Movie Review - Hellboy (2019)

MegaSoulhero Well, I knew I was making a mistake by watching this movie. The trailers looked bad, critics have been hating it, but I still saw it. And I absolutely regret doing so. Let me tell you. Hellboy (2019) is not just one of the worst comic book movies ever made, it’s one of the worst movies I’ve ever seen. This is not an exaggeration. It is so horrendous.

Plot is simple. There’s a devil named Hellboy and he has to battle an evil sorceress. One major problem with this film is the fact that it wasn’t directed by Guillermo Del Toro. He did a great job with the original two movies. There was even gonna be a third one. Unfortunately, that ended up not happening. So they instead decided to make a reboot with an all new director and with someone else playing the main character. Yeah, Ron Perlman wasn’t brought back. It’s like making a Deadpool movie without Ryan Reynolds. The guy they got to play Hellboy in this sorry excuse for a reboot is David Harbour. You may know him as officer Hopper from Stranger Things. He is great in that show. Not so great here. I don’t blame Harbour for his performance. I’m sure he was only doing what he was told to do. Hellboy here is just so irritating. There’s a lot of moments where he’s trying to be funny and it just falls flat. Even during his serious moments, he’s just so hard to take seriously. Especially with the awful makeup. All the other characters I don’t even really care about at all. They’re mostly just so bland.

It’s rare when a movie makes me want to leave the theater in the first couple of minutes. The very beginning pretty much gives us an idea of what the rest of the movie will be like. Just a bunch of cursing and violence so it could get that R rating. This is clearly a movie that focuses more on trying to be an R rated film than on the actual writing. I also want to point out that the editing is atrocious. There’s a fight scene early on and it’s hard to tell what’s happening because it cuts to different shots every 3 seconds. By the way, did I mention the CGI? It’s awful. Like, absolutely horrendous. None of it was convincing in the slightest. There’s even a major character who has a lot of screen time who is just one big CGI creature. Every time he was on screen, it was just hard to watch. There isn’t a single good shot in this film. It’s just a bunch of bad CGI and bad green screen effects. This makes the action scenes look like absolute jokes. Like using songs where they don’t fit. It doesn’t feel like these scenes really connect with each other. Everything happens too fast. It’s hard to understand what’s going on most of the time. This doesn’t give them time to develop the characters. Also, just like Dumbo, it has a habit of telling us what’s happening even though it should be there job to SHOW us what’s happening. We don’t need all this expositional voice over.

Hellboy (2019) is an abomination. I would not recommend it to anyone. It’s so inconsistent in its tone, has awful writing, and the visuals are so poor that makes it flat out unwatchable. It’s a good thing I’m seeing Endgame this week. I’ll also be seeing Booksmart on Wednesday, but I won’t review that until after Endgame. Anyway, don’t see Hellboy. It’s terrible. The end.

Score: 0/10

Comments

Terrible film - iliekpiez (4/29/2019)

How do you think of the new Sonic movie? - Drawbox (5/1/2019)

Horrendous. But at least they said they’re gonna redo Sonic’s design. - MegaSoulhero (5/4/2019)

It's gonna be an abomination even if they change the design anyway - iliekpiez (5/16/2019)

When are you gonna review Avengers: Endgame? - nicolasb5194 (5/4/2019)

I did on my YouTube channel. - MegaSoulhero (5/5/2019)

When is your Booksmart review? - visitor (5/5/2019)

Disappointing movie honestly - AlphaQ (5/19/2019)