I feel like a new woman now I'm married - unfortunately so does my does my husband. . .
27 I feel like a new woman now I'm married - unfortunately so does my husband. . .
This is as close to personal experience as it gets. Although I never quite made it to the marriage part. HIS LOSS. Haha! - Britgirl
28 The groom is like a potato. Good in the sack, and hardly leaves the couch.
29 Snap! I was going to marry her, idiot.
... I'm sorry this was too funny... !
30 (Teasing) You Have a Crush! You Have a Crush!
31 Husband and Wife, Sittin' In a Tree. K-i-s-s-i-n-g!
Of course. This should be number one
This should be number one
32 His nose is too big
33 He looks like a pig
34 This marriage will never last
35 Divorce will come very fast.
36 You'll both be alone!
37 So, say "adios!"
38 Your husband is gross.
39 When I was drunk, you were prettier, soo.... I'm out of here, bye you psycho b****!
That is just cold. - MeaganSaysHI
40 I'm a pancake!
41 You may kiss the guy
42 I'll give them 3 months, tops
43 I object!
44 I'm sexy and I know it!
45 So when do we bang?
46 Nice boobs
47 Love will tear us apart anyway
48 Babe I'm gonna leave you!
49 I only married you because you've got a nice body
50 Save our porn for the honeymoon