Top Ten Worst Pokémon to Be

"SPOINK bounces around on its tail. The shock of its bouncing makes its heart pump. As a result, this POKéMON cannot afford to stop bouncing - if it stops, its heart will stop."

Spoink has to constantly bounce on its tail in order to make its heart work. If it goes too slow, it won't get the blood pumping enough and if it goes too fast, it risks a heart attack. Furthermore it balances a pearl on top of its head. If it is to lose this, Spoink can become tired of bouncing and therefore stop and then die because it wasn't getting blood pumping. If you were a Spoink, you have to bounce on your springy tail at a constant speed as well as balance a pearl on your head.

Why does it HAVE to balance a pearl? It won't die if it the pearl falls.

"Wears the skull of its deceased mother. Its cries echo inside the skull and come out as a sad melody."

Nothing is worse than living in constant grief. Meet Cubone. A pokémon which wears the skull of its mother when she dies. Cubone cries itself to sleep every night and will never show its face to the world. I can't help but feel sorry for Cubone and the miserable life it leads.

Life is a living hell for Cubone. It wears the skull of its deceased mother and its cries echo a somber melody. To make things worse, the cries attract Mandibuzz, which has bones on its head and devours Cubone.

You obviously don't care about anything if you don't feel sorry for it

"Each of them carries a mask that used to be its face when it was human. Sometimes they look at it and cry."

When humans in the pokémon world die, they become Yamasks. Some humans in the pokémon world will eventually come one. Yamasks also fall into a deep depression when they occasionally look at the mask which was their face as a human. Imagine being dead and walking around as a spirit and all you could do is cry at your real life memories. That is Yamask.

I don't think every human in the Pokemon world becomes a Yamask. Only those who died unnatural deaths or died under unnatural and tragic circumstances become one.

Imagine ash dies and becomes a yamask..

"It never sleeps. It has to keep moving because if it stopped, its magma body would cool and harden."

Life as a Slugma would be hell. Slugma has to constantly move and can never sleep ever or it will slip into a stone tomb. Slugma is also extremely slow as well. Being forced to move for eternity so you don't turn into stone? No thanks.

"They cannot see, so they tackle and bite to learn about their surroundings. Their bodies are covered in wounds."

Imagine being blind. Okay, on top of that imagine that you couldn't make use of a cane or even your hands to find your way around. Instead you had to bite things to find out what things are. You know where those wounds are from?

"A mushroom grown larger than the host’s body controls Parasect. It scatters poisonous spores."

Parasect can't control what it does at all. It is controlled by a mushroom parasite which has taken over its body completely. Imagine being completely unable to control your actions and then killing someone without being aware of it. That's the life of a parasect.

Even when it evolves, it's doomed to be zombied forever! It's forever enslaved by a zombie parasite with all it's offspring are dooms for eternity.

"Because it stores several kinds of toxic gases in its body, it is prone to exploding without warning."

So one day you were walking down the street and BOOM! You take in too much gas and explode, killing you.

"NOSEPASS’s magnetic nose is always pointed to the north. If two of these POKéMON meet, they cannot turn their faces to each other when they are close because their magnetic noses repel one another."

Nosepass can only ever face one way, and that's north. They will never look at one another because to do that requires one to turn around which they can't do.

"XATU stands rooted and still in one spot all day long. People believe that this POKéMON does so out of fear of the terrible things it has foreseen in the future."

A pokémon frozen in fear of the future it can see in its mind. This fear makes it just stand there experiencing fear and nothing else

And I get scared about my mums meatloaf

"It stores electric energy under very high pressure. It often explodes with little or no provocation."

Like Koffing, Electrode has problems with easily exploding without warning. Like I said before, it's not good to live with a risk of death coming at the blink of an eye.

Being God seems like it would be annoying.

Anyone wants to catch you

Needs to be lower...

If you become a Slowking you need some pants.

Slowking is so lazy

Whitney, Miltank, Rollout.

Most people ignore it because it just looks stupid and derpy