Worst Lines of Dialogue from SpongeBob SquarePants

I am also including parts of lines and songs. At some parts, I have edited some of the lines if they were too long or excessive.

The Top Ten

1 "Gary! You put Puffy Fluffy down right now!" - Spongebob, A Pal for Gary

In the scene, Puffy Fluffy, SpongeBob's new pet, has turned into a hulking beast and is strangling Gary. When SpongeBob sees this, he acts so stupid the audience wants Puffy Fluffy to strangle him too. Even SpongeBob did this before in the episode, it could be seen as a careless mistake. However, when it gets to this part, it get infuriating.

So infuriating. Why was SpongeBob this retarded anyway?

This episode is so horrible. - Lasvegasxavier

2 "Looks like you guys forgot your boat smarts!" - Spongebob, Boat Smarts

This is bad because it comes right after literally nothing but five and a half minutes of Squidward getting tortured for doing the right thing. These forms of torture include getting macerated by a spiked roller, crashing into a wall (because of SpongeBob's carelessness), and crashing his car in a huge traffic accident (also caused by SpongeBob). That last scene with the city-wide traffic crash is where SpongeBob delivers this line, which the accident was caused by him but refuses to accept that.

Oh my god I wanted to break my T.V. after this line.

Never mind...

3 "You can't always expect my usual stupidity. I like to mix it up. Keep you on your toes" - Patrick, The Card

This means that all of Patrick's stupidity is intentional. Enough has been said.

I think this is breaking the fourth wall because Patrick is somewhat dumb in some episodes and in others he is the dumbest ever.

4 "Go away, cheese head! Can't you see I'm trying to get run over!" - Plankton, One Coarse Meal

The WORST Spongebob quote by far. Though the "I guess crying does solve your problems after all" quote is both cheesy and has lousy messages, this is a downright suicide joke, which is the worst kind. - Emberflight_of_StormClan

Plankton clearly wants to die. How can it get any clearer than that?

The worst... THE WORST... quote from SpongeBob. - Minecraftcrazy530

This should never have been put in a kids' show.

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5 "Haven't you learned anything about sharing?" - Patrick, Your's, Mine, and Mine

Not ONE line is worse than this! At least the one from The Card where Patrick pretty much admits he feigns his stupidity is a pretty smart fourth wall break. And "You put Puffy Fluffy down" is funny in a "so bad it's good" sort of way. THIS line however pretty much outs Patrick as a selfish immature child.

This is the last line of an episode where Patrick does anything but share.

Worst line ever

6 "I guess crying does solve your problems after all." - Spongebob, Stuck in the wringer.

Yeah, crying does solve your problem (sarcasm) - Delgia2k

This is not a good message for the kids.

They can't do morals right. - DapperPickle

7 "I've been doing some calculating and it turns out that I'll save a whole nickel if I cut your salary completely." - Mr. Krabs, Spongebob, You're Fired.

That's just lazy writing. Maybe the Krusty Krab could've went on fire but nope, A NICKEL. - Puga

Definitely Mr. Krabs' cheapness at his worst, laying off his best worker over a nickel.

8 boom-boom-itis" -Purple Doctorfish, Squid Baby, and "Severe-oral-report-itis"-Sandy, Oral Report - Tie between "Head - go

Both have the same problem, they put "itis" at the end of a word to sound smart, when it does the opposite thing, especially for the first one.

-itis DOES NOT MEAN DISEASE! It means inflammation stupid

9 "Being unemployed is the best gig!" - Patrick, Spongebob, you're FIred

This was shown on the news before. I'm dead serious. They really did.

Again, not a great message for the kids.

10 "I'm sorry, Plankton, but that flies in the face of my good nature". - Spongebob, One Coarse Meal

A very hypocritical thing to say

SpongeBob has done things contradictory to his good nature, such as sabotaging Squidward to win "Employee of the Month," and trying to get Patrick arrested for speeding, out of jealousy in "Driven to Tears" and ETC.

That is why this quote is the most infamous of all that was ever said in the SpongeBob world.

This makes SpongeBob sound like a hypocrite because literally in the same episode, he sabotages the same person he said that line to.

What about that time you ripped off Squidward's toenail in House Fancy. Stalking Squidward in Boating Buddies. Ruined his day in Choir Boys. Letting your pet snail get tortured for absolutely no reason. From Mr. Enter, "SpongeBob, you have no good nature! Satan asks you for pointers."

I don't mind this line.

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The Contenders

11 Now I have a captive audience! - Choir Boys

Living prove that SpongeBob is torturing Squidward on purpose.

12 "Is mayonnaise an instrument?" Patrick, Band Geeks

This line is one of the many reasons for why band geeks is the worst episode ever.

This line is a classic!

I hate this episode because of this line

I don't understand why people think this line is funny. Its' a giraffe! is funny.

13 "Why are you still alive!" - Mrs.Puff, Demolition Doofus

You know, for kids!

14 "CHOCOLATE!" Tom - Chocolate with Nuts

Whoever chose this should die in Peter Rabbit's universe (nick)

I hate you this is the funniest spongebob line ever

15 "Really, he's a mess!" - Mr. Krabs, One Coarse Meal

Krabs, you do know that driving someone to suicide is murder right? So that means you would go to jail, you soulless Crustecean Cheapskate!

Why does this have to exist. Mr.Krabs is an absolute sadist

16 "it's not your body that's the problem. It's your heart." - Villager, Stuck in the Wringer

That villager was Sandals, the surfer fish who said "TOAST" in the Pranks-a-Lot episode (not the laughing one, that's Scooter). I really liked Sandals but now he's one of my least favourite townspeople...what a bummer. - Cesium

Why would people even do this? SpongeBob finally calls Patrick put, and what does everyone do? Say SpongeBob was the bad guy and that he deserved what he got. People are idiots...

I wanted to nuke that theme park after hearing that! This should be higher than #11.

17 "And it's sweet, sweet, sweet victory, yeah!" SpongeBob - Band Geeks

Whoever made this list must really hate SpongeBob!

What? This is the best quote in SpongeBob history.

This is a troll!

THIS EPISODE SUCKS

18 Tummy want more - Patrick, Smooth Jazz at Bikini Bottom

When I first heard Patrick say this I wanted to shove poop into his mouth. Does your tummy want that?!

I wanted to punch Patrick when he said that.

19 "I don't care, this is so worth it!" - Little Yellow Book

I love this line

20 Cook me up a Krabby Patty...with good old Fifi! - Patrick
21 "Now that's what I call a Viking-sized adventure!" - Spongebob, Dear Vikings
22 "Zzbbb.....more cards..." Mermaid Man, The Card

The line that shows Patrick as an idiot from Seasons 6-7

23 Now you're stuck FOREVER! - Patrick "Stuck in the Wringer
24 "There appears to be a little bit of swelling. This garbage compress should help that go down." - Patrick, "The Splinter"
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Top Ten Best Lines of Dialogue from the Star Wars Prequels Top Ten Best Lines of Dialogue In the Fairly Oddparents Best Lines Said On SpongeBob SquarePants Top Ten Best Lines In SpongeBob SquarePants Season 2 & 3 Episodes Top 10 Songs Featuring Dialogue

List Stats

100 votes
24 listings
3 years, 119 days old

Top Remixes

1. "Looks like you guys forgot your boat smarts!" - Spongebob, Boat Smarts
2. "You can't always expect my usual stupidity. I like to mix it up. Keep you on your toes" - Patrick, The Card
3. "Gary! You put Puffy Fluffy down right now!" - Spongebob, A Pal for Gary
EpicJake

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