Movie Review: The Curse of La Llorona

The Curse of La Llorona is the new film in The Conjuring Universe. Yes, this film is an actual film in the universe. I wasn’t looking forward to this film since I thought a movie based on La Llorona would be stupid. The trailers looked pretty bad. But I decided to check it out anyway. I regret making that decision. Because it was ATROCIOUS!!

Since it’s a movie based on La Llorona, you know what the story is about. It’s so predictable! A woman drowns her kids, starts crying, and starts haunting other children yada, yada, yada! This film is by far the most unoriginal adapted horror film I’ve seen this year so far! Just as a film in general as well! This film has used so many things from other horror films! It’s ridiculous! From a burning hand print left on someone’s arm from when the “ghost” grabs them, to cliché bathtub scenes, to seeing the “ghost” in the mirror. This film was a copycat of moments from almost any horror film you can think of! This film has ZERO scare value! I don’t think I’ve sat through a horror film in a long time with the amount of jump scares this film had! I don’t like jump scares. It’s cheap and it all proves that the director and writers cannot create an actual horror film to get under your skin. So instead, they throw loud sounds and loud music to make the audience jump. IT’S CHEAP AND UNCREATIVE! They put the same sound for La Llorana’s shriek. It’s so predictable that you can’t help but laugh at it! La Llorona has to be the most ineffective ghost in the history of ghost films! She just can’t seem to kill anyone after the first two kids who die to get the film an R rating. There’s nothing in the film that justifies the R rating. The entire film is poorly lit to make it seem more atmospheric, but it fails miserably in this regard as most of the time, you can’t see what’s going on in the scene. I would say this film is pretty fast paced. But that’s because once it hits its third act, it drags on forever! And you know what else they did? When the third act starts, they decided to throw in some comedy! There was literally no comedy in it before! So once they start getting down to the “La Llorona” stuff, they start making jokes out of nowhere. What the heck?! WHO WROTE THIS??

The characters in this film were really stupid as well. They weren’t well written or well acted. All they do in the film was just make stupid decisions! Which means that as a viewer, you really don’t care about the things that happen to them after the big stupid mistake they made! I mean, the little girl in this film has a burnt hand print on her arm, the mother asked her what happened, and the daughter said that she fell, and the mom’s reaction was “That’s some fall, huh?” It clearly does not look like she fell, “mom”! I mean, come on! The acting in this film was wooden and their actions don’t make sense! The only person I felt that was trying was Linda Cardelini. I could actually feel the fear in her face. That was the only good thing that I can say about this film!

The Curse of La Llorona is the worst film in The Conjuring Universe since Annabelle! And to be honest, I don’t understand how this film is in the universe! Ed and Lorraine Warren never worked on this supernatural case! They killed the universe with this film! And the fact that the director of this is directing Conjuring 3 makes me worried now! Hope Annabelle Comes Home can be good. DO NOT SEE LA LLORONA!!!

Score: 1/10