Movie Review/Rant - Fifty Shades Freed

MegaSoulhero
(Takes deep breath) I just saw Fifty Shades Freed. It’s the third and final film in the Fifty Shades trilogy. Thank goodness! The first two movies were absolutely horrible! Two of the worst movies ever made! So of course I wasn’t anticipating the third one. I decided to give it a watch and surprise! IT WAS HORRENDOUS!

In the previous movie, Anastasia Steele gets engaged to Christian Grey. So in this movie they get married. The movie literally starts with a wedding. Not much of a build up. Just shows them getting married. They do some vacationing and other things that married couples do while a stalker is after them. And of course sex is involved a lot. I can’t stand this franchise. This movie is no better than the other two! Such a terribly atrocious film! I can’t even call this a film since nothing really happens in it! They make it so hard to care about any of these characters! The two leads have absolutely no chemistry! Yet we’ve spent three movies focusing on these two doing things as if we care about what happens to them when we really don’t. It’s hard to take them seriously during certain scenes. No one in real life acts like these characters. They’re just written in the worst way possible. I don’t blame the actors for the way they act in the film. They were probably just given bad direction. It really shows during most of the sex scenes. The movie has the same problems as the first two. The sex scenes are done poorly. The song choices are absolutely horrendous. Why do they think putting some kind of pop song in these scenes suddenly makes them enjoyable? It’s not just in the sex scenes. They pretty much go overboard with it. So many scenes have to have a pop song! Even when it’s out of place! There’s even a car chase scene with a pop song!

This movie isn’t exactly a movie. It’s pretty much just scenes of them doing “romantic” things with no story. The moment when some kind of story actually happens is at the end! And when it got to that point, it wasn’t worth the wait. The climax felt very out of place. There’s this one thing that happens to Ana at the end and we’re supposed to be worried about her. I wasn’t worried in the slightest. I was actually laughing at how ridiculous it was. Whenever they try to get us to care about the characters, they fail miserably. Even the editing is very sloppy. One moment there’s some boring crap happening, then sex! That pretty much happens throughout the entire film! And like I said before, this isn’t a film! It’s just porn! Not even enjoyable porn! That’s my problem with this franchise. Characters aren’t developed and they have a non-existent story! This one tries to be dramatic at certain points, but they mostly come out as funny rather than dramatic. I laughed at least 3 times during this! The dialogue was surprisingly worse than Attack of the Clones. It was that bad.

Skip it. Do not see this movie. That probably goes without saying. This was just torture! I can’t believe they made three of these terrible movies. Well at least this is the last one. I don’t think I would be able to handle another one. No story, terrible characters, atrocious dialogue, bad editing, bad cinematography, and very ridiculous scenes. Which is why Fifty Shades is the worst trilogy of all time.

Score: 0/10

Comments

In your opinion, do you think it is worse than The Emoji Movie? - Trollsfan536

Yes - MegaSoulhero

Can you review Early Man when it comes out in the United States, I live in the UK so I have already seen it - Gangem

It was good when I saw it, though I kind of thought it was unfinished. - Drawbox

Why, oh why must they continue this franchise?! No one except probably 12 year old perverts like this! - TristGamer

I mean, it was quite expected this would suck. - Phillip873

Do you think this is the worst Fifty Shades movie? - Gangem

Ugh I hate this franchise. Also, I heard the author got in trouble due to not knowing how BDSM works - TwilightKitsune

See A Serbian Film and you will hate it - BorisRule

I agree. Even the poster says it sucks. - LightningStrike

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